Mystery Woman: Game Time

[JINGLE FROM COMPUTER]

CAN I HELP YOU:

WITH SOMETHING?

UNH!

AAH!

UHH!

THIS CAN'T BE

THE WHOLE SHIPMENT.

PHILBY, TELL ME THIS

IS NOT THE WHOLE SHIPMENT.

Philby:
OH, WHERE'S

THAT PACKING SLIP?

IT'S ON THE COUNTER.

WE'RE GONNA SELL

ALL THIS AT A BOOK SIGNING?

IF DONALD FISKE IS DOING

THE SIGNING, I AM.

DON'T COUNT YOUR CHICKENS

BEFORE THEY HATCH.

HE'S ALREADY CANCELED 2 TIMES.

3. HE'S KIND OF--

- TEMPERAMENTAL?

- UNRELIABLE.

- DECEITFUL.

- ECCENTRIC.

THE MAN HAS NOT MADE

A PUBLIC APPEARANCE

IN OVER 2 YEARS.

WHICH BOOKS ARE SHOR IN THE ORDER?

HIS SECOND.

MURDER BY ICE CREAM.

I READ THAT ONE.

NOT AS GOOD AS THE FIRST.

IT WAS A BEST-SELLER,

CASSIE.

Cassie:
SO, UM,

HOW EXACTLY DID YOU GE THE ELUSIVE MR. FISKE

TO AGREE TO A SIGNING?

HE COULDN'T RESIST MY CHARM,

MY GRACE.

YOU'VE NEVER MET HIM,

HAVE YOU?

APPARENTLY, MY TELEPHONE

VOICE IS PRETTY ENTICING.

MORE THAN JUS YOUR VOICE.

WHAT?

THAT GUY OVER THERE.

HE'S BEEN LOOKING AT YOU

MORE THAN THAT BOOK

HE'S BEEN PRETENDING

TO READ.

NO, HE HASN'T. REALLY?

YEAH. GO ASK HIM

WHAT HE WANTS.

HAS THAT WORKED FOR YOU?

NO. I'M A D.A.

ONLY GUYS I MEE ARE PUBLIC DEFENDERS

AND ALLEGED FELONS.

SO, WHAT? ALL YOUR DATES

END WITH A PLEA?

SAM, SAM.

I'LL SEE YOU LATER.

HI. UM, SOMEONE WILL

HELP YOU IN A MINUTE.

OH, THANK YOU.

I WAS JUST BROWSING.

IS THIS YOUR STORE?

NO. I'M JUS A FRIEND OF THE OWNER'S.

BYE.

ARE YOU LOOKING:

FOR SOMETHING SPECIAL?

ARE YOU SAMANTHA KINSEY?

- YEAH.

- RANDY TOLD ME ABOUT YOU.

RANDY?

RANDY LAWRENCE.

HE SAYS YOU'VE KNOWN

EACH OTHER SINCE--

BRADLEY.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

JUST LOOKING OU FOR MY INTEREST.

YOUR INTERESTS HAVE

NOTHING TO DO WITH MY BUSINESS.

BESIDES, WHAT YOU THOUGHT, THIS

WHOLE IDEA WAS STUPID, REMEMBER?

BUT THEN I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT BE

RIGHT ABOUT TEST-MARKETING THE GAME.

STINKY.

STINKY LAWRENCE.

NOBODY'S CALLED ME

THAT SINCE--

YOU'RE STINKY LAWRENCE.

FROM COLBERT OLSON

ELEMENTARY.

MRS. DONNOR'S CLASS.

I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU SINCE

FRESHMAN YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL.

I KNEW YOU'D REMEMBER,

SAMMY.

I HEARD YOU TOOK OVER

YOUR UNCLE'S BOOKSTORE.

- SAMANTHA.

- RANDY.

WHO ARE YOU?

BRADLEY STILLMAN.

E-MUSING GAMES.

WHAT IS THAT? VIDEO GAMES?

COMPUTER GAMES?

EXACTLY.

HOURS OF MIND-NUMBING GLEE

WATCHING SOME NONHUMAN

KILL AND MAIM EVERYTHING

IN ITS PATH?

BUT THE SOUND EFFECTS

ARE AWESOME.

NO, THANKS.

HEY, YOU SEE,

NOW THAT'S WHY I CREATED

THE WORLD'S VERY FIRS COMPUTER GAME MYSTERY.

I CALL ITWHODUNNIT.

IT'S GOING TO BE AVAILABLE

EXCLUSIVELY AT MYSTERY WOMAN.

I SELL BOOKS, NOT GAMES.

WHODUNNITIS VERY MUCH

MORE THAN JUST A GAME.

IT'S THE NEXT STEP

IN THE EVOLUTION OF MYSTERY.

YOUR BOOKSTORE IS THE PERFEC LAUNCHING PAD FOR IT.

MOST OF MY CUSTOMERS DON'T HAVE

COMPUTERS, AND EVEN IF THEY DID,

WHY WOULD I WANT TO SELL THEM

SOMETHING THAT KEPT THEM FROM READING?

IT'S BAD FOR BUSINESS.

YOU'RE TOUGH, SAMMY.

I LIKE THAT. TELL YOU WHA I'M GONNA DO.

I'M GOING TO PUT THE GAME ON YOUR

SHELVES ENTIRELY ON CONSIGNMENT,

NO COST TO YOU, WHATSOEVER.

WE'LL SELL IT FOR $24.95 A UNIT.

I'LL CUT YOU IN FOR HALF.

THAT'S $12.50 A UNI FOR DOING ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

$12.50 A UNIT. WOW.

DON'T DECIDE RIGHT NOW.

TAKE IT HOME. PLAY THE GAME.

IF IT'S NOT THE GREATEST MYSTERY

THAT YOU'VE EVER--

THANKS, BUT NO, THANKS.

- SAMMY.

- STINKY.

IT'S GREAT SEEING

YOU AGAIN.

YOU, TOO, RANDY LAWRENCE.

VERY NICE MEETING YOU.

YOU KNOW, WE CAN TAKE THIS TO THE

GAMERS AT NEXT WEEK'S CONVENTION.

SAMANTHA.

FISKE JUST CALLED.

HE'S CANCELED AGAIN.

THAT'S 4.

[SIGHS]

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

Voice mail:
THIS IS DONALD FISKE.

PLEASE LEAVE A MESSAGE.

[BEEP]

OH, UH, HELLO,

MR. FISKE.

THIS IS SAMANTHA KINSEY

FROM MYSTERY WOMAN,

AND I WAS JUST LOOKING

AT MY CALENDAR,

AND I REALIZED THA THE LAST WEEK OF THE MONTH

IS, UH,

THE WESTERN DAYS FESTIVAL.

SO, I WAS THINKING THAT WE COULD

RESCHEDULE YOUR BOOK SIGNING,

UM, TO FEATURE YOUR BOOK

THE PALE HORSE DUDE RANCH,

WHICH I KNOW IS YOUR FIRS AND PROBABLY VERY CLOSE

TO YOUR HEART. SO, UH, ANYWAY,

JUST GIVE ME A CALL. PLEASE.

THANK YOU SO MUCH,

MR. FISKE.

HE'S NEVER GONNA CALL.

MAYBE THE SIXTH MESSAGE

IS THE CHARM.

IT BETTER BE.

I'M GOING TO BE LEF WITH OVER A HUNDRED BOOKS

IF I CAN'T SWEET-TALK HIM

INTO RESCHEDULING.

YEAH, I COULDN'T HELP

BUT OVERHEAR--

RANDY, NOT NOW.

WERE YOU JUST TALKING

TO DONALD FISKE?

I BELIEVE THE LADY

TOLD YOU TO LEAVE.

OK.

WAIT, WAIT.

I KNOW I'M GOING

TO REGRET THIS.

YOU KNOW DONALD FISKE?

THE WRITER, RIGHT?

YEAH, FISKEY AND ME

GO WAY BACK.

USED TO BUMP INTO HIM

IN L.A. ALL THE TIME.

FISKEY?

HATES WHEN I CALL HIM

THAT. FUNNY GUY. TOTAL SLOB.

IT'S A WONDER HE GETS

ANYTHING DONE:

START TO FINISH:

THROUGH ALL THAT MESS.

SO, DONALD FISKE

ACTUALLY TAKES YOUR CALLS?

WELL, I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM

IN A COUPLE OF YEARS, BUT YEAH.

YEAH. TOTAL FIRST-NAME BASIS.

I'D BE HAPPY TO PUT IN A GOOD WORD

FOR YOU NEXT TIME I'M IN L.A.

- HE LIVES HERE NOW.

- REALLY?

YEAH, HE MOVED OUT OF L.A. TRYING TO

GET AWAY FROM CRAZED FANS AND ALL.

- HMM.

- SO...

YOU COULD REALLY

GIVE HIM A CALL:

AND PUT IN A GOOD WORD

FOR ME?

SURE. WHAT KIND OF QUID

DO I GET FOR MY QUO?

EVERYONE WHO PLAYS I LOVES IT.

I DON'T KNOW.

JUST PLAY THE GAME.

YOU WON'T REGRET THIS.

I ALREADY DO.

SEE YA, SAMMY.

SAMANTHA.

RIGHT, RIGHT. SAMANTHA.

YOU KNOW, I OUGHTA

TAKE A CUE FROM HIM

AND DO A LITTLE HUSTLING

OF MY OWN.

Woman:

YOU KNOW YOU WANT ME BACK.

Fiske:

OH, GET OUTTA HERE!

OH, COME ON. COME ON.

FOR GOD'S SAKE!

CAN I HELP YOU?

UM, I-- I JUS STOPPED BY.

IS-- SHOULD I COME BACK

AT A BETTER TIME?

IF YOU WANT.

Fiske:
GET OUT!

ARE THEY OK:

IN THERE?

IT'S NOTHING. MY PARENTS

ARE JUST COMMUNICATING.

Fiske:
GET OUTTA HERE!

MAYBE IF YOU'D STOP

COMPLAINING FOR 5 MINUTES.

YOUR TRYING TO GET YOUR HANDS ON

EVERYTHING. NOT ANYMORE. THAT'S OVER.

EVERYTHING I DID,

I DID FOR LOVE!

YEAH, LOVE OF MONEY.

YOU NEED ME, FISKE,

AND YOU KNOW IT.

YEAH, WHY DON'T YOU GO BACK

TO YOUR GENERAL JERK BOYFRIEND.

- EXCUSE ME.

- WHO ARE YOU?

I'M SAMANTHA KINSEY.

I OWN MYSTERY WOMAN.

I'M HERE

ABOUT THE BOOK SIGNING.

MAYBE THIS IS A BAD TIME.

WHAT WOULD BE A GOOD TIME?

FOR THE SIGNING?

- WHEN AND WHERE, SUSANNA?

- SAMANTHA.

THAT WASN'T MY QUESTION.

- THURSDAY.

- WEDNESDAY. 6 P.M.

- BUT HE SAID--

- I'LL DO THE SPEAKING FOR MR. FISKE,

AND HE'LL BE THERE!

CAMERON, IN THE CAR.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE,

HMM?

WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?

I WAS JUST, UH,

RETHINKING ARMAGEDDON.

OH, THAT'S FUNNY.

THAT WOMAN.

JODY.

JODY.

SHE SAID THAT YOU

WOULD DO THE BOOK SIGNING.

WELL, SHE LIED.

THAT'S WHAT SHE DOES.

SHE OPENS HER MOUTH.

BLAH-BLAH-BLAH-BLAH-BLAH.

LIE, LIE, LIE, LIE, LIE.

I'D PAY MONEY TO ANYBODY WHO COULD

SHUT THAT WOMAN UP FOR GOOD.

THAT'S A PRETTY

SCARY THING TO SAY.

WELL, YOU KNOW,

I DON'T MEAN IT.

SEE, THAT'S WHAT YOU DO,

IS YOU TERRORIZE THE ONES

YOU LOVE.

IS THAT FROM:

YOUR NEW BOOK?

NO. THAT'S FROM BEING MARRIED TO

THAT WOMAN FOR TOO MANY YEARS.

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