Mad Money

Honey, I need more.

This is gonna

take all night.

Want a sandwich?

Maybe later.

Okay.

Hey.

Baby, where are

the road snacks?

We gotta go.

Have you seen my guitar?

Mom?

You're having

a bad dream, baby.

No sh*t.

We're gonna have to have a

conversation about your language.

Yeah. That's clearly the biggest

problem we're having tonight.

Go back to bed.

Mom!

Now!

Whew.

Okay.

Quiet.

Quiet, Rufus.

Guess what I got for you!

Yummy, yummy! Shh!

Ooh! Look what I got ya!

Cat.

Oh! Good!

There we go.

Nice Rufus.

Good dog.

See ya later.

Attention all units.

Arrest authorized.

Move in now.

You set?

- I'm good.

I have this theory.

Crime is contagious.

It's like it can just

kinda get in the air,

and it-- People can

catch it from each other.

And when they catch it,

they change.

And then they change...

other people.

The truth is we're all

capable of anything.

We don't want to

believe it's true,

but it is.

I realized it

for the first time

at Mindy and Bryce Arbogast's

Fourth of July party.

There you are!

Hi.

I knew you'd come!

Sorry I'm late.

Oh, my God.

I want you to now

I forgive you.

What for?

- Don's okay?

He's--he's great.

We're fine. We're fine.

Hey, listen, I know

you quit the club,

but if Don wants to play,

have him call me.

Oh, I--I'm sure he will,

but, you know,

he's got a whole bunch of big

interviews kind of lined up, and--

Yeah.

- Does he?

Uh-huh.

Oh, it's gonna be great.

It's gonna be great.

You're gonna be great!

Now--

- Yeah.

About the realtor.

I am okay about

Coldwell.

They're big,

it makes sense.

But I would've

cut my commission.

Mindy--

So just tell--What?

Oh, my God.

Bridget, I am so sorry.

It's not even

listed yet.

I'm sure Don was

gonna tell you.

To tell you the truth,

I don't really blame her.

I got downsized.

You're selling our house?

I'm no longer

the breadwinner.

I don't bring home

the bacon.

I produce no green.

You just-- You wanna

talk about this, sweetie?

Why on earth would I

wanna talk about it?

It's over.

What is over?

- Everything.

No.

- Our lives!

Don, for God sakes!

You are going

to find that job.

It's been over a year.

I have tried everything

I know how to try,

and I have failed,

all right?

No, no, no, no!

No, you did not fail, Don.

No! I refuse

to believe that!

Those stupid multinational

corporations merged you out of a job!

So, sweetie,

you got failed on!

Really? You know, I am so

far past statistical comfort.

Look at this!

We are $286,000

in debt.

What?

- I wasn't kidding.

It's over.

Honey, why didn't you tell me?

We could have stopped.

What? Eating, driving,

living our lives?

We could live on less.

Lots of people live on less.

Absolutely. And soon,

we'll be living with them.

You know, hearing their

voices in the hallways,

smelling

their cooking.

But, hey, at least

we got our health.

Of course, we don't

have health insurance,

so if you need an X-ray,

I sell a kidney.

We'll do something.

We'll think outside the box.

Well, that's good, because

we're selling the box

and we're moving into

a smaller box,

and soon that box

will be so small,

it's the one they put us

in the ground with.

We'll get jobs,

any jobs, both of us,

and we're gonna make our payments

until this economy gets better, Don.

Yeah, well, good luck,

Bridget.

You've been out of

the workforce for some time.

Well, I've raised

two children

and made a home.

My daughter is

a clinical researcher

and my son is

a systems analyst,

and my husband is,

uh, well...

on the sofa right now.

Your degree is in

comparative literature.

Yes.

Sort of a slow sector

of the economy right now.

And your typing

is sub-standard.

Are you proficient on

any kind of software?

I'm good at Google.

Look, the truth is people

your age in the workforce

are generally considered...

real pains in the ass.

Are you aware that statement

is discriminatory and illegal?

See?

And you don't even

work for me.

A drug test?

What kind of drugs

would I have to take?

Hello?

How old am I?

No, I haven't worked

in a hotel.

I've enjoyed some wonderful

times at hotels.

Not yours.

As a waitress,

would--would I get benefits?

I don't think

that's funny.

Of course I understand

about outsourcing.

Yes.

Suppose I was willing

to move to India.

Selina. Hi.

What are you doing here?

- Your check bounced.

That's the third one.

Oh, God, I'm sorry.

I've cleaned your house.

You owe me the money.

Of course.

Honestly, Selina, I don't really

have the money right now,

but as soon as we do--

and in the meantime,

if you need any kind

of references--

I want cash.

I want cash, too.

Obviously, I don't

really have any cash.

I did the work.

You owe me the money.

How about I come clean your house

for three weeks and we call it even?

My house

is already clean.

Ah!

That's yours.

Enjoy.

Okay?

Oh, God.

Don't you know how

to do anything?

We need benefits.

I know some place.

It's work like mine,

but they have benefits.

Why don't you do it?

They won't hire people

with a criminal record.

You have a criminal record?

Arson.

Long story.

Tell me about the job.

I didn't even know what the

Federal Reserve Bank does

before I came

to work here.

Well, they set

interest rates

and they hold extra cash from all

the other banks for safekeeping.

Yeah--No, I--I asked

my husband.

Now that could be your

savings account right there.

I don't think so.

It has money in it.

Oh, we're running

a little bit behind today.

And don't think

they won't notice.

Oh, they tell you

it's for security,

but meanwhile,

the guys in the ties

are keeping track of how many

times a day we need a goddamn pee.

Ha! This place is like

a Las Vegas casino.

No windows,

no privacy,

and a shitload of money

all around here.

The only difference is

nobody here ever has any fun.

Okay, 12.

I'm shifting

to the east vault.

Now, keep your head

down in here.

You know what I mean?

And don't spray directly

on the monitors.

The secret here:

Don't want

anything.

Don't even think

about wanting it.

What you can

think about,

what you can want...

is your job.

I do, yes.

Yes, sir, I do.

I--I am thinking

about wanting...the job!

That's what I'm thinking

about wanting, sir.

Thank you so much

for helping me.

Whoo!

Check this out!

How you doing, Nina?

Not bad.

New girl.

Hey.

Hard to watch, huh?

Worn out.

We get the new bills

from the mint.

There goes your

car payment.

Oops! That's

a new sofa.

Get the one

by the desk there.

In.

Whoa.

Let's go!

It may not seem

like much,

but I do feel like,

in our own way,

we do something kinda

important here.

Oh.

Oh! Oh, God, no!

How's it going?

God.

Hello?

Bridget!

- Mindy.

Hi!

- There you are.

I was just thinking

about you actually.

We've got to talk.

Mindy, you know what?

I'm out to dinner

right now

Oh, sorry, I didn't

mean to interrupt.

I'll call you back.

I would love

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