Meet the Browns Page #5

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Come on, Mike.

All right. Night, baby.

- Good night.

- Night.

- Night.

- Later, Mike.

Brenda, he seems like

such a nice young man.

Thank you. He is.

I couldn't make it without him.

You know what? Now just a minute,

just a minute.

I'm just curious. Anybody else at this

table want to know who this woman is?

- Vera!

- All day y'all been skirting the issue.

I want to know

who this woman is.

- Mama...

- No no, uh uh uh uh!

Who are you?

Well, um...

apparently Pop Brown

was my daddy.

- What?

- Huh-uh, you's a liar.

Apparently nothing.

You a liar!

Huh-uh, the devil is a liar.

Oh, hell to the no.

My daddy wasn't no rolling stone.

Well, that's what

my mama said.

- Who's your mama?

- Her name was Carol Cassidy.

I don't know no Cassidy.

Who's that?

I ain't got no reason

not to tell the truth.

W-wait a minute.

I got something.

Yeah, let's see what you got.

Look at her.

She does look just like us.

Look, I'm the baby of this family.

She ain't coming up in here.

All that attitude and carrying on.

"We're from Chicago."

What you got, girl?

I got this letter and it

told me to come down here.

Let me see this.

It's L.B.'s writing.

- L.B., what the hell is this?

- L. B?

- What the hell is it?

- What's going on, L. B?

- Yeah, L.B., what's going on?

- I know all about this.

Papa Brown been talking

to you about her?

Yes, her and her mother.

You see, when Pop Brown

got real sick,

he started to tell me everything

about his past life.

You know, before he got saved

and became a deacon.

So you mean to tell me...

you have a sister?

Yep, and her mother

was the love of his life

in Chicago.

Oh, really?

- Mm-hmm, yeah.

- Huh-uh-uh!

'Cause I don't agree.

What are you saying?

You see, when Pop Brown

was in Chicago,

he was a pimp.

And her mother was

his bottom ho.

You don't talk

about my daddy.

Hell to the no,

this is blasphemy.

L.B., you don't talk about my daddy

like this, not at the dinner table.

- Our daddy was a saint.

- Your daddy was a pimp!

He was not a pim... my daddy

used to date nice women.

- Remember sweet Sadie?

- Yes.

- Good girl.

- She was one of his whores.

- Ho ho.

- What about Agnes with the freckles?

She was a good girl... Agnes.

Freckle-faced ho.

What about Arnette?

- Latin ho.

- What about Tommy Lee?

- Backdoor whore.

- What about Shirley?

Shirley, the one that used to make

cupcakes for me when I was a child.

Please don't tell me Shirley was no ho.

What about Shirley?

- City ho.

- Miss Edna?

She's a double ho.

What about L.B. mama?

L. B?

Nasty ho.

Ain't nothing going

on here but the truth.

Brenda, you sure you okay?

Oh yeah. I'll be fine.

But it's a good thing

this funeral's tomorrow

- so I can get out of here.

- Let me welcome you to the Brown family.

- Some welcome.

- I know it.

This is getting pretty full.

I should take it out.

Oh, okay. You sure

you want to do that?

- Yeah, where?

- Just take it right out front.

Ladies, I'm gonna say

good night.

- Well, good night.

- Nice meeting you.

Nice meeting you too.

- Hey, let me help you with that.

- Oh, I got it.

Around here men do that.

Where I'm from women do it all.

Well, then maybe

you should live here.

God forbid.

What?

What's wrong with my town?

- You call this a town?

- Yeah.

It's calming.

It's too quiet here.

Then maybe you should let me

show you how great a town it is.

You know, I'm here for my father's funeral

and you're flirting with me.

That is in poor taste.

- Yeah.

- I'm sorry.

Good night.

Good night.

Well, we are here today to say

- goodbye...

- Lord, that's my daddy!

...to one of our dear

beloved sons.

Daddy, you should've

let me go with you!

Daddy!

Mom, Mom, take it easy.

Sit down, Mom.

And I need you to understand

that God will see you

through all this, sister.

What the hell does

he got on his head?

- And you must realize that...

- Monster, Mama, monster.

- Baby, it's all right.

...in this hour of bereavement,

there is such

a word as comfort.

Yeah, Southern Comfort!

Yes, sir!

- Hmph.

- And God is faithful

- to do exactly what he says he's gonna do.

- Preacher? Excuse me, Pastor?

He do, He do!

Psst!

- l...

- Put me on the program.

I wanted to say something

about my daddy.

- Don't, please.

- You can put me on program.

I'm trying to do

the sermon, please.

- I'm preaching right now.

- You ain't doing no...

you ain't doing no good job.

You're boring everybody.

Look at my daddy's face.

Deacon, he dead.

- Put me on the program.

- I need to finish my sermon.

- Remember that...

- Psst!

You can let me say something

about my daddy. He my daddy.

- Is he your daddy? Act like he your daddy.

- All right.

- Just put me on the program.

- Come on.

- Oh, Daddy!

- All right.

Now I have more to say,

but right now

his son Leroy Brown

has a few words

that he wants to say.

Leroy Brown, come on

and say something

right up on that.

- Me?

- Oh yes.

- What?

- Let's go. Come on now.

- Shut your mouth. Is he sure?

- Yes, Deacon.

- They want me to say something?

- Come on up here, Deacon.

I don't know what to say.

You want me to say

something, L. B?

- Till we all dead.

- Okay.

I'm "nerveless."

I didn't plan on saying

nothing today.

I just was in my room and I

jotted down a few things.

- Can y'all hear me?

- Go on, Brown. Go on, baby.

Is this on?

It's on.

I didn't plan on saying nothing.

Let the church say "amend."

- Amen.

- Let the church say "amend" again.

Amen.

I want to let everybody know

today that Daddy died happy.

He was happy...

I'm gonna miss my daddy.

Bye-bye, Daddy.

My daddy loved his people...

I'm getting sick of this. It don't take nobody

that long to put nobody in the ground.

- Stay calm, stay calm.

- I am calm. I'm just sick of it.

He'll always be right here, y'all,

right here in my heart.

And I won't chatter no...

this ain't no funeral.

- This is a "celebrate."

- Yeah!

And we here to celebrate Daddy.

And I'm telling y'all today,

- my daddy was a happy man.

- Sit down!

- That's what we need...

- Sit down, Brown!

- more superheroes in this church.

We need peoples

that'll stand up and be

heroes for the Lord.

- That's enough.

- Show him, baby.

Oh God.

I gotta stop smoking.

# Amazing #

# Gra-a-a-ace #

# How sweet, yes #

# The sound... #

One more time, Sarah.

She got one more time.

Jesus, why?

Tell me why?

That's it. Vera's really getting

on my nerves.

# That saves... #

# A wre-eeee-etch #

# Like me-eee... #

- Uncle L. B!

- L.B., what's wrong with you?

You wanna go with her?

There's room for you too, you know?

I'll wait.

I'm the baby of this family

and I deserve some respect.

- Right.

- L.B. pushed me in that grave.

I know, Mama. I know.

Everybody's act a fool.

Should have let them put the dirt

on you too... acting a damn fool.

- Calm down, everybody.

- That's just crazy!

Uh, hey, y'all.

It was nice meeting

all of you, but, um...

- I think we're gonna go now.

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