Man-Proof Page #7

And never would be.

But in his not wanting

To be like that,

That made a difference.

And instead of hating him

For being ordinary,

I felt sorry for him,

Because I had on my hands

A very lonely man.

Well...

Being in love with him,

What was I to do?

I knew there'd be a parade

Of women,

Since he'd be trying

To find love someplace.

But to offset that,

They wouldn't have

Any of his heart,

Because he had none

To give them.

And in view of the fact

That he married me

Seemed to say

That he liked me better

Than any of the others.

It wasn't much to have,

But it was that much.

And added to all that,

It isn't everybody

Who can charm and amuse me.

So, I was going

To let it all ride.

But I - I wouldn't want alan

In love with another woman.

He wouldn't be very charming

Or very amusing

With a heavy heart.

So, now that he is in love

At last, I...

...I guess I had it pegged

All wrong.

And...

I think

I'll pass up that drink.

I don't think I'll be good

At being noble much longer.

Elizabeth...

Yes?

You're wrong about alan

And...

And his parade.

But you're first-class,

Elizabeth.

Wouldn't it be funny, mimi,

If alan got sick

And you and I

Went to the fights?

There goes a general

In any woman's army...

...even though she did lose.

The losers are always

The wisest, aren't they?

What, alan?

We might promote her

To a full general.

Alan, don't.

Dear, this had to happen.

Might even make her

An admiral.

Please.

It was best

To get it over with.

I never had

My portrait painted before.

Elizabeth's

The real artist.

All this time

I've been married,

I've been sitting

For my portrait

And didn't even know it.

Wait a minute.

I heard everything

She said, too,

And it hasn't changed anything

For us.

Nothing's gone.

We haven't lost anything.

And when the cards are called

As pretty as she called them,

There's nothing to do

But let them ride.

I had no idea of a divorce

When I came down here, mimi.

I wasn't even thinking of it.

I was excited, that's all.

But, alan.

She clocked it, mimi.

You were to be

In the parade.

Oh, right in front,

But in the parade nevertheless.

Then that charm of last night

Gets busy again, and...

You believed so strongly

That it was a great love

That, well,

I guess I caught a little

Of the high-powered magic

From you

And thought I was in love

At last.

That's what I thought,

Mimi.

That's what I thought.

And brooklyn

Was the garden of allah.

But it could be.

Alan, don't let's lose -

And then in comes

A wise guy

And holds a mirror

In front of my face,

And there I am...

Staring at myself

The way I really am.

Alan...

Let's have it all.

Don't stop there.

This between you and me -

It isn't just gone.

It just wasn't ever there.

That's what you're trying

To say, isn't it?

I guess that's it, mimi.

I'm afraid you're

A pretty lucky girl, mimi.

Sure.

Sure.

We're both lucky...

I guess.

Yeah.

Maybe I've got

Some luck left.

Alan...

Yeah?

You'd better go now.

Yes.

I'm a smart one,

All right.

Man, boy.

They never saw

Anything like me.

I was going to be

Modern and honest.

Streamlined, I was.

I was going to take you away

From elizabeth.

And all I did

Was tuck you both

In an old-fashioned four-poster

For the rest of your lives.

Who is it?

It's me.

Move over.

You've got a new member.

Is this a social call,

Or are you just out

Ringing doorbells?

Don't gag, jimmy.

Talk or shut up

Or go back to sleep.

I don't care.

But don't be smart.

I couldn't stand it.

You want a drink, mimi?

No, I don't want a drink.

I don't know what I want.

I wanted a bright new toy.

Well, I got it

For a moment...

Only it wasn't very bright.

It was dull...

And not worth having.

Well, why don't you say,

"I told you so"?

Go on - crow.

It might help.

Mimi, you know I never crow

Before daybreak.

Look, I was asleep.

I was minding

My own business.

I was dreaming

About a blonde.

She was rich, too.

I didn't come to see you.

You woke me up.

All right.

Fight with me.

Go on.

Make me sore.

At least

Make me feel something.

Oh, no, not me.

I tried to make you cry once,

And what did I get for it?

If you want to cry,

Go ahead.

You won't get

Any help from me.

That's just it.

I can't cry.

I'm empty and dry.

I've gone dead,

And I don't like it.

Jimmy, I'm frightened.

You're not dead.

You're just knocked out,

That's all.

You'll come to.

Oh, you know it all,

Don't you?

Dr. Kilmartin knows all,

Cures all.

Dr. Kilmartin's a quack.

He makes me sick.

Now, wait a minute.

Now, don't talk.

I'm sick of talk.

Just don't say anything.

That's great.

That's fine.

You wake me up

At 4:
00 in the morning

And tell me

Not to say anything.

Okay, you win.

I'm going back to sleep.

Thanks, jimmy.

Jimmy...

Yeah?

Get me out of here.

Get a car.

Hire it.

Steal it.

I don't care.

But get me out.

Well, what will we use

For money?

I've got some.

Give.

Okay.

Now you get out of here

While I put on my pants.

It's

The old kilmartin code -

Never put on your pants

In public.

And so,

He walked out of my life

And back into elizabeth's...

Leaving me with my memories.

As dismal a group

As I'd ever kept company with.

Feeling better?

Yes,

I'm feeling better, jimmy.

Good.

Well,

I have to hand it to you.

For once in your life,

You were right.

Remember what you said

About alan

That night

After the wedding at gus'?

Don't tell me

I said something.

Wait a minute.

That wasn't all you said,

Either.

You said you didn't think

Love was worth suffering for.

There was no such thing

As real love.

Just a lot of people

Trying to manufacture it.

Remember,

You said that, too?

Yeah.

And, jimmy,

You were right.

I know now

Why I fell for alan again.

You do?

I fell for him because I still

Wanted so much to be in love.

I didn't believe you,

Jimmy.

I mean, I'm hearing

For the first time

What you were talking

About that night.

Oh.

Came the dawn, huh?

You knew what was going on

All the time, didn't you?

Even way back then.

Well...

You had it

All figured out.

And that's good going, jimmy.

That's first-rate.

Sure.

I'm feeling fine now.

I feel like you feel.

I'm rid of

All that longing

For something

That really isn't there.

You sure?

I feel all friendly.

I like alan.

I like elizabeth.

I like you.

Come, come.

Now you're going too far.

No, I mean it, jimmy.

I like you especially.

You dismiss love.

Well...

But you don't laugh at it.

You're the best man

I know.

And if I'm lucky,

I'm going to be your friend.

You are?

Well, that suits me.

Yes.

I mean the kind of friends

That when we go out together

And you see somebody

Who strikes your fancy,

You go and grab her,

Walk out on me,

Just as if

I weren't there...

Just as if I were

One of the boys.

And if she gives you the go-by,

Well, there I am.

Okay?

I'll buy it.

And to prove it's a deal,

I'll cancel that 5 bucks

I owe you.

Hey, wait a minute.

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