Nevinnost Page #5

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with men. You're afraid of them.

I'm sorry.

Thanks.

Where did you say Tomas went?

To Japan.

You see, if you didn't play at clowns

you could have been going too.

I know.

Next, please.

Come in.

Hello.

This is never a pleasant situation.

It's made easier by the fact

that we're both doctors and

understand the consequences.

- True.

- Good.

There are two options for

stimulation should you need it.

- Photos and a video.

- Thanks.

I need to measure you

at rest and then erect.

I see you don't get bored around here.

I'll have to take the measurements.

- Hello.

- Hello, Lada.

- Coming in?

- No.

I'm here officially.

A girl from Tereza's class

has run away from home.

Why are you shouting? I can hear.

Sorry.

- I wonder if you've seen her.

- What's that?

- Have you seen her?

- This one?

No...

Hang on.

She's been here.

- Hello.

- Hello.

Is Dr Kotva at home?

Tereza, you have a visitor.

There's nobody at home.

Did you need something?

She needed to use the toilet.

So you let her inside?

Of course.

Radka...

Sixteen.

Slightly above average so

everything seems to be okay.

You're out of trouble. Congratulations.

She got scared about what she'd started

and just started fibbing.

Why do you think she did it?

She's compensating for

not having a father around.

She denies reality and creates her own.

It's a classic example of transference.

Just because you helped her.

A man being kind to her was

something she wasn't used to.

If you have experience with such cases

why did you believe her?

Liars like her can be very convincing.

They live in their

altered reality for years.

I'm sorry.

Are you looking for someone?

You have to tell me about

it. I'm really interested.

He's tired, he'll tell you tomorrow.

- Very well.

- I'll get it ready.

Hey!

- It's a party!

- What?

We're having a party.

What are you doing up there? What?

Why are you doing that?

We've looked forward to

you coming home so much

that now we're going to have a party.

Stop it.

Come on.

Stop it.

Did you hear me?

I'm just so happy that you're innocent.

- Stop it.

- And that it wasn't true.

- Go to bed.

- Why should I?

- Go.

- Why? Dad's asleep.

- Go to bed.

- Go yourself.

- Tereza!

- What?

- Go to bed.

- Okay.

Listen, Zdravko...

It doesn't look good.

The girl found in your bathroom...

It seems you're resposible.

She was fifteen.

I'm hungry.

It's my right to be given food.

There you are.

Last time it needed salt, didn't it?

Oh, God. Sorry about that.

Listen to me, you worthless sh*t.

You're going to write down all

the names and contact details

or you'll get this well-seasoned

soup until you happily lap it up.

And you'll keeping eating it

until it destroys your kidneys

and you start pissing blood.

Is that clear?

Enjoy your meal.

Don't take it personally.

It's not just this. It's

everything. I've had it.

I need more in my life

than just futility.

- What will you do?

- No idea.

I'll go back to psychology,

offer counselling.

Just the place to meet

well-adjusted go- getters.

I don't know...

I'll go camping somewhere

and clear my head.

Off you go then and I'll

see you in two weeks.

- Hello, Mr Rajchrt.

- Hello.

- Can I have the key, please?

- Your wife took it.

- Where are we, supposedly?

- I'm at a rehersal.

- And you?

- Doing an operation.

This is the spot.

What spot?

- The scene of the crime.

- Here, was it?

This is where, in the summer of '95,

I murdered my sister, Milada.

What are you saying?

I took all the candles in the cottage

and used the wax to fashion a doll.

She had proper arms, legs, and hair.

I used Milada's real hair

and then I pierced the doll

with all the pins and needles

I had in my emergency kit.

With every stab I made a

wish that Milada would die.

I wished for her to fall while abseiling

or for her boat to capsize,

for her to stop existing.

Thank God none of that happened.

Nobody died.

Yes, they did.

- Somebody did die.

- Who was that?

I did.

I died here that day.

You scary little thing,

you're making me afraid.

You're right to be afraid.

On this spot you said

those beautiful words to me

about not hurting people.

Remember?

And about resposability

and the burden you carry.

Do you remember?

You wished things had been

different but they couldn't be

because Milada was pregnant

to you and was leaving Lada.

You, the knight in shining

armour, the real man,

you chose to stand by her at

the cost of a life with me.

I was fourteen.

Then you went back to the

fire, played your guitar

and I heard you and I

wasn't even allowed to cry.

Not even that.

And then I decided

that it never happened,

that I wouldn't accept it, that

it wasn't real, wasn't true.

That I'd go on doing things

like we'd done until then.

And you allowed it to happen.

We kept on sleeping together.

During the night patrol, in

the cottage and outside again.

You called it saying goodbye.

You didn't want to hurt me

and cause more suffering.

Maybe you were waiting

for my flame to go out.

You didn't know

you were making love to someone

who was capable of anything.

Is there any wine left, little clown?

Sorry. Of course there is.

You're permeable like a sieve

and you're sifting for

nuggets of experience.

You're afraid of death. I'm not.

Maybe you thought you'd help

me to stand on my own two feet.

You're still doing it,

helping people to walk.

But sometimes you need to break

them before you can fix them.

And all those years,

every day and every night,

I wished you'd leave Milada

and Tereza and be with me.

For something to happen to

them, for them not to be,

for you to be with me.

You allowed such thoughts

to keep coming to me.

You never tried to help me.

- Bye.

- See you.

You don't know how to

say goodbye, do you?

It can be so hard and you

don't want anyone to suffer.

You don't want to lose

anything or anyone.

- Where's Danek?

- Asleep.

You're a listener and

that's to your advantage.

You're playful but you

don't know how to lose.

You've led a charmed life. So far.

Five years later, it was over.

I remember exactly when it happened.

It was a warm October

day not unlike today

and my sister asked me to

take Tereza to pre-school.

If only she knew, if she

suspected what I was thinking

while I was taking your child to pre

- school.

It was unusually calm and quiet

as if everyone had hidden from me,

as if I'd contracted

some infectious disease.

Then I realised that I

wasn't living my own life

and that you weren't my husband.

And the only thing left

for me was to do penance.

I quit medicine, became a blood donor,

distributed

meals-on-wheels,

started making dolls for UNICEF,

went to bed with boys nobody else loved.

I left the drama group and

started acting for sick kids,

kids who were helpless, disabled, dying.

Now you have two balls.

I chose places others wouldn't walk into

and I played the clown and made jokes.

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