Obsessed Page #3

- It's a Christmas party.

Oh, yeah. You look great.

Thank you.

You grabbing a bite before?

Yeah. You too?

Brilliant minds think alike.

Thank you, John.

Still the best burger in town.

Really?

Hey, John? John?

John.

- Can I have one too?

- Fix her up. The special.

- That was delicious.

- I told you.

You know, we used to come back here

after a hard day's work and cut loose.

- Work hard, play hard?

- Yeah.

Back in the day,

I would throw them back too.

Hey, how's your boyfriend trouble?

- Keep moving forward, right?

- Exactly.

- All right.

- So, what's the grand plan, Derek?

Run the company by 35...

...jet by 40, retire on my private island

and own the Lakers by 50.

- I'm a Sixers fan.

- I'm sorry to hear that.

I'll bring you around to my team,

okay?

- Excuse me?

- Yeah.

Can-? Can I please have

a dirty martini?

Sure.

- You want one?

- No, thanks.

Oh, come on. Big talker.

No, thanks.

- It's Christmas time. Work's dead.

- John, no.

- Bring one for my friend.

- How dirty do you want it?

Make it filthy.

This is for you.

Patrick? Patrick. Patrick.

Once again, great job as the head

of the decoration committee.

- You're like Santa's Little Helper.

- Well, I wouldn't let your people do it.

Hey, don't try this at home, huh?

You'll hurt yourself.

What's up?

What's going on?

You look beautiful.

I'll be right back.

I'm coming for you, Derek.

- I'm coming for you.

- No. I don't dance.

No, come on, you don't wanna

with me. Okay, okay.

Yeah. All right.

- Is this you, Marge?

- That's me.

Let me get some of that boogie.

- Didn't know you could move like that.

- Because I'm stuck behind a desk.

- Okay, you do have legs under there.

- Oh, yes, I do.

- All right. You are smooth.

- Smooth, baby, reaI smooth.

- Really smooth.

- I'm coming in.

All righty, baby. He's all yours.

- Hey, Office A**hole.

- That's Mr. Office A**hole to you.

Tequila?

Beer, three martinis, and tequila?

No, I don't think so.

Coward.

Bring it on.

You've got the moves.

That's Soul Train for you, baby.

- What you got?

- Wanna see what I got?

- Let's go, let's go.

- Bring it.

You got some moves. Okay, temp.

- Nasty, nasty.

- Hey.

You know,

I wasn't gonna come tonight.

Why not?

I haven't been here that long and...

I'm sure everybody here is happy

that you showed up.

Even you?

What do you mean, "even me"?

I'm your biggest supporter here.

You wanna put one on the cheek?

If you don't, people will

really think something's going on.

Well, we're gonna have

to take that chance then, huh?

Whoa, where you going?

This evening's just getting started.

Sally Sloane. We got Sally Sloane.

You remember her?

She gave us lap dances!

- Sally.

- Derek has singles!

- He has singles!

- I gotta go home, sober up.

You wanna get out of here

and go find trouble?

- No, thank you. No, thank you.

- Where is your holiday spirit?

With my wife and kid.

Gotta take a leak, then I'm sneaking

out of here, alI right?

You're no fun, D. No fun at all.

Lisa, Lisa.

Hey, hey, hey. Stop, stop, stop.

Come on, stop, no.

F***.

You need to stop it.

Who's there?

Stop. Okay. Okay.

Lisa, Lisa.

Oh, God, Lisa, Lisa. Stop. Stop.

Don't do that. Don't...

Stop, stop.

Stop.

Lisa, stop.

Stop.

Stop it.

- What? Derek.

- What the hell is wrong with you?

What's wrong? Derek!

If you don't feel like you can drive,

I have cab vouchers.

Cab vouchers for anybody

who can't drive. Don't want you hurt.

Come on, don't be shy.

Freak.

Well, well, well.

Living dangerously, aren't we?

Patrick, you silly old queen.

Dance with me.

How was it?

The usual, baby.

Anything interesting happen?

No.

Good morning.

Hey. Morning.

- Everything okay?

- Yeah.

Man, you should've stayed.

Roger from Acquisitions tossed

his cookies on the Christmas tree.

Sorry I missed that.

Bad time?

No.

Joe wants to know when you'll

be done with the Ganz portfolio.

Tell him I'll have it to him

by the end of the day.

Thanks.

Sure.

Joe really likes the ladies, huh?

I wouldn't know.

Hey. All right if I take off?

- Yeah. Go home.

- All right. See you tomorrow.

Okay.

Hey, Lisa.

Hey.

I owe you an apology

for the Christmas party.

I think that I sort of took you

by surprise.

Yeah, you know,

we both had a few drinks.

So let's just forget about it.

What if I can't?

Lisa, nothing happened.

All right, have it your way.

Nothing happened.

All right, get out of my car.

Get out of my car right now.

Get out of my car.

Relax.

- Derek, relax.

- Come on. Out of my car.

- Get out of here.

- No one's around to see us.

God. I almost went insane today.

Having to pretend...

...like I was concentrating on work,

when alI I could think about-

Lisa! Get out of my car now!

Derek, what's wrong?

- What did I do?

- Hey, hey.

I don't know what's wrong,

whether you're dense or what...

...but let me telI you something.

There's nothing going on between us.

Nothing! Okay? I wouldn't jeopardize

my job. For chrissakes, I work here.

Stop! Don't touch me. Just get out.

Get out.

- Get out! Come on!

- God!

- Maybe you are an a**hole.

- Yeah, all right. Get out.

Sharon?

Shar?

Something I need to tell you.

What's wrong?

I spent the last hour and a half

talking my sister off the ledge.

- Sheila?

- Can you believe Tim's been having...

...an affair with some random

woman at work for a year and a half?

- How did she find out?

- Tim just blurted it out.

He said he was leaving her.

With three kids.

- Yeah, that's tough.

- It's a disaster. If it were me-

No, that would never be you,

because I would never cheat on you.

I know.

Tim is an a**hole.

Tell me about it.

So, what were you gonna tell me?

What?

You said you had something

to tell me. What is it?

No.

Just a problem at work.

Nothing I can't handle.

Why didn't you tell me?

Honestly, there was nothing to tell.

She grabbed your package,

flashed you in your car.

Come on.

I thought we were best friends.

I cannot believe

you didn't tell me sooner.

- Ben, you think this is funny?

- Yes, I do.

I kind of thought maybe she was

into you a little. I just never figured-

I don't get it. You know, I...

Honestly, Ben.

"Hey, how are you?" I didn't-

I was just being nice.

That's all.

You sure you didn't lead her on?

Just a little?

- No. Not a goddamn thing. Honestly.

- That girl is hot.

- So, what are you gonna do?

- Report it to Human Resources.

You're gonna get her fired?

- I don't have a choice.

- Let's just be careful about this.

What if she says

that you came onto her?

No way.

We're talking history

of behavior here, Derek.

When's the last time you had

a female assistant at your desk, huh?

People are gonna wonder.

- Morning, Mr. Charles.

- Hey.

- Hank back there?

- Go right in.

- Hey, Hank.

- Derek, hey.

- What's up, man?

- Hey.

I have... I have a personal matter

I gotta talk to you about.

You know Lisa Sheridan, the temp?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She worked your desk for a while.

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