Moving McAllister Page #5

decided to be invisible.

Yeah, well, if it makes you

feel any better, my father

actually was invisible.

He left when I was young,

and mom didn't really cope

with it well, so...

I went to live with my

uncle when I was thirteen.

I'm sorry.

It's all right,

don't be.

I turned out okay,

didn't I?

Oh, thanks.

What?

Uh, nothing.

Put your glasses on.

You're making me nervous.

My eyes are tired.

You know, I could

always drive.

Yeah, I don't think so.

After what happened last time,

we'd probably end up in Alaska.

I did mention the gas gauge

was broken, didn't I?

Yes.

Didn't I?

Yes, yes you did.

And I accept the consequences

for it.

Consequences?

What would those be?

My ass is on the line,

not yours!

Whoa, whoa.

Rick. Rick!

You ruined my life!

That was rude, wasn't it?

Okay. Okay. You know

what we're going to do?

We are going to pretend

this didn't happen

and that we're just taking

a little break, okay?

Okay.

And, I apologize.

[pig squeals]

Oh, you gotta be kidding.

# [Country music]

Save Dorothy!

I can't believe this

is happening to me.

You do realize I have to

be on a plane in 24 hours.

Can't you take

the bar another time?

I'll lose my job.

I was valedictorian.

Top of my class in law

school. Straight A's.

All the way through.

I can't mess up now.

Not even this once.

Do you really care

about this job that much?

It's everything

I've worked for.

It's everything

I've ever wanted.

Everything?

Yeah.

Okay, then.

Okay. If this job means

that much to you,

then I promise I will

do everything in my

power to get us there.

We're going to make it.

All right?

We're going to make it.

Just as soon as

someone comes along.

[truck horn]

Hey guys!

Orlie!

I told you.

Okay. Come on.

Thanks a lot.

You're good to go.

No, d-d-don't

wake him up.

Don't wake him up.

Sorry.

So, what's your

ex-boyfriend do?

He used to be

a fireman.

Well, that's

interesting.

Wow.

Well, there's not as

many fires as you think.

So, why are you

scared of girls?

I'm not.

You can't talk to them.

I'm talking to you.

Well, that's a

little different.

How?

Okay, let's practice.

Pretend I'm

this beautiful,

very beautiful woman.

And we're on a train,

and it's cold,

so I have to sit

very close to you.

Okay?

Okay.

Hello.

Hi, do you want

to go out with me?

[laughing]

Yeah, okay,

or you could just

introduce yourself first.

Okay.

Okay.

Hello.

Hi, I'm Rick.

Hello, Rick.

[with Russian accent]

What do you do?

I'm a law intern.

Yeah, okay,

when you meet someone,

you want to put

your best foot forward.

Okay? So, say...

Say you're taking

the bar exam in 20 hours,

and you have

this amazing job

lined up

with the best

law firm in Miami.

All right?

All right.

[with Russian accent]

So, Rick,

where do you live?

Miami, Florida, USA.

Oh! Oh, Miami,

I love Miami!

Oh, the beach,

the ocean, the sand...

oh, the water, oh...

[whimpering]

Are you okay?

I'm sorry.

[laughing]

Wow, yikes.

Skin walkers are coming.

I liked how you were

with my dad.

[Orlie snoring]

Yeah?

Well, actors have

a lot in common

with the mentally ill.

Well, I'm glad

you're here.

I think we're

gonna make it.

[Rick]

I gotta call Carl.

[Michelle]

Oh, good, because

I really need to tinkle.

[Orlie]

Don't force it.

...and all I see

around me are the stars,

I'm naked, and, uh,

I speak Portuguese

for some reason.

Why Portuguese?

[cell phone ringing]

Well, because it's

a beautiful language.

Hello?

Carl, it's Rick!

Who?

Rick.

Rick who?

Copy room Rick.

Hey, Rick.

Oh, I booked you

on the 7:
30 out of LAX.

It's the last one

if you want to make the Bar.

Great, we'll still have

a couple hours to spare.

Hey, how's

the studying going?

Pretty good, pretty good.

Could we get

some more eel sauce?

Sure.

Thank you.

You want to go

get that right now?

Carl, you need to think

about the future.

In the immortal

words of He-Man,

"There is magic all around us,

if we stop to see it."

Or was that Lion-O

from the Thundercats?

Uh, I have to go, Rick.

I'm... I'm

entertaining someone.

Okay, come on,

let's go.

In a minute.

Dance with me.

What?

Dance with me.

Really? What about

the Bar exam?

What about your dream job?

What, did you forget?

Five minutes.

One dance.

Live a little.

What would Uncle Max say?

I really don't care

what Uncle Max

would say right now.

Oh...Oh!

[laughing]

# This night belongs

to you and me #

# You can only

be what matters #

# Because you're

seeing all I need #

# Your kiss was

all that mattered #

# It would take the world

to bring me down #

# The whole world to down #

# It would take the world #

# To bring me down #

[Woman]

That ain't yours!

[laughing]

That happens.

Hey, what's happening--

[pig grunting]

[Michelle]

You know, you're actually

a really good dancer.

Thank you.

[Orlie]

Skin walkers are coming.

Oh, my God.

Orlie!

Locke, don't open

the hatch!

Orlie,

are you okay?

Orlie.

Yeah, I'm okay.

[Michelle]

Rick, what are you doing?

Waiting for a semi

to come finish me off.

No, we can't

just give up.

The truck's gone!

Wow.

Yeah, but

so is Dorothy.

Well, at least

they didn't take

my stuff.

Y'all okay?

Lost my truck.

Left it

right here.

What do you drive?

A Paradise.

[laughing]

Paradise, I'm sorry--

I'm sorry for that.

Earl, who'd steal

a damn Paradise truck?

Oh...

Oh, you think

the Lady's got it?

Maybe.

Now, when you guys

see the Lady,

you've got

to be respectful.

Is she someone

important?

Yeah, if'n you want

to get your truck back.

So, she knows

where it is?

The Lady knows

everything.

Yup.

Lady knowed

everything.

You'll get

your truck back,

or...

It's that big door

over there.

Now, ya'll ask

for the Lady,

all right?

[Michelle]

Okay.

Well, get out!

Come on, now!

Thank you.

Get going.

All right, remember,

don't let the door hit you

where the good Lord split you.

[screaming happily]

There's no one here.

Me and my friends

want to see the Lady!

[Michelle]

No, no, just

wait a minute.

Hi.

We're here

to see the Lady.

Yeah.

[Rick]

I have a bad feeling

about this.

[Orlie]

Come on, show a little

backbone, will you?

[door creaks, slams]

[faint chattering]

# [piano, classical]

You.

Yeah?

What's the capital

of Kentucky?

[whispers]

Lexington.

Frankfort.

Louisville?

Frankfort.

Knowledge.

You know what

I'm saying?

Now, I really don't cotton

much to strangers

just dropping by

uninvited in my little

establishment here,

so, you'd better have

a very good reason.

Someone stole

our truck.

I don't see anybody

talking to you, skirt.

Yeah, but I--

Someone stole our truck.

Mmm, you think I took it.

No, I-- I mean,

never.

But supposin' I did,

I wonder what could

possibly be in it for me.

Oh, well...I've got,

like, 34 bucks in change.

And you can have him.

Or, you two boys

could work it off.

I've been

just itching...

to smell myself

some new blood.

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