Lucky You Page #5

In order for you to win,

someone else has to Iose.

It seems so cruel.

So you just gamble all the time?

I never bet on sports,

never play against the house...

...and I only bet on my skills

against the skills of other people.

That sounds Iike an alcoholic saying,

"I only drink tequila."

What about Festus,

or whatever his name is...

...jumping across the floor?

You bet on that.

The chair thing's an old gag,

and I did it for you...

...because I thought

you'd think it was funny.

-Miss Offer.

-Mr. Cheever.

I thought you might be here.

I hear Roy Durucher's backing you.

You know I'd have backed you

if you'd asked me.

If I'd asked.

Hello? Yes.

Excuse me. Yes, it is available.

This is the second time I've seen you

with her. Must be some kind of record.

-She thinks I'm compulsive.

-Are you?

If I am,

I'm not hurting anyone but myself.

Touch.

It was good when I figured out how to play

poker and have a Iife too. I recommend it.

The Grecian Formula's in aisle three.

Or did you come for the waffles?

Not a bad idea.

Well, good to see

there's something of the old town Ieft.

Now, humor me a minute.

How would you have played this?

Okay, here's how it went.

Seat three, he bets. Seat four, he raises.

Seats five and six fold.

Seat seven calls. Seat eight folds.

Seat one raises over the top.

Seats two and three fold.

Seats four and seven call.

Only three players Ieft to see the flop.

You're seat four. The raise and the call.

You're sitting on something.

Yeah.

The flop comes. King of spades,

four of clubs, jack of hearts.

Hand one checks. I bet.

Hand seven folds.

Hand one...

...raises.

Sandbag. Probably two pair

or three of a kind.

Most Iikely. To be certain,

I make a small raise and he--

Calls.

-Why do you say that?

-He reads you for pocket aces.

Wants to drag you along, get another bet in

before he puts the hammer down.

Risky. I might improve.

Well, if he's two pair, he's 74 percent

favorite. Three of a kind makes him 90.

-Yeah.

-Okay.

Two of us Ieft. On the turn, six of clubs.

No help. I check.

-He bets.

-I call.

Okay, on the river

what should show up?

Another ace.

Makes me the man and a half,

three aces.

So I bet. He says:

"I don't think you had aces going in.

I think you got stubborn with a bully ace.

I think my hand is still tall."

And he raises. Big.

Something doesn't feel right. Like...

...I'm about to walk into Hydra

with his nine heads, so I just....

I call and I turn over my pocket aces.

And he rolls over....

Two clubs. One of them a king.

You got it.

A club flush. On the come-all-along.

That was a $267,000 Iesson.

I should have gotten away from it.

I had such a hard-on for my aces,

I never Iooked beyond the obvious. So....

What's the worst thing can happen

to a poker player?

Lose his nerve.

What else?

Nobody's better

than anybody else at the big tables.

They have different styles.

Different ways of doing things...

...but everybody knows how to play.

The key to winning

is watching and understanding.

There's things I don't see anymore.

A blind spot.

It's just a hand.

Could have happened to anybody.

You saw it.

Okay. Guts. Head to head.

A nickel a pop.

-Why not a dime?

-Let's go.

Two thousand dollar burn.

I'm in.

-I'm with you.

-Queen, seven.

Queen, ten.

It's coming.

-Check.

-I'm in.

Re-ante.

I'm in.

Call.

King, ten.

Beat you, slick.

Check.

-I'm in.

-Call.

Pair of tens.

I'm in.

-I've improved.

-You needed to.

-Call.

-Caught the cowboy, kings and tens.

Caught the bullet and his Iittle friend,

aces and threes.

You might want to think about quitting,

because I've got the best of it.

-Re-ante. Four thousand dollar burn.

-I don't wanna clean you out.

You playing or not?

You're not gonna be happy

till you have nothing Ieft.

I'm in.

Call. Jack, four.

Nice read.

I'm weak, but not quite that weak.

Jack, five.

I'm in.

It's yours.

This was your stake for the big one.

Take it.

I don't want it.

Pick it up.

Pick it up!

I could have played it safe.

That's not who I am.

You got it backwards, kid.

You play cards the way

you should Iead your Iife...

...and Iead your Iife

the way you should play cards.

Maybe everybody has a blind spot.

Maybe everybody has to Iearn

from their mistakes.

I sure Iearned from mine.

Fun game?

Yeah.

You've come a Iong way since pennies,

nickels and dimes on the kitchen table.

Excuse me a minute.

Boys will be boys.

Fathers will be fathers.

I tried to give it back to him.

You could Ieave it on the table.

Then the waitress

would get a $1 0,000 tip.

Well, if he's gonna take anything from me,

he's gonna have to win it, all right?

And that's not Iikely to happen.

Maybe giving and receiving are

more complicated than winning and Iosing.

Maybe so.

Good day, Miss Offer.

Right. Right. Right. Okay, Eddie.

He'II go for it. He'II go for the ten.

Want to come along? As moral support?

Sure. I'm getting an education

on what it's Iike not to be compulsive.

Come on.

Just so we're straight.

You have to run five miles...

...shoot 1 8 holes of golf, 78 strokes

or under, in Iess than three hours.

And the ball has to be in the cup

before time expires...

...for $1 0,000. Bet?

She holds the stopwatch.

She holds it where I can see it. Bet?

Bet.

-You ready?

-Ready.

Get set.

Go!

Go!

Nineteen seconds, 20, 21, 22--

Billie. Every couple of minutes

will do it just fine.

Twenty minutes.

You've gone three miles.

There it is! Thirty-nine minutes,

ten seconds.

-Pop the trunk!

-Pop the trunk, pop the trunk.

Hit a duck and it's two strokes.

AII right, you get the golf cart.

We'II meet you on the green.

Great shot!

Forty minutes, 1 0 seconds.

-How many shots?

-Four. Damn it.

Here. Move over, I'II drive.

Forty-six minutes and 50 seconds.

Fore!

-PIaying through.

-Hey. What? Who is this?

Yes!

Two hours and 1 3 minutes,

and you're two shots ahead.

You're in the rough, Huckster!

This is the Iast hole, Huckey-baby.

You only have seven minutes

and 45 seconds.

You bogey this, you're toast.

That's 75.

Only three more.

Wow! They should have

put some hazards on this hole.

-Yes!

-Sh*t!

-Seventy-six shots.

-AII right, all right!

Two hours, 57 minutes and 40 seconds.

You shank this, it's all over.

-Get in the hole.

-Stay out of the hole.

Go ball, go.

Yes, baby. Legs, Legs, Legs!

Good boy. Good boy.

Yes, yes, yes, yes.

AII right.

It's not an impossible putt.

I think Jack Nicklaus made it once.

Two hours, 59 minutes, and 46 seconds.

Forty-seven, 48.

-Your dick's beginning to sweat.

-Forty-nine, 50, 51, 52...

Your arms are heavy.

-...Fifty-three, 54, 55...

...fifty-six, 57, 58.

Yeah!

Three hours and two seconds.

You Iost.

Yes!

Yes! Yes! I win! I win!

I win. I win.

Yes!

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Three hours and two seconds.

Two seconds, baby! Yeah!

-Hey, where you going?

-I'II catch up with you.

Where's my money?

Come back here.

How come you couldn't have

helped me out a Iittle?

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