Nothing to Lose

Where do I start?

It's not you.

Well, actually, it is you.

Look, I'm just not...

I'm not attracted

to you any more.

I need space.

You kinda...

You kinda gross me out.

In the beginning, it was different.

In the beginning, you were better.

But then I got to know you

real well, and...

l... I came to realize...

that you're a fat idiot.

- I got ya. I got ya. I got ya. I got ya.

- Okay. Okay.

- Okay, okay, okay. Let me try it.

- You gotta be straight.

- Okay.

- Straight face.

- Okay, okay.

- All right.

- I want a divorce.

- Why?

It's a physical thing.

- Physical?

- I've been experimenting

with other men lately.

A lot of other men

and women.

I don't know. I mean, Antonio can do

this thing with his tongue...

and William's stamina

is amazing.

And as far as hands go,

well, your father's hands are...

You are no match.

I have no equal.

Get down here.

If the shoe fits

I want you to wear it

and wear it good

Sulkin'about them times

when I was by myself

I was always lookin'

for somebody else

But as time went on

I had a talk with my mind

Friends like you and you

I gotta leave behind

And I'm sayin'call me a fool

'Cause you only rub it in

- And I'll never see you if I had known

- I'll never see them again

'Cause, well I know the difference

Just stay in my own business

And I'll never, ever

depend on you

Friends and enemies

around me every day

I can't believe

the things they say

Takin'me for granted

Give me no credit at all

I'll just keep bouncin'

like a bouncin'ball

I don't wanna step

on nobody's foot but

You call me a fool

but you only rub it in

And I'll never see you

if I had known

I'll never see that again

'Cause, well I know the difference

Just stay in my own business

And I'll never, ever

depend on you

B-B-B-Brickman's!

B-B-Brickman's Powerboats!

Get it?

Brickman's sells powerboats.

We make the company mascot

a powerboat. What do you think?

- I like it. Good work, Alan.

- Yes!

- Zachary, you're up.

- All right. I just wanna show you...

- Ladies and gentlemen, Zachary!

- Yes, sir. No...

I haven't taken these to the focus group

yet. I'm still working on that part.

But I just wanted to let you know

these are just preliminary sketches.

Zach.

Ladies and gentlemen, introducing

the new mascot for Hidy Ho Cookies...

Zippy!

What... What is it?

- Zippy.

- What is Zippy?

- He's a cookie man.

- He's a cookie man?

What is that, uh,

on the ground behind him?

Oh, that's a trail of chocolate chips.

See, wherever Zippy goes...

he leaves this magical trail of

chocolate for all the boys and girls...

Magical? This... This looks like poop.

It looks like piles of poop.

- It looks like Zippy's walking around,

Ju... just crapping all over the place.

- Stop.

- It looks like...

- No, no. Those are chocolate chips.

- Emma, what do you think it looks like?

- Excrement.

Zach, let's just say

you're about to take a big bite

of a juicy chocolate chip cookie?

What's the last image you want

floating through your head?

- Excrement?

- Excrement. Right.

Listen, I wanna go out on a limb here.

I'm gonna say maybe we should avoid...

all bowel-related items

with this particular product.

- Just a hunch, you know?

- I'll work up something different.

- All right. Thanks.

- Nick Beam's offce.

- Oh, hi, Ann.

- Ooh, aah...

- It's your wife.

Everybody out.

Big business deal.

- Hello.

- Now we're still on for tonight.

You stood me up twice, you know?

It's a done deal. New York

Philharmonic. Last night in town.

I'll be escorting

the sexiest woman in the world.

- What about me?

- We'll bring ya.

Oh, guess what? My sister left

a message on the machine.

And she's coming in

with her fance next Friday.

- No. Oh, wow.

- Yeah!

I fnally get to meet the

mysterious queen of the Peace Corps.

Yes, you do.

Hey, can you pick 'em up?

Yeah, sure. When is it?

A week from today.

I think it'll be around 10.30.

I'm not sure. I'll have to check.

P.B. Wants

to see you A.S.A.P.

Sorry, honey, I gotta go. There's

an onslaught of initials coming at me.

- Okay. Tell him hello.

- I will.

- I hate you.

- Me too. Bye.

- Philip.

- Nick.

Oh, oh!

Bungee jumping. Sunday.

Nick!

- No thanks, Phillip.

- P.B.

No thanks, P.B.

- Nick?

- P.B.?

Okay, okay.

Okay, forget it.

- This guy is new.

- Yeah. What do you think?

Uh, I think he likes me.

Niroog, the fertility god.

Boy, I like looking at this.

Handmade in the Paleolithic period.

Had to sacrifce my Ides of March

gold aureus in trade.

Pity. But, uh,

I think worth it.

So, which one of you

wanted to see me?

- Charles McGinty is coming in at 5:00.

- The Charles McGinty?

- "McGinty Crackers" Charles McGinty?

- The very same.

- Fantastic.

Anyway, I was supposed to have

dinner with McGinty tonight.

I'd love for you to stand in for me.

Oh, no, uh, s... Phillip,

l-I promised Ann l-I would...

Nick. Oh, Nick.

You gotta help me out here.

I don't get this lucky

every day.

- Look, if this is about a woman...

- You're a pal. I gotta go.

- It just needs to be...

- Guess who just called?

- Ann's divorce lawyer?

- McGinty's secretary. He's rescheduling.

- All right! Yes!

- Want me to get Ann on the line?

No, I'm gonna try to beat her home.

I wanna surprise her.

This is great, huh?

- The wife again?

- No, actually I just met this

incredible brunette on the elevator.

Well, I'm jealous. What would I

have to do to get flowers all the time?

- You don't get flowers all the time?

- Nope.

That's a crime.

Grab it! Grab it!

That's right. That's right.

Phillip.

Hey, a**hole,

get outta the road!

Jump, jump, jump, jump, jump,

jump, jump, jump, jump, jump

I say fight, You're outta the corner

a day late, a dollar short

Friday mornings

most people don't get

You change your life from left to right

You get your wit tracks tight

Must be testing the master

The under hood

the underworld's under man

Never mind being understood

Long as we understand

You can't twist transistor

mixing friends

Soldiers over here don't snitch

They b*tch and bit

All hours while

the crowds peepin'in

Welcome to hell, b*tch.

Car, keys, wallet. Now!

D'you hear what I said?

Okay. Now you listen,

and you listen good.

This is a gun. Okay? Don't be

f***in' around with no gun, white boy.

Helen Keller,

I'm talkin' to you.

I know you hear

what the f*** I'm sayin' to you.

Boy, did you pick

the wrong guy on the wrong day.

Oh!

Oh, sh*t.

Oh, you're trying to lock me...

U-U-Unlock the door.

Stop, motherf***er!

Stop the car! Stop the car!

You're driving on the sidewalk,

man! People got to walk there!

Pull over, man!

White boy, I said pull over!

Yo, man, there's a truck.

I said, yo, man,

there's a truck.

Yo, man, there's a truck

right there. Stop!

What about my wallet?

You wanted to rob me, didn't you?

Yes. I distinctly remember

you wanting to rob me.

Here's my wallet.

You want it?

Here it is. Here. Here.

Right out there.

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