Man About Town Page #6

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and your grandkids.

I am bone-marrow hungry

to be your agent.

That's it.

What do you think?

Ask him if he'll

represent an actress.

I want this guy

repping me, too.

Okay, fine.

You're my agent.

You're my agent.

Just get off my lawn

before the cops come.

Yes!

You're not gonna regret this.

Thank you. Thank you!

I'm very excited.

Very excited!

Jack, we need an explanation.

You need to come clean with us.

Listen, I can't let her

have that Journal.

This is the woman who's responsible

for the break-in at my house.

She can't have that Journal.

Why not? Why can't you let her

have the Journal, Jack?

What's in the Journal?

She's doing a story on me,

on the agency, our work, et cetera.

Oh, God.

And the Journal contains, you know,

it's private information.

But, other than that,

everything is fine.

And there's good news

regarding David Lilly.

What's in the Journal, Jack?

I'm taking care of it, okay?

Jack, what's in the Journal?

Information that directly

contradicts our testimony

at the competition trial...

as well as some personal stuff.

You know, my feelings

about the size of my dick

and stuff like that.

So, Barbi, as we

discussed on the phone,

we all wanted to

get together with you

to talk about the scripts

that you submitted.

Five years ago.

Please don't

take that personally.

We are looking at ways

of speeding up

our reading department.

As head of the future lit department,

I gotta tell you,

I really think you have

an incredible body of work.

- Really?

- Absolutely.

- Awesome.

- Wow, how nice.

Which one do you like the best?

Well, to be honest with you,

probably

Chinese Girl on a Killing SPree

would be my favorite.

Good one. Really edgy.

Planet Without Jews

was an interesting read.

Phenomenal.

Phenomenal.

- Wow, thank you.

- You're very talented.

Barbi, the point is,

we would love,

love to have you as a client.

A client?

Yes. Yes.

Yes, we would be honored.

- Absolutely.

- Thank you.

Which one of my scripts

was your favorite, Jack?

You read them all, right?

Every one of them.

Read them all.

How nice.

How does an agency work?

You take ten percent?

I'm Just curious.

Ten percent.

But, you know, really,

it's really whatever

you're comfortable with.

I read them on the shitter.

Excuse me?

Well, I was on the shitter,

taking a sh*t when

I read your scripts,

so I Just thought

it was appropriate.

Jack!

He is so silly.

Stop it.

- He's kidding.

- That's Jack humor.

Let's cut the sh*t, Barbi. Okay?

We want the Journal

and we want you to kill the story.

What do you want?

You mean you don't want

to sign me as a client?

No, of course we do.

Jack, come on.

Oh, for God's sake.

She knows we don't want

to sign her as a client.

Barbi, have you ever

been to the Laker game?

Have you ever

sat on the floor at the Laker game?

You have no interest

in my work, do you?

Well, it is tiresome.

You're all so pathetic.

Especially you, Jack.

I have you people by the short hairs

and you know it,

and you have no shot in hell

that I'm gonna kill this story.

Get your asses back

to your side of L.A.!

Well, that went well.

Come on, Dad.

Dad, what are you

doing in there?

I looked these fish

right in the eye,

and they looked back at me,

and they...

they see right through me!

They know who I am,

these fish.

Okay. Come on, Pop.

Let's get out. All right?

I treated your mother like garbage.

Yeah.

I should have been Just...

...nice.

But then, I was very hard

to live with back then.

Okay, Dad.

Come on, get out.

Okay. Come on, let's go to bed.

I don't look back on the

good times I had with Nina

as Nina and I.

I know we had them.

We had many.

But I remember them now

as if we were someone else,

characters in a book or a film

or a game of some kind.

Isn't this great?

Yeah, but Just wait!

A couple years up the road,

I'm gonna start screwing

all your clients.

Then you'll know great!

I don't have a clear memory

of when Nina and I were in love.

Babe, I told you, I don't

believe in therapists.

I've been there.

They're weasels.

They charge you an arm and a leg.

You know,

you spill your guts to them.

You tell them every little deep,

dark secret you have,

and then you spend your whole life

praying to God

you never run into 'em in public.

No.

If you screw my client

out of this picture,

I will ruin you.

I will smear this town

with your severed testicles. Okay?

You are nothing.

Do not cross me on this. Okay?

I'm hanging up now.

Because your response to my side

of the conversation is irrelevant.

Who was that?

Just a friend.

I gotta go. I'm late.

Dooley. Pack your sh*t.

You're fired.

Excuse me?

You want his Job?

Yeah, sure.

All right, Dooley!

You're sitting at

the man's desk! Get up!

Get up, get up, get up

and get the f*** out!

All right, Jack.

Before you go in there,

there's someone in your office.

I set this up,

so if you want to be upset,

be upset with me,

but the two of you

need to talk face to face.

You're a piece of work,

Morty, you know that?

- Jack.

- Is it all about business with you?

Is that the only thing that matters

after all these years?

I mean, can't you see

how lost I am right now?

Just trust me, Jack.

The two of you need to talk.

Fine. I'll talk to him.

Good.

Morty told me about

the woman in Chinatown...

and about the Journal.

I've seen you writing in it.

If you really loved me,

no matter what I did,

no matter what

we were going through,

you would not have

done what you did.

Okay, you're right.

I'm human. I'm flawed.

I'm a flawed piece of sh*t, Jack.

Is that what you want to hear?

Do you want to hear me beg?

'Cause I will. I'll beg.

It's not in my nature, but I'll do it.

I'll beg.

I'm asking for forgiveness.

I'm asking you to somehow...

Iook inside yourself and...

find the place that

will allow you to focus

on all the incredible good

that's happened between us.

If you really love me,

then why is that

so goddamn hard?

Get out.

You okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

All right, well,

put your game face on.

David Lilly and his wife

are on their way up.

I'm going up.

No. Let's be smarter than this.

I want to get more on him.

He's in pain, this one.

The more I read this thing,

the more I see that.

He's gonna do

something stupid,

and I want to be there

when he does.

I'm gonna have him in pain for you.

Baby...

Sorry. Please.

Hold on.

Hide yourself.

Please hide.

This sucks.

Nina! Nina Giamoro!

Hello.

My name is Barbi Ling.

I'm doing an article

on your husband.

I was wondering if I could

have ten minutes with you

for some background stuff.

Do you think we could go somewhere

and get a cup of coffee?

Does my husband know

about this article?

Yeah, he does.

He knows.

Okay, sure.

Yeah, I'll give you your ten minutes.

Why don't we go upstairs

to the conference room?

- Upstairs? No. L...

- I'll tell you what.

I'll give you twenty minutes

of some very good stuff.

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