Minutemen

---

Solid.

Scorch.

First day of high school, Virg.

We made the big time.

Football games, free periods...

the chicks.

- Derek? You have a bat in the cave.

- Huh?

Boogie fever.

And that was just a test.

Had it been an actual emergency...

- Oh, hey, hey.

- Aww...

Their first high school fight!

My boys are growing up so fast.

- Where does the time go?

- Who cares about the past?

- I'm thinking about my social future.

- Well, I don't want anything to change.

I've got my two best guys

right here, right now.

I'm your favorite though? You can

admit it. He's man enough to take it.

I still can't believe you talked

me into trying out for cheerleading.

You'll do fine.

It's him I'm worried about.

He's in full freak mode

about football tryouts.

Don't worry, I'll be there

for moral support.

- You mean to goof around?

- Exactly.

This is serious.

You better not embarrass me.

D-rock, I never try to embarrass you.

It just works out that way.

But first, a little boom-bah.

Relax, Beaugard.

Be the ball, be the ball.

What's up with that?

I'll see you guys later.

- OK, that's enough for today.

- No! Wait! I can do this.

Bro, maybe you ought to rest your arm.

What is that?

Coming through! Whoa!

Coming through! I can't control it!

I'm really sorry! Look out!

Whoa!

I'm sorry! Excuse me!

He's chewing up my field!

- Isn't that your neighbor?

- Charlie Tuttle.

This kid in our class

who's nine years old.

He skipped a bunch of grades

because he's a genius.

Oh, yeah. A real Einstein.

Get off my field right now!

Stupid dork's going down.

What are you doing? He's going away.

Just ignore him.

Oh!

Now that's some accuracy.

Little baby.

Come on, give him a break.

Whoa, whoa! Hey, hey!

Hey, come on!

Hey, Derek?

Derek, if you wanna jump in,

that's cool.

Derek?

Put me down!

Put me down!

- Good throw! All right, Derek!

- Nice shot!

Thanks for sticking up for me.

I'm sorry about how it turned out.

Please tell me I don't look

as ridiculous as you do.

It's not that bad, really.

That's a... that's a nice red on you.

- I'm Charlie Tuttle.

- Virgil Fox.

Nice to meet you.

So, what's the story

with that rocket cart thing?

I always get a hard time on the bus

and I hypothesized

a rocket-propulsion all-terrain cart

would help avoid embarrassment.

Uh-huh. And how's that

working out for you?

It's working great!

My emotion modulator

actually allows me to understand

what Albert Felinestein is trying to

communicate with his various meows!

Isn't that amazing?

Virgil? Hey! Earth to Virgil.

Virg! Don't you think, Virgil?

Virgil? Aren't you excited?

Yes, Charlie, I'm thrilled

that you talk to your cat.

Um, I'm not entirely certain, but I

believe you may be employing sarcasm.

Charlie, what do you want from me?

Your inventions always work.

I can only act so surprised

every time you figure out

how to power your house

with tartar sauce.

It's cocktail sauce.

You know what would make me happy?

If you built something useful.

By useful, I mean something that

would make me rich and popular. Or both.

Hey, you can't

ride that thing on the...

Hey, great bike. Lots of shiny,

chrome, gear-y things.

Did you know that the contents of

pudding actually makes you grow taller?

- It does.

- That's why you're so tall.

It's the electrolytes

and everything.

Thumbs down... and go!

Yes! I win!

Senior year and I'm still

eating at the dork table.

No offense, guys. I do enjoy

the stimulating conversation.

Hey, none taken.

But seriously, how did it come to this?

Let's see, maybe your plight

has something to do with

being stripped, dressed in mini skirts,

and hung from the school mascot.

A picture made the cover

of the yearbook. Three years in a row.

- And on all the local news stations.

- And the Spanish Channel.

Ah yes, the incident

I will one day be explaining

to a very expensive therapist.

Hey, Hummingbird.

That's Charlie speak for 'hello.'

Um, excuse me, miss.

Why did you call him 'Hummingbird?'

Oh, I love birds. All kinds of birds.

Big birds, little birds.

I'm even the official secretary

for the local chapter of the Junior

Bird Buddies of America. Such an honor!

Anyway, gotta run.

Fix that.

Well, that explains it.

Jeanette has been sweating you

for two years. What's your deal?

Forget it. I'm married to science.

Hey, congratulations, buddy.

Pardon me, gents.

Ah, soda.

I hear if you leave a penny in that

stuff for a week it comes out shiny?

I was actually planning on drinking it.

Well, never mind then.

So, um, how are you, Virg?

I didn't see you much this summer.

Oh, you know, I was doing a lot of

mountain climbing, jet skiing...

- Video games?

- I didn't leave the couch. You?

The usual, pool parties,

cheerleading camp.

But I did take this awesome

architecture class.

Oh, that's cool.

I remember you made a gingerbread house

that had ten rooms...

- And walk-in cIosets.

- Took us six months to eat it.

Oh, well...

Well, I have calculus. Hate it. Need it.

Can't be an architect without it.

I got Public Speaking.

Hate it. Need it.

Can't be a game show host without it.

There's a good reason Tesla's biographer

There's a good reason Tesla's biographer

named his book

A Man Out of Time.

Tesla was so far advanced

over his contemporaries,

that they often derided...

...they often

derided him as...

Miss...

Jocelyn, is it too much to ask that

you not do your nails while I lecture?

Sorry.

When are you done?

- Excuse me.

- Ah, Mr. Tuttle.

I believe you're here for

your booster chair.

I'll get it later.

AV Club emergency.

I need Virgil Fox right away!

- Virgil Fox?

- He's out sick.

- I heard he might not make it.

- Very funny, Mr. Fox.

You can pick up your hall pass

on your way out.

That's it. I'm moving to Paraguay.

- Ever really looked at our mascot?

- Forget the hall pass.

Remember that rocket-propulsion all

terrain cart the day of the incident?

Thanks for mentioning it again.

It's been ten minutes

since someone brought it up.

Listen, it ties together. That

invention may have not been a success,

but one element of the design was

proven viable. The quantum accelerator.

Remember that physics, new reality,

many worlds theory kick?

Oh, yeah, that was fun.

I started building my own theory

based on all of that work,

incorporating my proven hypothesis

of quantum acceleration.

I put one of the school's computers

on permanent reserve.

The DSL has been doing all the work.

And moments ago, I uploaded

the last piece of the puzzle.

Commander Tuttle on the bridge!

Dude, no way I'm saluting you.

Fine. At ease.

What I'm about to show you is very,

very, very top secret.

We have to keep this just between us.

Check it out.

Yeah?

What you're looking at

is a successful simulation

of practical time travel.

What are you doing?

I'm trying to stop any more of your

brain from leaking out your ears.

What?

Come on, yesterday you said

I should build something useful.

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