Major League: Back to the Minors

I got it.

You want Tobik to finish

it off for you, Gus?

No I'm fine.

Just need to get out of this inning

and get a little breather.

Hey...

"Hey" nothing.

That ball is tagged!

It's going... going... nowhere.

Hold on just a minute.

Let me see that ball.

- What?

- You heard me, let me see it.

- Frozen ball, Gus.

- Where did that come from?

You shouldn't have to resort to this.

I mean, where's your pride?

You know I searched high and low.

You know I have to throw you out.

C'mon Mick, I'm five outs

from finishing this. You don't...

I'm sorry Gus, but you got to go.

You are gone. You're outa here!

Don't hold on to that too long, Mick.

If it freezes, they have to cut your

fingers off to get rid of the damn thing.

Give me some water, now!

Is that arm numb yet or is it

at that tingly, burning stage

just before everything freezes?

Well.

Look what the cat drug in.

Don't pretend to act like you're

not surprised to see me.

Picked up a whiff of your cologne

about half an hour ago.

Will you look at these fancy clothes.

- Flatterer.

- Bullshiterer.

How you doing?

Sorry I missed it.

How'd you throw?

Pretty good. Moved the ball around a lot,

even blew a few fastballs by them.

I'm okay to drive.

I know you are, but you're a little

too drunk to walk to your car.

So this nice taxi driver is

going to give you a lift.

- Strong and capable woman.

- You left out "independent".

- You must be smitten.

- Went past smitten a long time ago.

For the first time, the woman I love and

the woman I like are the same person.

That's a dangerous combo.

And the kicker is, she loves me

but she's not desperate for me.

Which could only mean,

you're desperate for her.

Six marriages had to

teach me something.

- Ever think about getting out?

- This is my last season. I'm hanging it up.

What are you going to do?

Don't know, still kicking

a few ideas around.

It just so happens that

I've got a proposition for you.

And I though you came here because

you missed the sound of my voice.

There is that...

Gus, I'd like to ask you:

how would you like to manage?

Manage?

I've got a AAA team with a heap of talent

but not a baseball player in the bunch.

What I need, what they need,

is a genuine baseball man,

someone who really knows the game.

I figure with all that you

know about baseball,

and their natural ability,

it would be a perfect match.

I don't know Rog.

I spent the better part of my life

kicking around the Minor Leagues.

Hell, my ass has gone flat from sitting

on hard benches and riding bad busses.

I ain't so sure I'm interested

in signing up for more of the same.

But this is something that you know,

something you could be really good at.

Who says I can't be good at

something other than baseball?

No one.

Look, thanks...

Come the end of the season,

I'm quitting. Cold turkey.

I know how to take

"no" for an answer,

but maybe you can do me

one little favor?

If I can.

I'd like you to take a look at

Mr. "Downtown" Anderson.

He is a pure hitter.

You got the day off tomorrow, right?

Why don't... the three of us, why we go

down and we can watch the kid play?

I'm in.

So it's either wrestle me from

the ball or let me stay in.

So I let you stay in?

- Two dogs and two Cokes.

- Just ketchup and mustard on mine.

Do my eyes deceive me or

is that who I think it is?

Slick guy, overdressed,

helmet hair, sh*t-eating grin?

You must have eyes in the

back of your head.

Leonard Huff, manager/bullshit

artist extraordinaire.

I know a broken down old

ballplayer when I see one.

No offense.

And who is this lovely

little lady?

- I'm Maggie Reynolds.

- Maggie.

- That's four bucks.

- I'll get those.

- I got it.

- No, no. Save your money.

- Here we go...

- Out of a ten.

- The change is yours, my friend

- Thank you sir.

- So, Maggie are you a baseball fan?

- As a matter of fact I am.

I manage a team, the Minnesota Twins.

Maybe you've heard of them.

Minnesota Twins. Maybe I've heard

of them... you a**hole.

First class all the way.

That's how we do it on the big team.

He says "big team" one more time,

I'm gonna pinch his neck

until his head pops off.

- Here's the kid I'm talking about.

- Now coming to the plate,

number 1, Billy "Downtown" Anderson.

Number one in your heart,

number one in the program.

Downtown!

I like this kid.

Super, just super.

I was just telling

Mr. Downtown here

that he is going to be with

the big team real soon.

No question about it.

The sooner the better

as far as I'm concerned.

What do you think, Gus?

I think he's got a real nice bat.

They say I've got a pure swing

and that I'm a natural.

As soon as you get over that lack

of confidence, the sky's the limit.

Good game. Why don't you get a shower,

don't want my star player catching a cold.

Wait a second... Gus Cantrell.

6'1, 185 lbs, throws right, bats right.

I had triples of your rookie card

when I was in grade school.

- You still got them?

- No.

I traded them all for one player

to be named at a later date.

Kidding.

See ya.

Smartass.

Well, I've got to roll.

- I've got to get back...

- Back to the big team?

- Margaret...

- Nice meeting you.

Listen, you ever get tired of the Minor

Leagues, you give me a call. Just kidding.

No, seriously...

Kidding. Kidding.

Let's go to the airport, my friend.

Hey listen, keep me

posted on that kid.

Let's go!

Airport. Big tip waiting.

Like a vulture circling fresh meat.

- Well he wants Downtown.

- He's not gonna wait.

He's gonna bring him up

before he's ready.

See, that's exactly what I've been saying.

You know how to bring a player along.

I need a manager with that kind of

touch, that kind of instinct.

I want you to take him to AAA.

I want you to teach him how to hit.

Sounds like a lot of work.

Try it for a couple of weeks.

You don't like it, no harm,

no foul. You quit.

- I need to think about it.

- Gus, I need a coach.

- Let you know in the morning?

- You're on.

- What if I hate it?

- You quit. He even gave you an out.

- Are you scared?

- No.

Yeah.

You can't let fear of the unknown

keep you moving off the dime.

What if Christopher Columbus had

let fear get in the way?

- I'd be playing Cricket.

- You know what I'm saying.

You really think I could

manage a baseball team?

I know you can.

What about us?

"Us" will be here.

"Us" isn't gonna go anywhere.

- You must be Gus Cantrell.

- What gave me away?

Frank Morgan, everybody calls me Pops.

Can I grab these? Come on, jump in.

- This is Mr. Buzz.

- Hi, how you doin'?

We're about an hour from gametime,

so I brought your uniform along.

We'll move Mr. Buzz' head up here.

Excuse me.

Watch your...

- You must be pretty excited.

- Oh yeah.

This is the clubhouse.

In some parts of the world

this is called a basement.

Good news is, it's cool in August.

Other times it can be a little musky.

- Dank?

- That too, but cool.

It's your office.

Another prayer unanswered.

Lance Pere.

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