Ordinary Lies

Season #2 Episode #1

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Upbeat music...

Joe Brierley’s car parking in the large car park of Coopers

Outdoors, a Sports Direct type call centre and warehouse -

taking orders and distributing sports goods to the whole

country.

Other workers park, tread in, we see work couple Caz and

Fletch amongst others.

We go with Joe, as he lets onto people, he is popular - HEAD

OF SALES, he wears suit and tie, but notably, he’s unshaven -

he isn’t naturally a smart guy - he is older than everyone

else that works here, 40s.

2 INT. COOPERS. CALL CENTRE - DAY 1 08.54 2

Music continues...

Joe heading inside, and suddenly we are in a LARGE CALL

CENTRE, THE MODERN OFFICE, small booths in clusters, ‘teams’

sectioned together - desks, phones, computers, everyone has

personalised their space. Everyone wears headsets.

46% of call centre workers are under 30. 10% are over 50. The

rest are in between...

People are already here, talking into headsets, gossiping

with one another, perched on desks. No one wears a uniform,

but most are dressed smart - shirt and tie or nice blouse...

with one or two exceptions, the scruffs...

As Joe heads through he passes a few people who will become

our regulars - Caz Connor, CUSTOMER SERVICE SUPERVISOR

(stunning looking, one half of the office couple, the

Branjelina of Coopers - Caz and Fletch), TELESALES ADVISORS

Ray Finch (a scruff) and Karl Shelvey (ex-army, deadpan,

extremely leftfield)...

JOE:

(for the amusement of the

staff, loudly announces)

So there’s this inflatable school -

it’s got inflatable chairs,

inflatable tables, inflatable

pupils and inflatable teachers...

People turn to listen, love Joe and his morning jokes.

JOE (CONT’D)

But one day someone brings in a

large knitting needle.

(MORE)

Ordinary Lies 2 Episode 1 Pink Amends 2.

JOE (CONT’D)

The head discovers the culprit and

calls him to his office, he says to

the kid, ‘This is totally

unacceptable - you’ve let yourself

down, you’ve let your friends down,

you’ve let the whole school

down...’

Laughter/groans. Joe just carries on regardless. He’s their

boss but he acts like their mate...

...and then, coming this way, a life force, TELESALES ADVISOR

Ally Jones (20s, Welsh, self absorbed in a strangely

endearing way). She holds aloft a poster -

DECREE ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS, Ally’s freedom drinks (with a

photoshopped photo of her being released from chains).

ALLY:

Joe, I’m putting these up, Thursday

night - everyone welcome -

She motions to Karl.

ALLY (CONT’D)

Well, not everyone

Joe just laughs and heads on...

...passing Holly Pryce, early 30s, quirky looking, PA to the

General Manager -

HOLLY:

The promo costumes are here - head

office say everyone, no

exceptions...

JOE:

(grimaces)

Great - so where’s yours

She’s away with a playful smile.

He heads on, to a large glass office - the only part of the

whole space that isn’t open plan. This is the office of the

GENERAL MANAGER, Jennifer ‘Jenna’ Moss - early 30s,

immaculate, pristine. For a long time we won’t penetrate her

business exterior, she is quite unknowable. She exudes

confidence and a kind of perfection -

JOE (CONT’D)

Morning Jenna

JENNA:

Joe - you know today’s

JOE:

(through gritted teeth)

I know, I’m on it

Ordinary Lies 2 Episode 1 Pink Amends 3.

JENNA:

Sorry. Head office...

JOE:

I assume you’ll be wearing one - to

support the troops.

JENNA:

Of course.

She closes her door, no intention of.

Joe heads back to his desk, starts delving through TWO HUGE

BROWN BOXES DUMPED by his desk... his heart sinks as he

rummages...

KIM:

Knock knock.

Joe looks up.

Kim Driscoll is in her 40s, CATERING WOMAN - does the

sandwiches and the trolley, tea truck. She is standing with

a young man, Ash Driscoll (19) - he is black despite Kim

being white - and exudes an attitude that says, ‘My mind is

somewhere else - and all this is bullshit’.

KIM (CONT’D)

My son, Ashton -

ASH:

Ash

KIM:

He’s on work experience. I squared

it with Jenna. He’s going to start

on the phones.

JOE:

Oh, yes - I got an email...

(his desk is a bombsite)

-somewhere... I’m Joe - head of

sales -

They shake hands.

And it has literally taken this long, seconds, for some of

the girls, to clock the fresh meat.

ANGLE - ALLY collaring Caz as she passes - nodding towards

the new blood...

JOE (CONT’D)

I’ll show you to your work station.

Get you started on the induction -

it’s all online, no human

interaction necessary -

He smiles.

Ordinary Lies 2 Episode 1 Pink Amends 4.

JOE (CONT’D)

But... first... very important...

vital in fact...

He delves into one of the HUGE BROWN BOXES. Pulls out a large

smock - shaped like a RUGBY BALL.

JOE (CONT’D)

You have to wear one of these...

Ash unimpressed. Joe pats his arms as he takes it.

JOE (CONT’D)

Welcome to Coopers.

3 INT. COOPERS. CORRIDOR. WAREHOUSE AREA - DAY 1 09.16 3

Joe is carrying one of the boxes out of the call centre

towards the WAREHOUSE AREA, he is being pursued by Ally,

wearing a smock with a huge trainer across it.

ALLY:

Who is he? What’s his name -

JOE:

(alright then -)

Ashton

ALLY:

Ashton, what’s that, where he was

conceived...

JOE:

-hardly Brooklyn is it - he’s Kim

Driscoll’s son.

ALLY:

Kim, trolley Kim? - face on her and

she’s got a kid like that - his dad

must be lush...

Joe pushes through double doors into the WAREHOUSE SECTION -

a huge line of ‘lanes’ in which the stock is boxed and sent

out in vans - there are fork lift trucks present and an open

‘delivery area’ at the rear

ALLY (CONT’D)

Do me a favour Joe, give him a job.

Go on, you can put him on my team.

JOE:

Ally, it might come as a surprise

to you but I don’t assemble teams

on the basis of who might get off

with each other

ALLY:

Please Joe

Ordinary Lies 2 Episode 1 Pink Amends 5.

JOE:

He’s about ten, I don’t think a

soon to be divorced older woman is

exactly what he’s after

ALLY:

Look, I didn’t wanna have to tell

you this but... I wished him here,

cosmic ordering

JOE:

Yeah, well wish yourself back to

your desk and wish yourself top of

the sales team, because right now

you need all the help you can get -

Joe, turns away, shaking his head, despite being their boss

this kind of conversation is totally normal...

As he turns he comes face to face with -

TOKE:

No -

- the WAREHOUSE MANAGER BILLY ‘TOKE’ TOKINGTON.

TOKE (CONT’D)

-just turn around and take them

back where they came from JOE

Toke, it’s head office dictat.

TOKE:

Dictat - what is this - Nazi

Germany...

JOE:

It’s for the website. It’s fun.

‘Fun’. Toke just stares at him.

TOKE:

Tell Jenna, and I quote, ‘you’ve

more chance of seeing a one legged

cat sh*t on a frozen pond’.

JOE:

Okay, okay, fine.

He starts to walk away, then suddenly (playfully) dumps about

ten outfits on the warehouse floor.

JOE (CONT’D)

I’ll leave them there for you

He dashes off. We see WAREHOUSE PICKER Fletch and FORKLIFT

DRIVER Neil, amused. Toke fires after him, grabs them...

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