Love with the Proper Stranger Page #5

And she was walking down the,

you know, street...

...and she fell down and broke something...

...in her back something...

...and now she can't move both her,

you know, legs.

Excuse me, I better see if the, you know...

- Anthony.

- Oh...

If I could see what I'm eating,

I could eat.

Oh, mamma, leave it romantic.

It's romantic enough.

Excuse me, I'll go see if I can help.

- Hi.

- Hi.

Hot.

Careful, it's hot.

I'll do it.

Did you tell your mother?

I haven't told her yet.

But I'm going to.

I'm gonna tell her what uh...

I'm gonna tell her about the uh...

you know, the baby, and uh...

Well... only... what I'm gonna tell her is...

I'm gonna tell her that I'm the...

You know, the father.

Get some butter.

Cold water.

Butter, will you get the butter?

- It's all right. It's fine.

- You sure?

- You hurt yourself.

- No, no!

- No, it's nothing.

- You sure?

- Yes.

- Sit down. I'll help him.

No, I'd like to, really.

I love to help in the kitchen.

What are you gonna help.

There's nothing to help.

Both of you, sit.

All of you, you know, come on, sit down.

Too many cooks spoil the, you know...

...the broth.

Better have a doctor check that hand.

Oh, my goodness. Very sorry.

Nine out of ten accidents happen in the home.

It's statistics.

This is really a lovely room.

You have wonderful taste.

What you've done to this apartment.

Okay!

I'm ready!

Readier.

I'm uh... you know.

Anthony.

Oh, it's beautiful.

Just beautiful.

What's the idea?

Well, I thought that... you know,

like uh...

like the 4th of July, huh?

Big joke, huh?

Mamma... when Anthony gets married

you will not be losing a son.

Somebody will be gaining a cook.

it's... er...

College girl. Going to college.

You'll have to excuse my mother.

She's anti-education at the present moment.

Ever since I told her I was taking

a course in love.

A course in love?

Not really, it's just part of a course.

I only say that to agitate them.

The concept is that love...

...taken on the mature level

as opposed to the uh...

...erotic, or the so-called romantic,

with all its false conceptions, is really an art.

And like every other art,

it demands practice and patience...

...consistent dedication and hard work.

I believe that.

I really do.

Well, of course.

Now, how can any intelligent person

in this age of reason...

...make the most important selection of his

life merely on the basis of some kind of...

...vague sexual attraction?

Of course.

I mean, if two people just start out being

nice to each other...

...if they're just concerned about

what happens to each other...

...that's all...

...and they're just nice...

then I think it happens.

Don't you?

- What do you mean?

- Love.

I mean, what they call being in love.

I think that love, actually...

...as such...

...is strictly a middle-class idea.

And it is definitely on its way out.

Yes, I think so too.

Actually.

I mean, I don't think that love

is something that you...

...fall into. Like a hole in the ground.

Now, if a person is even halfway mature...

...when you consider the enormous

responsibilities involved in marriage...

...you can't take it lightly.

You can't.

Knowing that the future generation...

...is entirely due to the wisdom

of your procreation.

Of course.

- You want the...

- Sorry.

I just don't know what is the matter with me.

I'll get a towel... you know, wipe it.

Don't worry about the dress, I'm just...

...worried about the dinner table.

That's all right.

We're only lucky it wasn't, you know,

hot coffee.

Oh, it's terrible. I'm so sorry.

She's not a bad-looking girl.

But she's so clumsy.

Hi.

Oh, hi.

How're you doing?

Fine.

I was in the neighborhood...

...so I thought I'd drop up see

how you were making out.

Oh...

So, how's everything?

Fine.

No, I mean the problem.

Fine.

What do you mean fine?

Would you excuse me just a minute, please?

Listen, what time do you get off?

Let's have a cup of coffee or something.

Will you excuse me a minute?

Well, what do you say?

Shall I pick you up after?

Oh, I can't tonight.

Uh, all right, well uh...

Tomorrow then, okay?

I'll pick you up after or what?

No, I can't tomorrow night either.

Oh. What do you mean you can't?

It's a cup of coffee.

I've got a date.

With who?

What's funny?

If I didn't know better, I'd swear

you're my brother Dominic.

Look. I just wanted to see you

that's all.

See how you feel and see how you're making out.

So, fine, I saw you.

And everything's fine, so...

...fine.

Oh.

Listen...

Do you want to make it Monday?

Monday, what am I supposed to do?

Wait around until Monday?

Hey, Angie, when you get a minute.

All right, I'll meet you Monday.

I'll see you Monday.

Come here a minute.

Look, why don't you come

to my place Sunday?

I'll make dinner.

I'll take you out to dinner.

Don't you want to see my new apartment?

You want me to?

If you want to.

Okay, you got a deal.

Sunday.

Oh, wait a minute.

- You don't know where I live.

- Oh, East 11th street.

Just a minute.

Hi. Come on in.

Hi.

Man, do you look wild.

- Thank you.

- No, I mean it,

I really mean it.

- Look how surprised he sounds.

- You look so...

What am I gonna tell you?

You look like a woman.

How can you manage to make even

a compliment sound like a slap in the face?

What did I say?

You look like a woman.

I apologize, excuse me.

You look like man.

Do you wanna fight all day?

Who's fighting? I don't wanna fight.

All right, then. Sit down.

I'll make you a drink.

I don't know what it is.

First time in my life I come to see a girl

and I feel like I'm 14 years old.

Even when I was 14 I didn't feel

like that.

They're beautiful.

Thank you.

What would you like to drink?

Scotch, I don't know.

What do you got?

Scotch, gin, bourbon, vodka...

What are you, on the sauce now?

I thought you didn't drink.

- I don't.

- What are you running here? The USO?

Would you like a drink?

Thank you.

- Scotch?

- Thank you.

Water, soda or tonic?

Scotch and tonic?

Uh, very good.

Zelda,

Gin and tonic, yes.

Vodka and tonic, yes.

Scotch and tonic, no.

Water.

Thank you.

You gotta know these things

if you're gonna run...

...a respectable den of inequity.

I'll learn in my own little way.

You know something,

I'll tell you the truth.

You're kind of okay, I mean that.

I know you think I'm putting

you on, but I'm not.

I mean it.

Any other girl in your situation...

Look, will you do me a favor?

Don't pay me any more compliments.

All I'm trying to tell you is

I think you're pretty great, that's all.

You didn't ask anybody for anything...

...you didn't sit around

feeling sorry for yourself.

I think you're something.

I mean that.

And I just wanted to tell you.

Thank you.

Is it all right?

The way you like it?

Delicious.

Really?

No, I mean it. It's delicious.

It is kind of a test run for me.

The man I'm going out with is

in the restaurant business.

And so before I cook for him...

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