Manhattan Page #6

"I do a lot of terrible things

but I can also make one of these."

And Job would've said "OK, you win."

Look, this is crazy. I just can't do

this any more. It's really bullshit!

You're married and

I expected to see you this weekend...

...and I sit around like

I've nothing to do, so I called Isaac.

We went for a walk.

- It was just lucky he was free.

- I know. I'm sorry.

Oh, it's not your fault.

What the hell. It's a no-win situation.

It's just I'm beautiful and I'm bright

and I deserve better!

I know.

- What if I took some action?

- No!

Oh. I'm not a home wrecker.

I don't know how I got into this.

I guess we met at the wrong time.

It happens. Hello?

Oh, hi. Oh, hi, Harvey. How are you?

Uh, what?

Well, um, why don't you bring it by

on Thursday and I'll read it then, OK?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, OK. Right, I'll talk

to you later. OK, bye-bye.

- What d'you want me to do?

- Waffles. Nothing. It's just...

Waffles! Will you stop that now?

We're just going no place. Excuse me.

Look, I know it's terrible.

I'm at Sneedon's Landing

with Emily and her parents...

...and I love her!

And I'm thinking about you all the time.

Christ. I don't wanna hear it.

I'm from Philadelphia.

My family's never had affairs.

My parents have been married 43 years.

Nobody cheats at all. Hello?

Oh, Donny. Hi!

it's my analyst.

Hello. Uh...

Um, no, uh... Well, I think

that'd be impossible. Uh...

OK, well, probably later in the week.

OK, all right.

I'll get back to you. OK, bye.

Oh, man. Waffles!

Please, just don't. This is really a bad

time... Waffles! ...A bad time for me.

I gotta think things through here.

- Obviously I shouldn't have come here.

- Well, no, probably not.

Listen to that! How am I gonna...?

What is that sound? Can you hear that?

Listen. Where's it coming from?

It's like somebody's

playing the trumpet.

Or somebody sawing... Like a man

sawing a trumpet in half. Right? Right?

- Let's fool around.

- You hear it?

It'll take your mind off it.

How many times a night...? How often

can you make love in an evening?

- Well, a lot.

- Yeah, I can tell. A lot. That's...

Well, a lot is my favorite number.

Gee, really? Can you?

Let's do it some strange way

you've always wanted to do...

...but nobody would do with you.

I'm shocked. What kind of talk

is that from a kid your age?

I'll get my scuba-diving equipment

and really show you...

- Take me seriously!

- I do take you seriously, but...

Listen to this.

Am I crazy? Wha...? Ah!

It's a rumbling.

Listen to that goddamn...

Where the hell is that coming from?

- It's probably just the elevator shaft.

- It's not. It's coming from the walls.

Let's... Let's...

Can we check into a hotel?

- Oh, you're crazy!

- I can't sleep here. I can't.

Where's the aspirin? What d'you do...

I can help you fix this place up,

if you give me a chance.

No, and I don't want you living here.

Tonight is a special occasion.

It's my first night in the apartment...

...so I wanted to break in the place

and I was afraid to sleep alone.

Hey, what is this?

There's brown water!

- The pipes are rusty.

- What is this, Tracy?

- The pipes are rusty.

- Look at this. It's brown water.

I'm paying $700 a month.

I got rats with bongos and a frog.

And I got brown water here.

- Look. It's disgusting.

- What's gonna happen to us?

Listen. You keep ignoring me.

What's gonna happen with us?

What do you mean?

D'you have a good time with me?

- Aren't I a load of laughs and fun?

- Yes.

So, and that's it, and we have fun.

Then you're gonna go to London

exactly as we discussed it.

You're gonna take advantage of that

opportunity and study acting over there.

And you'll think of me always

as a fond memory. It'll be nice.

You know we have to

stop seeing each other?

Oh, yeah. Right, right.

I understand. I could tell by

the sound of your voice over the phone.

Very authoritative, you know.

Like the Pope or the computer in 2001.

It's not fair to you

and I don't know what I'm doing.

- Right.

- I mean... Come on, don't be angry.

You brought this up. You're not happy

the way things are going.

I'm not angry.

It's just I knew it was gonna end,

but now it's happened I'm upset, OK?

Look, you don't wanna

make a commitment.

And I don't wanna break up my marriage

and then find out

we're no good together.

I've gotta start thinking about Emily.

OK, you made your point very clear.

I'm just glad one of us

had the nerve to end it.

- Will you be all right?

- Yeah...

Of course I will. What d'you think

I'm gonna do? Hang myself?

I'm a beautiful woman.

I'm young, highly intelligent.

I got everything going for me.

The point...

The point is that... I don't know,

I'm all f***ed up. I'm just... Sh*t!

What am I doing in this relationship

anyway? My phone never stops ringing.

I could go to bed with the entire

faculty of MIT, if I wanted to.

It's just...

I don't know. I'm wasting myself

on a married man, so I don't know.

Listen, I think I'd better go now.

I just want you to have this.

I got these tickets

to see Rampal tonight.

Oh, Mary. This is very hard on me, too.

Please! Just take them

and go with your wife.

Mary, you love Rampal.

Call somebody up. Take Isaac.

F*** off, Yale!

Um, I know you're gonna think

the water's a little brown,

but you can drink it.

Don't get thrown by this.

- I'm really sorry for bothering you.

- No problem.

It's just...

- God, this is brown, isn't it?

- It is, but you get used to it.

I didn't know who to call.

I don't think you should take Valium.

It causes cancer.

- No. Half a Valium?

- Yeah, abdominal cancer, I think.

When did they find that out?

That's just my theory, but I think

it's correct. I got tissues someplace.

Well, I guess

I deserve everything I get.

Come on.

It's true. It's really true. I mean,

I knew it couldn't possibly work out.

Yeah, you pick a married guy...

...and when it doesn't work out,

it confirms your worst feelings.

What worst feelings?

You know. Your feelings about men

and marriage and that nothing works.

Oh, please, don't psychoanalyze me.

I pay a doctor for that.

Hey. You call that guy

that you talk to a doctor?

You don't get suspicious when he calls

you at 3am and weeps into the telephone?

So he's unorthodox.

He's a highly qualified doctor.

He's done a great job on you.

Your self-esteem is like

a notch below Kafka's.

What is that noise?

Yeah. Incredible, isn't it?

There's a guy upstairs.

I don't know what the hell it is.

It's like he's up there strangling a

parrot or something. I can't stand it.

How can you stand it? It's terrible.

I know.

I used to have a great apartment.

- Wanna go for a walk? It's quieter out.

- No, I think I'll just go home.

No, come on.

He led me on! That's the point of it.

Why am I reluctant to criticize him?

Relax. Yale would not do that.

He's not that kind of a guy.

Don't defend him.

You guys all stick up for each other.

Yale has his problems as we all do.

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