Mad City Page #7

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Get over there. He wants me to tell | you the story. Sit down over there.

You kids, you know the name | of this Indian?

This guy's name is Big John, | and he's a friend of mine.

Do you know what kind of Indian he is?

A Miwok Indian.

Do you know how to say "Miwok"?

That's good. | The Indians used to own this country.

They owned it. | This was their home.

I think I found one of | their arrowheads once.

You did?

If Big John finds out, | he'll come and get it.

So, the Miwok Indians, | they lived off the land.

They had, you know... | They had their own crops.

They hunted and built tepees like this.

And, you know, | they had kids just like you.

Big John was the chief of them.

Do you know what a chief is?

- The chief is the boss. | - That's right. The boss.

The chief is a good boss.

And a good boss knows | how to take care of his people!

He's too close to the kids.

The white man came along.

He wanted to take the land | away from the Indians.

So he killed all of Big John's people. | He killed his friends.

He killed his family.

He's got his rifle on the kids.

That made him so sad, | he just stood at the top of the valley.

He looked down and saw | that everybody he loved was killed.

And he just started | to do an Indian dance...

...to bring them back to life.

But it didn't work.

And he was so sad | that his heart froze.

- Is he still alive? | - You bet he is.

When the museum found him, | he was like this:

When I started to work here, | his hand was up here like this:

And every day I noticed it | came down like this:

Then I realized he was just | waving goodbye.

Let's go! Run!

Pick him up! | Pick him up! Run!

Behind the buffalo!

- I hope we get to see some more! | - That was cool!

Chief, it's for you!

What are you doing? | We got kids in here!

Sam, it wasn't us. | No, it wasn't us.

A nutcase made it | through the perimeter.

He says it wasn't him.

If this happens again, | I'm going to tell the parents...

...you're taking potshots at their kids.

I suggest that you tell | the FBI agent you're standing with...

...that I said so.

One moment, please. | Anything else, Sam?

Thank you.

Sh*t!

Dobbins, you're a jack-off.

doesn't it?

is using the Steve Martin defense.

- Hasn't been used in years.

Well, excuse me!

Please.

Jay Leno knows who I am.

Oh, man.

- He's a nice man. | - You met him?

I did a story on antique cars. | He collects them.

Who else you met?

Everyone from the Pope to Mel Gibson.

Mel Gibson? What's he like?

I threw him softball questions. | He threw me softball answers.

He plays softball?

I play softball. | We'd get along good.

I bet your wife didn't know | she was getting a celebrity...

...when she said yes, did she?

She knew exactly what she was getting.

Thirty-five years old and...

...the only job I can get is guarding | a museum at $8 an hour...

- How long you been doing it? | ...and I can't even keep that.

Five years.

I was in the Air Force, but I left | because they wouldn't let me fly.

- Why not? | - No college.

- Why didn't you go to college? | - No money.

But...

The results ain't in, but | it appears that I ain't too bright.

- Guess what. I didn't go either. | - Get out.

I couldn't afford it.

Then how'd you get to be so smart?

The results aren't in yet, but rumor | has it I got by on my charm.

That's something | that you got a lot of.

- Charm. | - Charm.

- Charm. Personality. | - I ain't got no personality.

Sure you do, otherwise people | wouldn't be responding to you.

Then I could do | one of those TV shows?

Why not? | You're already famous.

Yeah, but I'm famous in a bad way.

It doesn't make any difference on TV. | People know who you are.

- Like them fishing shows. | - I heard you were a big fisherman.

I'd like to do a fishing show.

Fish all day on TV and you get to go | see the best spots.

All the new equipment.

I'd like that.

I'll tell you what. When this is over, | I'll recommend you to my station.

Nah. It's over for me.

Things are bad, but at least people | are sympathizing with you now.

- Am I going to jail? | - Best-case scenario, you'll do time...

...you'll get some probation. | Then, "Sam Baily's Catfish Corner".

Yeah, right.

Stranger things have happened. | I was up and I was down.

Now I'm up again, | thanks to you.

Who knows? You might be back in your | wife's arms sooner than you think.

They got too much light, them kids.

Back in my loving woman's arms again

- You married? | - Been there.

You got kids?

- One out of three. | - What's that mean?

One kid, three wives. | My last wife didn't even wait...

...for me to leave. | She took off with the kid.

I couldn't leave my family.

You'd be surprised | what you can learn to live with.

You don't want to take those.

Sam, why don't you | get yourself some sleep?

Nothing's gonna happen, I promise.

- Can I go to the candy room? | - We're hungry.

Yeah. Go, go.

they are suggesting that...

...if you have any control | over the situation...

...it wouldn't be a bad idea | if he surrendered in the evening.

- Thursdays are particularly weak.

Oh, Jesus, Marty.

I know, Max. I know.

They're asking...

Tell them Hollander is trying to | steal my story.

They know that. They're asking you | to let him have Baily.

In exchange, | they're offering you your own show.

Magazine, "60 Minutes" format, | investigative, in-your-face...

They say, it remains to be seen...

...you will have editorial freedom.

But it's national and they're | talking about real money.

Do I lock the deal down?

and not have a future.

T-shirts here! Get your Sam T-shirts!

One size fits all!

What a circus.

They tried to cut a deal | in the Foothill fraud case.

They didn't think anybody | would notice.

Brackett was right. Banker's a crook.

- Laurie, I'd like to assign you to... | - You can help me with something.

If Baily doesn't talk tonight, | I'll need a sidebar.

Think you could plug me in | out in the field?

I wanted to free you up | to work on the bank fraud.

People have lost their life savings. | Nobody's covering the story.

- My name is Cliff Williams. | - It's not the microphone. Talk louder.

Mrs. Williams, | could you please come...

- Don't touch me. | - No one's allowed.

I must advise against this. | Your husband isn't strong enough.

Mrs. Williams, | I saved your husband's life.

His first interview | should be with Kevin Hollander.

We really need the money.

Three, two...

Cliff, Sam Baily, | the man who shot you...

...is pleading for forgiveness. | How do you feel about that?

I know Sam. | I don't think he meant to hurt me.

- The doctor said I'll be okay.

- I got no problem with Sam. | - See? You're a very lucky man.

- How's that? | - He just gave you his blessing.

- Did Cliff get money to do that show? | - Sure. It's a tabloid.

Big bucks. Show business.

- How much? | - I don't know. Ten grand.

Ten grand?

If he can get 10 grand, I could get 50. | I'm the whole deal.

- I thought this wasn't about ransom. | - This ain't about ransom.

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