Notting Hill

EXT. VARIOUS DAYS

'She' plays through the credits.

Exquisite footage of Anna Scott -- the great movie star of our

time -- an ideal -- the perfect star and woman -- her life full of

glamour and sophistication and mystery.

EXT. STREET - DAY

Mix through to William, 35, relaxed, pleasant, informal. We

follow him as he walks down Portobello Road, carrying a load of

bread. It is spring.

WILLIAM (V.O.)

Of course, I've seen her films and

always thought she was, well,

fabulous -- but, you know,

million miles from the world I live

in. Which is here -- Notting Hill

-- not a bad place to be...

EXT. PORTOBELLO ROAD - DAY

It's a full fruit market day.

WILLIAM (V.O.)

There's the market on weekdays,

selling every fruit and vegetable

known to man...

EXT. PORTOBELLO ROAD - DAY

A man in denims exits the tattoo studio.

WILLIAM (V.O.)

The tattoo parlour -- with a guy

outside who got drunk and now can't

remember why he chose 'I Love Ken'...

EXT. PORTOBELLO ROAD - DAY

WILLIAM (V.O.)

The racial hair-dressers where

everyone comes out looking like the

Cookie Monster, whether they like

it or not...

Sure enough, a girl exits with a huge threaded blue bouffant.

EXT. PORTOBELLO ROAD - SATURDAY

WILLIAM (V.O.)

Then suddenly it's the weekend, and

from break of day, hundreds of stalls

appears out of nowhere, filling

Portobello Road right up to Notting

Hill Gate...

A frantic crowded Portobello market.

WILLIAM (V.O.)

... and thousands of people buy

millions of antiques, some genuine...

The camera finally settles on a stall selling beautiful stained

glass windows of various sizes, some featuring biblical scenes

and saints.

WILLIAM (V.O.)

... and some not so genuine.

EXT. GOLBORNE ROAD - DAY

WILLIAM (V.O.)

And what's great is that lots of

friends have ended up in this part of

London -- that's Tony, architect

turned chef, who recently invested

all the money he ever earned in a new

restaurant...

Shot of Tony proudly setting out a board outside his restaurant,

the sign still being painted. He receives and approves a huge

fresh salmon.

EXT. PORTOBELLO ROAD - DAY

WILLIAM (V.O.)

So this is where I spend my days

and years -- in this small village in

the middle of a city -- in a house

with a blue door that my wife and I

bought together... before she left

me for a man who looked like Harrison

Ford, only even handsomer...

We arrive outside his blue-doored house just off Portobello.

WILLIAM (V.O.)

... and where I now lead a strange

half-life with a lodger called...

INT. WILLIAM'S HOUSE - DAY

WILLIAM:

Spike!

The house has far too many things in it. Definitely two-

bachelor flat.

Spike appears. An unusual looking fellow. He has unusual

hair, unusual facial hair and an unusual Welsh accent: very

white, as though his flesh has never seen the sun. He wears

only shorts.

SPIKE:

Even he. Hey, you couldn't help me

with an incredibly important

decision, could you?

WILLIAM:

This is important in comparison to,

let's say, whether they should

cancel third world debt?

SPIKE:

That's right -- I'm at last going out

on a date with the great Janine and I

just want to be sure I've picked the

right t-shirt.

WILLIAM:

What are the choices?

SPIKE:

Well... wait for it...

(He pulls on a t-shirt)

First there's this one...

The t-shirt is white with a horrible looking plastic alien

coming out of it, jaws open, blood everywhere. It says 'I Love

Blood.'

WILLIAM:

Yes -- might make it hard to strike a

really romantic note.

SPIKE:

Point taken.

He heads back up the stairs... talks as he changes...

SPIKE:

I suspect you'll prefer the next one.

And he re-enters in a white t-shirt, with a large arrow,

pointing down to his flies, saying, 'Get It Here.'

SPIKE:

Cool, huh?

WILLIAM:

Yes -- she might think you don't have

true love on your mind.

SPIKE:

Wouldn't want that...

(and back up he goes)

Okay -- just one more.

He comes down wearing it. Lots of hearts, saying, 'You're the

most beautiful woman in the world.'

WILLIAM:

Well, yes, that's perfect. Well

done.

SPIKE:

Thanks. Great. Wish me luck.

WILLIAM:

Good luck.

Spike turns and walks upstairs proudly. Revealing that on the

back of the t-shirt, also printed in big letters, is written

'Fancy a f***?'

EXT. PORTOBELLO ROAD - DAY

WILLIAM (V.O.)

And so it was just another hopeless

Wednesday, as I set off through the

market to work, little suspecting

that this was the day which would

change my life forever. This is

work, by the way, my little travel

book shop...

A small unpretentious store... named 'The Travel Book Co.'

WILLIAM (V.O.)

... which, well, sells travel books

-- and, to be frank with you, doesn't

always sell many of those.

William enters.

INT. THE BOOKSHOP - DAY

It is a small shop, slightly chaotic, bookshelves everywhere,

with little secret bits round corners with even more books.

Martin, William's sole employee, is waiting enthusiastically.

He is very keen, an uncrushable optimist. Perhaps without

cause. A few seconds later, William stands gloomily behind the

desk.

WILLIAM:

Classic. Absolutely classic.

Profit from major sales push -- minus

?347.

MARTIN:

Shall I go get a cappuccino? Ease the

pain.

WILLIAM:

Yes, better get me a half. All I can

afford.

MARIN:

I get your logic. Demi-capu coming up.

He salutes and bolts out the door -- as he does, a woman walks in.

We only just glimpse her.

Cut to William working. He looks up casually. And sees

something. His reaction is hard to read. After a pause...

WILLIAM:

Can I help you?

It is Anna Scott, the biggest movie star in the world -- here --

in his shop. The most divine, subtle, beautiful woman on earth.

When she speaks she is very self-assured and self-contained.

ANNA:

No, thanks. I'll just look around.

WILLIAM:

Fine.

She wanders over to a shelf as he watches her -- and picks out a

quite smart coffee table book.

WILLIAM:

That book's really not good -- just

in case, you know, browsing turned to

buying. You'd be wasting your money.

ANNA:

Really?

WILLIAM:

Yes. This one though is... very

good.

He picks up a book on the counter.

WILLIAM:

I think the man who wrote it has

actually been to Turkey, which helps.

There's also a very amusing incident

with a kebab.

ANNA:

Thanks. I'll think about it.

William suddenly spies something odd on the small TV monitor

beside him.

WILLIAM:

If you could just give me a second.

Her eyes follow him as he moves toward the back of the shop and

approaches a man in slightly ill-fitting clothes.

WILLIAM:

Excuse me.

THIEF:

Yes.

WILLIAM:

Bad news.

THIEF:

What?

WILLIAM:

We've got a security camera in this

bit of the shop.

THIEF:

So?

WILLIAM:

So, I saw you put that book down your

trousers.

THIEF:

What book?

WILLIAM:

The one down your trousers.

THIEF:

I haven't got a book down my trousers.

WILLIAM:

Right -- well, then we have something

of an impasse. I tell you what --

I'll call the police -- and,what can

I say? -- If I'm wrong about the whole

book-down-the-trousers scenario, I

really apologize.

THIEF:

Okay -- what if I did have a book down

my trousers?

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