Maverick Page #14

JOSEPH:

(miserable)

That's not it --Bret, I don't

have the thousand I owe you --I

don't have the money. He has to

change rubles to dollars.

MAVERICK:

is really upset.

(CONTINUED)

MAVERICK -Rev. 11/15/93 80. *

77 77

CONTINUED:

MAVERICK:

When?

(shaking his head)

Now I've got to win three thousand

the next couple of days to get the

damn twenty-five thousand entrance

fee.

JOSEPH:

You're in the big game?

JOSEPH:

You've got twenty-two thousand?

(off Maverick's nod)

Cash?

MAVERICK:

Not frog skins.

JOSEPH:

I've never seen that much -where

is it, can I see it?

On that -

Maverick's saddlebag as he goes to it, opens it, takes

out his leather drawstring bag -

--Joseph is excited watching.

Maverick opens the bag -

JOSEPH:

Ha ha.

--after which he goes into shock --the bag is filled

with rolled-up Sears catalog paper. (Lots of AD LIBS.)

MAVERICK:

That rotten Annabelle -

(big)

--how could she rob me when I was

going to face my doom? I could

shoot her. --I will.

(drops the now-empty

bag --deep gloom

has descended)

I'm never gonna make it to that

tournament... I'm a dead man.

JOSEPH:

Goldilocks?

(commiserating)

You're a dead man.

(CONTINUED)

MAVERICK -Rev. 11/15/93 81. *

77 CONTINUED:
(2) 77

Exactly.

MAVERICK:

I'm a dead man.

JOSEPH:

And now the thing you least expect: a smile.

JOSEPH:

No, you really are a dead man.

Listen to me...

As Maverick looks at him as if he were crazy -78

OMITTED 78

79 EXT. MEADOW/STREAM -JOSEPH -NEXT AFTERNOON 79

riding his magnificent horse at full gallop through a

stream. A couple of braves alongside him.

PULL BACK to reveal...

A number of tents all of them surrounding something we

hadn't expected to see: a large custom wagon (an 1870

motor home).

It rests in the middle of a meadow.

80 EXT. ARCHDUKE'S MOTORHOME -DAY 80

Near the wagon as Joseph arrives. It is ornate, filled

with artwork of all kinds, clearly Russian in origin.

An ARTIST, VILMOS, is painting. The Archduke comes out.

ARCHDUKE:

Where's the waterfall?

VILMOS:

I make nature more beautiful.

He's the kind of guy if he wasn't so rich and powerful,

you'd want to clobber. Spoiled beyond belief, the product

of decades of inbreeding, he is reminiscent of Peter

Ustinov in Quo Vadis when he played Nero.

JOSEPH:

Look at his big a**hole.

(speaking in

flawless French

SUBTITLED)

Good afternoon. I hope His

Majesty has had a happy day.

(CONTINUED)

MAVERICK -Rev. 11/15/93 82. *

80 80

CONTINUED:

ARCHDUKE:

(in flawless French

too --SUBTITLED)

I know you were taught by

missionaries but I hate it when

you speak that way --it simply

isn't authentic. Now do it right.

JOSEPH:

(raising his right

hand)

How, white man.

ARCHDUKE:

(English now)

Hello, Noble Savage --I've had a

terrible day. I've killed every

animal in sight and it's boring

me.

JOSEPH:

("too easy")

Maybe his largeness be interested

in greatest western thrill of all.

ARCHDUKE:

Greatest western thrill? What is

it? What?

JOSEPH:

(motions him to

come around)

Come.

The Archduke and Joseph join at the wagon.

ARCHDUKE:

What is greater thrill?

JOSEPH:

Kill Injun.

ARCHDUKE:

Staggered.

ARCHDUKE:

Kill... are you crazy? No... No...

Oh, I couldn't possibly... is

that legal here?

(CONTINUED)

MAVERICK -Rev. 11/15/93 83. *

80 CONTINUED:
(2) 80

JOSEPH:

If no one find out, very legal.

Besides, white man has been doing

it for years.

(beat)

Much wampum needed.

ARCHDUKE:

(into it now)

I've never shot anyone before.

JOSEPH:

Now's your big chance.

How much?

ARCHDUKE:

JOSEPH:

Five... thousand dollars.

ARCHDUKE:

Would we have to tie him up?

doesn't seem sporting.

That

JOSEPH:

Him loose. But easy hit. Dying

anyway. Put out of misery. Much

pain.

Deal.

ARCHDUKE:

Deal.

JOSEPH:

Now, as the Archduke starts to get excited -81

EXT. BURNED-OUT FOREST -AFTERNOON 81

Later in the afternoon.

Maverick, magnificently painted to look like an Indian,

stands alone. From a distance, in point of fact, he

actually looks like an Indian. Now, at the sound of

horses, he bends over, groaning, his hands across his

stomach as we...

JOSEPH AND ARCHDUKE

Joseph holds his giant bow and arrow, the Archduke his

hunting rifle.

(CONTINUED)

MAVERICK -Rev. 11/15/93 84. *

81 81

CONTINUED:

JOSEPH:

Me go give him courage.

(as the Archduke

starts with him)

No --Indian law say death be

private. You wait here.

The Archduke nods. Joseph goes to look for Maverick.

We see Maverick with all his Indian makeup on.

MAVERICK:

Hey.

JOSEPH:

Bret?

MAVERICK:

Who else? Did you fix his gun?

JOSEPH:

Couldn't --he never let it out of

his hands.

MAVERICK:

--what's in it for me if I die?

JOSEPH:

I got him up to five hundred

dollars.

MAVERICK:

Worth the risk. Okay. Let's go.

JOSEPH:

250 apiece.

MAVERICK:

250? I'm taking all the risk.

What do you need 250 for?

JOSEPH:

Hey, that's my lucky shirt.

MAVERICK:

Why don't you ever wash it? It

stinks.

JOSEPH:

You wash all the luck out of it.

MAVERICK:

You got a point.

(CONTINUED)

MAVERICK -Rev. 11/15/93 85. *

81 CONTINUED:
(2)

JOSEPH:

(calls to Archduke)

Soo... Archduke.

The Archduke comes to him.

JOSEPH:

Look sick.

ARCHDUKE:

Tell him to start running.

Maverick leaves. The Archduke raises his gun.

JOSEPH:

(moving into the

line of fire -shouting)

No --no --no --wrong.

ARCHDUKE:

(as Joseph runs up)

What's wrong? -(

gesturing toward

the sky)

I don't want to lose the light.

JOSEPH:

Injun shot by white man's weapon

never reach happy hunting ground.

(handing over his

bow and arrow)

Injun must die Injun way.

ARCHDUKE:

(grumpily exchanges

weapons)

I've never used one of these.

JOSEPH:

Easy.

MAVERICK:

sort of limping along.

ARCHDUKE:

Aiming the bow and arrow.

MAVERICK:

limping on, groaning brilliantly.

(CONTINUED)

MAVERICK -Rev. 11/15/93 86. *

81 CONTINUED:
(3)

ARCHDUKE:

Maverick dead in his sights now -

--and he FIRES -

--and he misses --the ARROW THUDDING into a tree next

to him.

--and he stings his hand like hell. He cries out,

shakes his hand.

Maverick reacts --tosses his stick and runs.

Maverick tears through the forest.

JOSEPH:

Not bad.

(to Maverick in

Indian)

Not so fast.

(in English)

You lucky...

ARCHDUKE:

(throwing the bow

down, taking his

rifle)

No wonder you people were so easy

to conquer.

JOSEPH:

(moving in front of

the rifle)

Two thousand dollars.

ARCHDUKE:

Two thousand. You don't think

he'll mind missing Heaven?

JOSEPH:

Not if you shoot fast -

And on that they step.

ARCHDUKE:

ONE SHOT RINGS OUT and...

MAVERICK:

screaming in pain, his hands go to his heart. He staggers

once, falls.

(CONTINUED)

MAVERICK -Rev. 11/15/93 87. *

81 CONTINUED:
(4) 81

JOSEPH AND ARCHDUKE

ARCHDUKE:

(thrilled)

I killed him. I really killed

him. Can we do this again

tomorrow?

JOSEPH:

(shakes his head)

No rest of tribe healthy.

back in winter.

Come

ARCHDUKE:

(on his horse now)

You're just going to leave him for

the vultures?

JOSEPH:

Never liked him much anyway.

Come, we get the money.

The Archduke walks. Joseph does bird call.

calls back and sneaks a look.

Maverick

82 EXT. INDIAN VILLAGE -DUSK 82

Maverick is finishing removing his paint as Joseph rides

up. Evening now. Fires all over.

Partner.

JOSEPH:

We did it.

MAVERICK:

Get away from me you SOB.

could have killed me.

He

JOSEPH:

We had to make it look real.

(handing bow and

arrow)

Fire. Shoot it. Go on. I

saved your life.

Maverick does --same as with the Archduke it hurts.

JOSEPH:

Hurts, doesn't it? The Archduke's

finger was so sore he couldn't

shoot anything.

(hands 50)

Fresh from the mint. You earned

it.

(CONTINUED)

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