Norway Page #2

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Alice...

Alice...

Yes.

In wonderland.

This must be Peter Pan then!

So who am I?

The designated sucker?

You?

You're my boyfriend, Zano.

Tonight you are my boyfriend.

"You are my boyfriend, Zano.

Tonight you're my boyfriend".

Are we there?

No.

SQ?

There's something I need

to take care of.

Oh?

I won't be long.

Will you take care of junior, here?

We'll be just fine... won't we?

Ok!

I'll give you the royal treatment.

Put 'em up, champ!

Hands off, you old fart!

Something smells fishy.

You're chocking me,

motherfuckers!

I wasn't long, was I?

A real lady. Right on time.

Can you turn that

piece of junk down?

Why did you tie him up?

We were playing Hangman.

He was gonna fall and...

it's a long story...

Let's move on.

Were you throwing a barbecue in there?

It was all smoky and sh*t.

Yes, a barbecue.

Sort of.

Let's get burned!

"Electric Angel"

"The fever resides inside"

Electric Angel"

Is this really necessary?

You know the drill.

If the rhythm stops...

...your heart will stop

beating, we got it.

But turn it down, will you honey?

You'll wake up the werewolf.

So, what about Norway?

You guys barely survive up there, right?

A frozen kingdom!

Are you having a good

time, you crazy f***?

Are we lost?

We're almost there!

So...

how about it?

How about what?

Well...

you know...

- What, here?

- Yes...

Somewhere around here,

I don't know...

Behind a tree or something...

I don't know.

I thought we'd save the best for last.

Get the job done first.

Is that all I am to you?

Just another job?

Come on...

Look who's talking now!

Fine, let's get it over with.

You better behave!

Come on...

Here's fine.

That's it...

You're not gonna

bite me, will you?

In the throes of passion

and all that?

...a warm girl.

Oh I'm warm alright.

But you're stone f***ing cold!

You don't have a heart,

do you?

Did that bloody Norwegian pull

a disappearing act with my stereo?

No way, he must be

around here somewhere.

Peter!

That's the spirit.

We've got work to do.

Peter!

Peter!

Petros... Piotr... Mum and dad

are looking for you!

Zano...

Do you think something

happened to him?

Like what? He's a big boy,

I'm sure he's fine.

Seriously? He was

totally wasted and...

And?

And, he was... you know.

And?

Stop it, Zano!

Come on, let's go this way.

- There he is.

- Where?

Where's my stereo,

you little sh*t?

Are we there yet?

We're here.

What is this place?

You don't suppose little

miss sunshine over there...

...will throw us in a dungeon,

like Kolokotronis, do you?

Are you familiar with

Kolokotronis?

Let me ask you something.

This job we're supposed to do...

Do you even know what it is?

No.

No?

Not exactly...

I was only told to

bring you here.

Him, too?

Him too, yes.

OK...

Can you see anything?

F***-all.

Don't I know you

from somewhere?

Come on.

That's more like it.

"Dracula, Dracula, Dracula"

"Why did I have

to steal your kiss?"

"I rule over your life"

"Attract you like a magnet"

"I will rule over your thoughts"

"You can escape me no more"

"Dracula, Dracula, Dracula"

"We are yours by the thousands"

"Body and soul at your command"

"You may torment us"

"as long as you give us

the kiss of life"

"Dracula, Dracula, Dracula"

Hello, my friends!

I'm so glad you've come!

Let me introduce myself.

My name is Bram Stoker.

Bram Stoker?

The Norwegian is back!

Excuse me, what did he just say?

I don't speak the lingo...

- Who is he?

- Who, him?

He's Bram Stacker.

The author of Dracula.

Ever heard of Dracula?

He's just a sack of bones, man!

100 years old and counting!

He's on life support.

He's got one foot in the grave,

no joke!

That's why you're here...

He's the job?

Yes...

That's f***ed up!

All you have to do

is bite him.

Give him eternal life.

Are you friggin' kidding me?

No f***ing way.

He's gonna make it

worth your while.

I don't give a f***.

Why are you so negative

all of a sudden?

I don't feel like biting him.

And you know what?

He's not who he says he is.

And even if he was,

I still wouldn't give a f***!

Fine, so he's not

Bram Stoker.

A little white lie, to entice you.

Will you bite him?

Junior here can do it.

Who, Peter? Peter is not

fully transformed yet...

You conniving little b*tch...

How do you know so much

about my kind?

Did you set me up?

Who the f*** are you?

Who are these people?

Who is this guy?

Mach das!

(Do it!)

Well, it just so happens

I speak German...

and this is fake...

What is this? No way man!

No way!

Adolf Hitler?

Hey, Norway...

What did the old fart

do to you?

This is where I stop dancing.

The f***ing music

has stopped, too.

"Norway is too far away

"We better go to Athens"

"Norway, is too far away"

"We're better off in Athens"

I guess you took me up

on that dungeon, huh?

Looks that way...

Just like Kolokotronis!

You guys have it all sorted out,

don't you?

What did you expect?

I was asking for it...

I guess...

So what about us?

What about us?

We could have had something...

I could have been

your boyfriend...

We could have worked it out...

Look, Zano...

the others are getting

impatient out there.

If you don't do the job..

They will off you.

Get the job done, get your money

and get gone.

In time, they will

forget about you.

You tramp...

you dirty little b*tch!

Get the job done...

get the money...

get gone...

and everything

will be fine.

G'dav to you!

You again, you pathetic

excuse for a man!

Watch your tongue!

I'll slash you right open...

You can fart

on my balls!

Why don't you turn the old man,

so we can all go home?

Do it yourself, you

slobbering idiot!

With my blood?

He'll go into toxic shock!

Do you have any idea

who he is?

He is a big deal...

and you're nothing

but a dipshit.

Oh, he's a pretty big

a**hole, alright!

One to the left,

one to the right.

I will slash you right open...

Just like Jesus Christ...

it's a full house!

You didn't seem to mind when I wined you

and dined you back at my joint!

Do the job,

you dead man!

No...

Jimmy.

What the hell are you

wearing Jimmy boy?

Athens is a

tough place to be, man.

You grave digging scum...

What did I tell you, you moron?

Didn't I tell you to sit tight?

Now...

Now what, man?

Once a crow, always a crow.

I love you, man.

You set me up.

You set me up, alright.

I made you a designer coffin with

the Sistine Chapel on it.

I'll even throw in a

Cadillac hearse.

Get the job done

and go back home!

Go back to the ground man.

Everyone's waiting!

Who's everyone?

Everyone's waiting...

Three's a crowd, man!

You have reached the funeral

home of Dimitris Dimitriou.

Please leave your message

after the tone.

Jimmy...?

I hope you're ready.

Oh, I'm ready!

But get me away

from this relic,

he f***ing reeks!

The people await.

The people...

What are you doing?

So how about it?

Feel like dancing now?

I don't believe you.

Bite him!

Bite him!

Bestow eternal life upon him.

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