Minutemen Page #7

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ones familiar with the equipment.

If they don't go

then we could all die.

God speed.

I'm the one who messed everything up.

I'll go. Charlie and Zeke

had nothing to do with it.

What do you mean, nothing to do

with it? I invented it.

- I helped.

- No, you didn't.

- Yeah, I did.

- You painted it!

Excuse me.

OK. Enough! Enough!

You'll both go.

You'll be needing me too, sir,

and my hook.

Listen, guys, once we've reversed

the wormhole's polarity,

there's no measuring

how quickly it will cIose.

It could stay open for several more

minutes or vanish instantaneously.

And even if we do

make it back alive,

there's no guarantee we'll return

exactly to the point we exited from.

- Aye aye, Seor Positive.

- Good luck, Zeke!

Virgil, I hear you're

trying to save the world.

That's right. Your big brother's

pretty cool, huh?

When you die can I have your room?

Mine is way too small and...

- Bye, Amy.

- Charlie, um...

Come back in one piece, OK?

Come on, Charlie, we gotta go.

Charlie?

Charlie?

- Here.

- All right, Zeke.

Virgil.

You can do it!

Listen, I just... whatever happens,

I just want you to know...

Hey man, good luck.

With everything.

Yeah, great.

Just, um...

Just be careful.

- OK?

- OK.

Minutemen! Minutemen! Minutemen!

At least they finally

got the name right.

Let's do this, fellas!

Whoa. Cool.

Wow! Space men!

- I think we landed in Munchkinland.

- Cool. What up, Munchkins?

Actually, we're across town

at the park.

What planet did you come from?

From Neptune?

Do people on Neptune eat macaroni? I

Iove macaroni. Is macaroni a vegetable?

Beat it, kid. We're workin' here.

OK, set up the antenna.

Beginning reversal sequence.

Come on.

Wow! Sweet!

This looks good!

Rate of increase is slowing!

The vortex's polarity is decreasing.

Stabilization achieved!

- I think we did it!

- Ha!

We have 20 minutes

till the vortex touches the ground.

Then we can jump back.

Hey, guys.

- Today is September 3rd, 2005.

- First day of school freshman year.

- Oh, that's the day...

- 'The Incident.'

- 'The Incident.'

- Of course!

The day a module of quantum acceleration

first interacted with the space-time

continuum! The rocket cart.

It's linked the wormhole from our

present to this moment in the past.

- In a few moments our...

- Dude.

Don't do it, Virgil.

Virg, no!

Virg, come on!

You're thinking of stopping

what's going on there?

Why not? Isn't that what

the Minutemen do? Un-do mistakes?

Well, I made a mistake down there.

I have a chance to be somebody.

OK, but know this.

What happened down there is

we became friends.

That day that we were tied up together

on that stupid Ram statue.

This day.

This day you hate so much because

you got a little embarrassed?

This is my favorite day.

Even though I'd still be a nerd,

it didn't really matter anymore,

because now I had a real friend.

And that would always

make everything OK.

So much for always, I guess.

Listen... listen, Virg,

you do what you gotta do here.

And if things aren't the same

on the other side...

...it's been a good ride.

Hey guys, wait!

You shouldn't do that.

'Cause I've got a much better idea.

I mean, why don't we

smear this all over them?

Losers.

No! No! The cIosure rate of the vortex

went into overdrive!

- You're telling me...

- If that touches the ground,

we'll be trapped here for good.

- What about Virgil?

- There's no way we'll make it to him

and back to the vortex in time!

Charlie! Charlie, get up!

Get up, Charlie!

We gotta keep moving!

Let's go!

We're never going to make it.

We're a mile away.

We're stuck in the past forever.

Man, you do not want

to go back there.

Kids getting roughed up

by football players. It's real ugly.

You don't say?

At first, I felt kinda sorry

for the dorky kid, but...

...then I realized,

what does he need me for?

He's got himself

a great friend down there.

And someday he'll have

other great friends, too.

Scorch!

You know, let's come up

with our own handshake.

Can we go? I don't feel like repeating

three years of high school.

- Right. Sorry.

- Good idea! Go, go!

Seatbelts!

Look out!

Car!

- Oh my God!

- Whoa, whoa!

- What are you doing?!

- What do you mean?

That was 1 4th Street!

The vortex is back that way.

Oh, my bad.

- We're never gonna make it!

- No problem.

- Whoa!

- Yeah, grappling hook!

- Oh my God!

- Yeah!

Now keep your hand on the wheel!

- Go, Virgil!

- Go or we're not gonna make it!

We're not gonna make it!

We're not gonna make it!

Minutemen rule!

Where's my rocket cart?

What day is it?

That is it.

No more time travel!

OK, up. You're supposed to be jogging.

Now, nobody loafs in my gym class.

- You don't understand!

- I understand plenty!

I understand you're not jogging.

So let's move it! Let's go!

Go! Go! Go!

Start jogging!

Move it, move it, move it!

I got to get one

of those cool jogging suits.

A smoking tire?

All right, people, no loitering

in the hallways. Let's move it along.

Go!

I'm definitely gonna

institute a dress code in this place!

See, Steph, I need her help.

I have no idea what you just said.

I said, 'My boyfriend

is a Iying cheesebrain.'

- Come on, Steph.

- Derek, I'm trying to study.

You know what?

This is the first day we time traveled.

The day we tried to win the lottery.

Wow, nice outfits, bozos.

Hey, Derek.

Have fun with Jocelyn.

What's that supposed to mean?

Oh, I don't know. I figured

you're both so good with lipstick,

you'd make a perfect match.

You were always gonna be

a dork anyway, Virgil.

And you were always gonna be

a jerk, Derek.

Have a nice life.

- Ladies.

- Oh, what's new, Cockatoo?

- Wow, you look like a superhero.

- Thanks, pumpkin.

Mmm?

You've never kissed her. The scene in

the hallway hasn't happened yet.

Oh, right. Jeanette, I'm sorry!

I was just... I can explain.

Hey, it's OK.

- Uh, Steph.

- Oh, hey.

You didn't see me

in here before, did you?

No, and um...

what's with the weird suit?

Oh, I was just rehearsing

a little school play

about time travel and, uh,

it kinda got me thinking.

If I really could go back in time,

what would I change?

That snowsuit?

I would tell Stephanie how I really

feel about her.

That I think she's great.

- Really?

- Yeah.

And if I could go back in time...

...I think I'd tell Virgil

the same thing.

- Virgil!

- What?

Charlie!

What does the word

'teleportation' mean to you?

It's bigger than time travel,

a whole new transportation paradigm.

We still have the slide projector...

I'll call you.

- It's like time travel.

- No, Charlie.

- Black hole!

- Follow me.

Stephanie, listen to me! Talk to him,

he likes you! You'll like him!

Think about gas prices.

Think about global warming.

I could get Jeanette back!

OK, we're here.

Where's the fire?

Ah, gentlemen, brace yoursel'ves,

for this is going to be

the greatest invention...

In the history of all mankind.

Whoa. I knew the shrimp tacos

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