Man of the World Page #4

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My dear Irene, armed with

nothing but my trusty fountain pen

and galley proofs,

I stalked Mr. Taylor to his lair

and bagged this.

Too bad you can't

have checks stuffed

and hung above the fireplace.

Did he make any fuss?

Fuss?

He almost kissed me.

As a matter of fact,

I'm a friend of the family now.

Guess where I've been.

At the Ritz bar.

No.

Well, then I can't guess.

Dining with Taylor's niece

and her young man.

Oh, that's the people

you were with at Papa Jules's.

You mean you met the girl?

His niece?

Exactly.

Well, we are lucky.

Say, that couple of pennies

that Taylor gave you is nothing at all

compared to what we can get.

Say, if he came across that easy

to keep his own name

out of the papers,

what do you suppose

he'd be willing to part with

for his dear little niece?

You know, when I was getting the dope

on them, I had a feeling we were blowing

into the wrong end of the horn.

Now I know it.

Here's a chance

to make a real killing.

You just give that dame the works

and see how quick her uncle

will come across.

I tell you.

It's money from home.

That's what it is.

Taking money from women

isn't in my line.

It never has been, and you know it.

Oh, it's not as if

you'd really hurt anybody.

Gee. The girl doesn't

have to know anything about it.

You just put her in a spot

where it'll look bad for her

if she gets found out, and...

her uncle will take care of the rest.

Yes. I know the mechanics

of the business.

Well, maybe you don't know this:

I've got to have some money,

and I've got to have it quick.

You're a fine, great big protector

of womanhood.

Only little Irenie doesn't matter.

That isn't true.

I'm not the type to put on

a sob act, Michael.

But if I tell you I've got to have it,

that there's no other chance

of keeping them from sending

my brother to the jug back home,

you'll believe me.

I've never lied to you yet, Michael.

This is the first time

I've ever asked you to break

that funny little rule of yours.

Oh, it's been all over

between us for a long time, I know,

but what do you say?

For me? For old time's sake.

I need the dough

like I never needed it before.

lrene, you know I'd do

anything I could for you--

We could all use the dough.

That's the one argument

I can never get around.

"We could all use the dough."

Okay. But first, last and only.

Great!

Anything you want me to do?

No. I can handle this alone.

Say, what's been

getting into you lately?

I don't know.

I wish I did.

Well, I'll tell you,

if you want to know.

You've been getting ideas.

You've been doing everything

but wearing a plume in your hat.

The first thing I know,

you'll be helping old ladies

across the street.

I used to help a Mrs. Allison

across the street on account of her age.

She was old, you see.

You'd better snap out of it.

You've been playing Robin Hood so long,

you're beginning to believe in it yourself.

Well, if that's all

that's on your mind--

Yes. That's all.

If I think of anything else,

I'll send word by special messenger.

Come on, Fred.

Maybe we can find someplace

where there aren't so many books.

Maybe there'll be

a few glasses in sight.

I'm going home.

You're going to buy Irenie

a little nightcap before you do.

I know better

than to argue with you.

I wish I could say as much

for everybody in this room.

So long, Mr. Trevor.

See you later.

French or not French,

they look just like any other horses to me.

Oh.

You mean to say that you, uh, don't find

even a trace of that je ne sais quoi

for which France is so famous?

Not a jenny.

Anyway, I didn't come to Paris

to look at horses.

There's plenty of horses back home

if I want to look at 'em.

But these are champions, Uncle Harry.

Well, I've seen champions before.

They're no treat to me.

Say, how about going back to the bar

and having another one of those

funny little green drinks?

Ah, yes. If you wish.

If I had my wish about this party,

we'd never have left the bar

in the first place.

The idea of spending

a lovely afternoon like this

looking at horses.

But it keeps you out

in the open air, Uncle Harry.

Well, I had all the open air

I wanted back home.

Hello, Mr. Trevor.

Hello. How are you?

Fine. And you?

Fred, you don't mean to tell me

you're showing Miss Harper the town?

Well, not exactly. There was a trainer

down here in the paddock she didn't know.

So I said I'd introduce her to him.

Ah. I see. Oh, allow me.

Uh, Miss Kendall,

uh, Miss Harper.

How do you do?

Uh, Mr. Taylor, Miss Harper.

Miss Harper has been one of

the shining ornaments of our little colony

here in Paris for several years.

Oh, excuse me, Fred.

Fred is the best

American guide in Paris.

You're just the fellow I want to see.

Let me tell you something, mister.

There's a fortune waiting for any guide who

don't know anything about monuments,

painting, historical edifices or--

A pen picture of Fred

if ever I heard one.

You've been doing pretty well

dodging monuments and paintings,

Uncle Harry, without a guide.

Well, as I remember the old U.S.A.,

there's plenty of monuments

right there.

You're terrible, Uncle Harry.

Not terrible.Just honest.

Most of the time

it's the same thing.

Well, to be perfectly honest,

would you think it terrible

if I were to suggest a little drink?

My error.

I'll join you folks later.

Uh, don't send out an alarm for me

until I've been lost for at least 1 0 days.

Well, uh--

Ah.

Well, so long, Mr. Trevor.

I got some customers I gotta take

to the Louvre.

I should think you would know

those pictures pretty well by now.

Oh, I don't look at 'em, Mr. Trevor.

I just explain 'em.

Uh--

I didn't dare suggest it

while your uncle was here,

but, uh,

what about seeing something

of the race?

What an old-fashioned idea.

Let's try it.

Let's.

I think you can

catch it better through here.

Thank you.

See if they're set right.

Yes.

Oh, yes. Watch that number 1 1.

Beautiful thing, isn't it?

Oh, I hope he wins.

He won! He won!

Who won what?

The man with the black

and gold cap.

Did you bet anything on him?

No.

Then what are you getting

so excited about?

There's thousands of races

won every day someplace.

I don't figure it's sensible to get excited

about horses unless you win something.

Why don't you give me

something so I can win?

Well, what did you do with

that money I gave you yesterday?

I spent it.

Putting your heart

in your work, aren't you?

Now I guess we can go back to the bar

and get one of those funny-colored drinks.

Oh, Mary can stay here with Mr. Trevor

for the next race if she wants to.

The sun hurts my eyes.

I'm sure Mr. Trevor would

rather remain here, wouldn't he?

If I must answer

yes or no, yes.

We'll be back in a couple of minutes.

Oh, Mr. Trevor, I'm afraid I'll have to

renege on that opera tonight.

But that Russian's

going to conduct.

Oh, I didn't mean I didn't want you to go.

No, I really think you ought to go.

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