On the Beach Page #4

A RELATIVE QUESTION

AT BEST, ISN'T IT ?

IT SEEMS THAT EVERYBODY

I KNOW IS GOING.

I FEEL LEFT OUT.

I CAN SING AND DANCE.

YOU'LL HAVE TO EXCUSE ME.

THE ADMIRAL IS UP TOP.

DON'T YOU GO AWAY.

[ Beeping Morse Code ]

[ Beeping Continues ]

[ Typing ]

IT'S THE DAMNEDEST THING.

STARTED THE DAY:

BEFORE YESTERDAY.

CAME ON AGAIN:

TEN MINUTES AGO, SIR.

STARTS AND STOPS.

WE'VE MONITORED

60 HOURS SO FAR.

IT'S WEIRD.

YOU'RE SURE IT'S

FROM SAN DIEGO ?

WITHIN A 100-MILE RADIUS.

IT'S AS CLOSE AS

WE'RE ABLE TO PINPOINT IT,

WITHOUT TRIANGULATION.

[ Beeping Continues ]

COULD IT BE A KID, SOMEBODY

WHO DOESN'T KNOW MORSE ?

WE'VE MADE TWO WORDS, SIR:

"WATER" AND "CONNECT."

YOU KNOW THE OLD STORY

ABOUT AN INFINITE NUMBER

OF MONKEYS...

AND AN INFINITE NUMBER

OF TYPEWRITERS.

ONE OF THEM HAS TO END UP

WRITING "KING LEAR."

I MAY BE CRACKING UP

UNDER THE STRAIN,

LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE,

BUT THIS INTERESTS ME.

IT'S MORE THAN

JORGENSON'S THEORY.

IT'S A FACT.

IT'S IMPOSSIBLE,

BUT IT'S A FACT.

A RADIO SIGNAL IS COMING

FROM AROUND SAN DIEGO,

AND THEY SHOULDN'T BE.

THERE SHOULDN'T EVEN BE

ANY POWER FOR TRANSMISSION.

HYDROELECTRIC ?

YES, POSSIBLY.

THERE HAS TO BE:

AN EXPLANATION, AND I'D

LIKE TO KNOW WHAT IT IS.

NOT THAT I'LL LIVE

ANY LONGER FOR KNOWING.

[ Beeping Continues ]

HOW WOULD YOU LIKE

TO TRACK IT DOWN ?

I'D LIKE IT, SIR.

VERY WELL, THEN.

I'VE BEEN ON

TO OUR ELECTRONIC WIZARDS.

THEY TELL US YOU HAVE RADIO

DIRECTION EQUIPMENT THAT CAN

BE USED FROM PERISCOPE DEPTH.

IS THAT CORRECT ?

YES.

IT HASN'T BEEN USED MUCH.

WE'LL HAVE TO RUN SOME TESTS.

I'D LIKE I TO BE IN THE PINK.

PERHAPS YOU CAN AMUSE

YOURSELF AROUND HERE

A LITTLE LONGER...

UNTIL YOU'RE READY

TO LEAVE.

[ Beeping Continues ]

[ Laughs ]

HEY !

WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR ?

WE COULD HAVE WON.

THEY'VE HAD IT.

ARE THEY ALL RIGHT ?

THEY'RE ALL RIGHT,

BUT THEY'RE OUT OF THE RACE.

IT'S LIKE LOOKING

AT A FRENCH MOVIE.

[ Laughing ]

DR. FLETCHER ?

WHAT ABOUT THESE PILLS

THEY'VE GOT,

WHATEVER THEY ARE ?

THEY'LL BE AVAILABLE

FROM THE CHEMISTS' SHOPS

ON THE FREE LIST...

WHEN THE TIME COMES.

I UNDERSTAND THAT THEY

HAVE GOT THEM ALREADY...

AT PORT MORESBY AND DARWIN.

APPARENTLY.

WHAT'S THE EFFECT ?

LETHARGY, THEN SOME

EUPHORIA, COMA,

THEN NOTHING.

IN FAIRLY RAPID ORDER.

YOU, UH--

YOU DON'T SUPPOSE YOU COULD

GET ME A COUPLE ?

AND... WH-WHATEVER

IT IS FOR CHILDREN ?

NOT A CHANCE...

UNTIL:

THE TIME COMES.

SORRY, PETER.

I'M BEGINNING TO TWITCH

WHEN I HEAR THE WORD "TIME."

IF FOR SOME REASON--

I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT NOW,

I'M JUST TALKING--

IF THERE'S ONE THING

YOU COULD DO--

NO.

NO, I KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

WHEN THE DENTIS IS DRILLING YOUR TOOTH,

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT ?

THE NICEST THING ?

SEX ? OR WHAT ?

[ Laughs ]

FISHING.

TROUT FISHING:

IN A CLEAN MOUNTAIN STREAM.

YOU WOULD.

WHY NOT GO THEN,

WHEN YOU COME BACK ?

THE SEASON DOESN'T OPEN

UNTIL SEPTEMBER. I'VE ASKED.

YOU THINK I CAN'T FIX THAT ?

YOU THINK I DON'T KNOW

IMPORTANT PEOPLE,

THAT I SPEND ALL MY TIME

WITH THIS MOLDY SUBURBAN SET ?

YOU CAN'T MEAN ME.

SHE NEVER BOTTLED LIKE THA BEFORE. WHAT HAPPENED ?

[ Laughs ]

SHE BOTTLED US.

I WAS TRYING TO WIN.

TAKING THE RACE:

TOO SERIOUSLY, NOT PAYING

ENOUGH ATTENTION TO HER.

TRUTH IS,

HE MADE A PASS AT ME.

I HAD TO GO OVERBOARD

IN SELF-DEFENSE.

WELL, IF THAT--

[ Squeals,

Laughing ]

[ Towers Laughing ]

[ All Chuckling ]

I LIKE TO SEE THE YOUNG FOLKS

ENJOYING THEMSELVES.

[ Laughing ]

WHAT ?

YOU NEVER WRESTLE

WITH ME ANYMORE.

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN ?

I MEAN EXACTLY WHAT I SAY.

YOU NEVER WRESTLE

WITH ME ANYMORE.

ALL RIGHT.

PETER, REALLY.

YOU SAID I NEVER WRESTLE.

NEVER MIND...

FOR NOW.

[ Sighing ]

NOW, TELL THEM THE TRUTH.

BUT I TOLD THEM:

THE TRUTH.

SHARON IS THE MOS TERRIBLE LIAR THAT--

I THINK IT'S ABSOLUTELY

PREPOSTEROUS.

HOW MUCH OF THIS GOULD CAMPBELL

HAVE WE GOT LEFT, STEVENS ?

BETTER THAN:

400 BOTTLES, SIR.

AND IN ITS PRIME.

SHOCKING. SHOCKING !

FOUR-HUNDRED BOTTLES

OF VINTAGE POR IN THE CELLARS...

AND BARELY:

FIVE MONTHS TO GO.

FIVE MONTHS, MARK YOU !

IF WHAT THESE SCIENTIST CHAPS

SAY IS RIGHT.

I THINK IT NEEDS

ANOTHER YEAR, ACTUALLY.

I BLAME THE WINE COMMITTEE

VERY MUCH.

VERY MUCH, INDEED.

SHOULD HAVE HAD:

MORE FORESIGHT.

HOW CAN THE MEMBERS

BE EXPECTED TO GET THROUGH

400 BOTTLES OF PORT...

IN FIVE MONTHS' TIME ?

BAD PLANNING, I SAY.

RIDICULOUS.

I'LL TAKE ANOTHER BOTTLE HOME

WITH ME TODAY, STEVENS.

YES, SIR.

SIR DOUGLAS FROUDE

IS EXPECTING ME.

I BELIEVE HE'S

IN THE BAR, SIR.

THANK YOU.

YES, I'VE HEARD

ABOUT THOSE PILLS.

THIS CRUISE IS DEVELOPING

INTO SOMETHING BIGGER

THAN I THOUGHT.

I MAY NOT BE HERE

WHEN IT HAPPENS.

I UNDERSTAND,

BUT IF DR. FLETCHER

CAN'T GET THEM FOR YOU...

I'M NOT CERTAIN I CAN.

I'VE TRIED EVERYTHING ELSE.

YOU'RE MY LAST HOPE.

YOU'RE CONVINCED YOU WANT MARY

TO HAVE THEM NOW ?

I'VE THOUGHT ABOUT I A GREAT DEAL. YES, SIR.

YES, I DO.

HMM. I'M NOT CERTAIN

YOU'RE RIGHT...

BUT CONSIDERING MARY--

I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH WEIGH I CARRY WITH THE GOVERNMEN IN MY OLD AGE.

THERE'S A LOT OF BUREAUCRACY

STILL, YOU KNOW ?

EVEN IN DEATH.

BUT TAKE THIS AROUND ANYWAY

AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

THANK YOU.

THE WINE COMMITTEE IS MAD,

ABSOLUTELY MAD.

FOUR HUNDRED BOTTLES

OF VINTAGE PORT.

TOO LATE.

TOO LATE.

SORRY, DYKERS.

GOOD SHOW. CARRY ON.

[ Laughs ]

AS A MATTER OF FACT,

THE WHOLE THING IS DUE

TO THE WINE COMMITTEE...

HAVING FAILED TO CONSERVE

THEIR SUPPLIES PROPERLY.

IF THEY'D ONLY REGULATED

THEIR--

OH, HOW NICE.

HAVE YOU NOTICED MOIRA

ISN'T DRINKING SO MUCH ?

I WONDER WHY ?

NO, I HADN'T NOTICED.

PETER ?

MM-HMM ?

COULD WE AFFORD:

AN ELECTRIC MOWER

FOR THE LAWN ?

A VERY LITTLE ONE

I COULD START MYSELF

WHILE YOU'RE AWAY ?

DORIS HAYMES HAS ONE.

SHE DOES ?

WELL, SHE'S CUT THE CORD

THREE TIMES AND NEARLY

ELECTROCUTED HERSELF.

BESIDES, DARLING,

I DOUBT THERE'S ANY LEFT.

WHAT'S THAT ?

SIT DOWN.

SIT DOWN.

THIS IS SOMETHING

I WANT YOU TO KNOW ABOU BEFORE I GO.

YOU'RE GOING TO BE SERIOUS ?

I WISH YOU WOULDN'T.

I WISH:

I DIDN'T HAVE TO BE.

NOW, DARLING, THIS IS

A BIG CRUISE WE'RE GOING ON.

THERE WILL BE MINES

AND ICE TO CONTEND WITH.

PETER, I KNEW WHEN I MARRIED YOU

THAT YOU WERE GOING

TO BE A NAVAL OFFICER.

MY FATHER DIED AT SEA.

YOU KNOW THAT.

WE JUST DON'T HAVE TO

DISCUSS IT, DO WE ?

WE HAVE TO DISCUSS THIS,

MARY, BECAUSE THERE ISN' ANY TRADITION FOR THIS.

PETER--

YOU'RE GOING TO LISTEN

WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT.

NOW, THIS IS

A SPECIAL KIND OF...

SLEEPING PILL.

I HAD A DEVIL OF A TIME

GETTING THEM,

BUT I WANTED YOU

TO HAVE THEM ON HAND...

AND MAKE SURE YOU KNEW

HOW TO USE THEM.

WHAT HAPPENS:

WITH THE RADIATION

IS THAT YOU GET ILL.

YOU START FEELING SICK,

AND THEN YOU ARE SICK...

AND YOU GO ON:

BEING SICK.

YOU CAN' KEEP ANYTHING DOWN.

YOU MAY FEEL BETTER

FOR A WHILE, BUT I ALWAYS COMES BACK.

YOU GET WEAKER.

AND THIS CURES IT ?

DARLING, YOU KNOW

NOTHING CURES IT.

THIS ENDS IT.

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