Nativity 2: Danger in the Manger! Page #7

- It's very musical theatre, isn't it?

- Oh, in the worst possible sense.

- Lowest common denominator.

- Derivative, yeah.

The audiences love this kind of thing.

Really?

Christmas ain't for paupers

Not for scum like us

No nice presents to unwrap

Just a bin bag full of rubbish

And a big spot on your chin

oozing with pus

Happy Christmas!

Christmas comes but once a year,

but not for these boys and girls,

I fear.

Not for them are those Christmas pies.

Christmas is... a pack of lies! Ha!

Where is Christmas?

Hiding underneath the tree?

But this kind of... sentimentality...

...it's rather rewarded, is it?

A little boy in a hat and glasses,

singing his little heart out.

That's what wins prizes, I'm afraid.

Ah.

Could it be that Christmas

has abandoned me?

Cold and hungry, cold and hungry

Cold and hungry, cold and hungry

Cold and hungry, cold and hungry

Merry Christmas.

Solo like that could really win you

the competition, Roderick.

Really?

And they're definitely on after us

in the running order, yes?

Yes, that's right. They are.

Interesting.

Mr Peterson, it could go...

I'll just stop here for five minutes.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Why are we stopping? We've got to go.

Listen. We need to properly talk

about what we do next.

- What do you mean?

- These children are cold and tired.

- The children are fine.

- It'll be very dark very soon.

And then we'll be stuck.

Jessie and Pixie are passing out.

- Yeah.

- Jessie and Pixie are my children.

- I know all about them!

- Mr Poppy, they are not your children.

You're a classroom assistant

and you're not a very good

classroom assistant

because you've led these children

to the middle of nowhere and now what?

This is not a great big adventure.

This is serious and we're in trouble.

I'd like to think that you were gonna

help us get out of here.

But, frankly, so far I've seen nothing

but irresponsibility.

So grow up, stop behaving like a child,

and help me to sort this out.

Do you know who you sound like,

Mr Peterson?

Your dad.

That is...

I don't think I'll ever

get a best friend.

I'll be your best friend.

But you'll just leave,

like everyone else.

You'll leave school and move on.

I need a friend I can be with forever.

A forever friend.

I'll be your friend forever.

- Really?

- Yep.

Your best friend.

What's that, Mr Peterson?

Oh, it's just a little thing

my mummy gave me, a long time ago.

That's my brother. We're twins.

He's got the other half.

Well, at least he used to.

When you put it together,

it makes a heart.

But we don't really see each other

any more, me and my brother. No.

Did you have an argument

like you just did with Mr Poppy?

Not really an argument.

We were just...

...very different types of people.

I think you should say

sorry to Mr Poppy.

Yeah, maybe I should.

I'm not very good at saying sorry.

Come on, Mr Peterson.

Oh, all right.

Oh, shh. He's coming.

- I'm not speaking to him.

- OK.

I'm gonna do all my

speaking through you.

Pixie has convinced me

that perhaps I snapped a little,

and I've come to apologise.

Tell Mr Peterson

I've just had about enough

of him making promises

and then breaking them.

Mr Poppy's had enough of you

promising promises and breaking promises.

It's not exactly what I said,

but it'll do.

Pixie, can you convince Mr Poppy

that I'm genuinely sorry?

Mr Peterson says

that he's convenuinely sorry.

Jessie, can you ask Mr Poppy

where the baby is?

- Cleo, have you got the baby?

- Yeah, but I gave it to Sadie.

- Sadie, have you got the baby.

- I gave it to Elena.

- Who's got the baby?

- Where is the baby?

- Where's the baby?

- We can't have lost the baby.

Baby!

Mr Peterson, I'm really,

really sorry.

I should never have taken the class,

escaped from school, and got to...

Mr Poppy. That's not helping.

Ba-by!

- Baby!

- Ba-by!

Hey, Louise.

You had us scared to death.

Did you bring this baby today?

I just thought she'd like to be in

the Song For Christmas.

Oh, Louise.

Mr Peterson!

Hey, look.

- Look, we've found her.

- He's found the baby!

That's too high! Goodness sakes!

Shh. Mr Poppy.

- We're in this mountain range here, yeah?

- Yeah.

- The castle is just over that mountain.

- Just over there.

- Well, we can't climb that mountain.

- Yes, we can.

Isn't there a way round the side?

We haven't got time

to go around the side, Mr Peterson.

We're gonna have to go over.

Yes, we can climb the mountain

If we all share the load

Yes we can reach the summit

at the end of the road

If we lift our hearts to heaven

And reach out for the stars

Yes, we can climb the mountain

Cos the mountain is ours

Let the white winter weather

Try and hinder our climb

Yes, we can climb the mountain

Because it's Christmas time

It's Christmas time

I can see the castle!

Whoa.

Right, come on.

Let's get back from the edge.

Stay back, everyone.

We've got to turn back.

We've got to go back the way we came.

- We can't go back.

- Well, we can't fly off that.

- We've got to get to Song For Christmas.

- We can't fly off the cliff!

So we're not going to

Song For Christmas?

- Please, Mr Peterson.

- We can't... We can't fly. I'm sorry.

- Please, Mr Peterson.

- Look...

if you've got a way to get down

this cliff, we can talk about it.

It's not about us having a way,

is it, Mr Peterson?

You don't believe in

any way we do,

because you're always down on

everything I suggest.

- OK. Tell me how we're gonna do it.

- I've got a rope, actually.

Look, do you really believe we can suspend

14 children, a baby and a donkey

off the side of this mountain?

The problem is, Mr Peterson,

is you don't believe we can.

- Yes, we can, Mr Peterson.

- Yes, we can, Mr Peterson.

- Yes, we can, Mr Peterson.

- Yes, we can, Mr Peterson.

- Yes, we can, Mr Peterson.

- Yes, we can, Mr Peterson.

Yes, we can, Mr Peterson.

Tommy! Brilliant!

- Do you believe, Mr Peterson?

- Not really.

- Oh!

- But I'm willing to give it a go.

- Don't push your luck.

- Get the rope!

- You're fine.

- This is awesome!

Don't look down!

That's it.

- Hold on to the rope. That's it.

- Whoa!

Hold on. Steady. Steady.

Are you all right, Bill?

Careful.

Careful!

Are you all right, Lucy?

- Get the rope.

- Yeah, I've got it. No!

Whoa!

Don't let go!

Concentrate on the rope!

- I'm communicating with the donkey.

- It's heavy!

- Go, Tommy.

- Steady.

- You're fine.

- My whole strength. That's all I've got.

- Well, hold it tight. I'm losing grip.

- I'm holding it tight.

Whoa! Whoa! Tommy!

Tommy!

Tommy, are you OK?

Just hold on.

- Is everyone all right.

- Yes.

- Tommy!

- Just...

Just stay there. You're fine.

Keep looking up.

You have to go down there, Mr Peterson.

- I can't go down there.

- You have to go down.

- Well, why can't you do it?

- Because you're the teacher.

This is your moment, Mr Peterson.

You've got to go down there.

I'll spot you.

I'll hold the rope.

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