Paulie Page #2

that she will be.

You tell me.

What do you think we should do?

I just think all this "we love you

whatever you do" is not gonna help.

Great, great. We'll just order

her to stop stuttering? Is that it?

OK, y-y-you are

the fairy godmother,

a-a-and I a-am the princess.

We live in a big castle,

a-a-a-and I have

lots of princess dresses.

OK, fairy godmother,

m-make me talk right.

(Door slams)

A-A-A-A-And p-p-p-please hurry.

All right, Marie. Let's take

your time. There's no hurry, OK?

This is a?

But-ter-fly.

(Chuckles) Ball.

Um, I'll tell you what.

I'll let you take

these cards with you,

and maybe you'll feel more

comfortable practicing at home.

OK, relax.

Take a deep breath.

Let it out slowly.

Now say "house".

H-H-H...

- House, sweetie, house.

- Hey, how are my girls?

Good.

- How's it goin'?

- Good. Very good.

Good.

What are you workin' on?

Cup. That's right.

- Come on. You can say "cup".

- C-C-C...

That's right, baby. You can do

it. Look at me. Watch me. Cup.

C-C-C-C...

Cup.

Lila, just let her say it.

Why don't you just let her say it?

Look, I'm sorry. You keep

saying it for her. Let her say it.

I'm doing my best!

They told you to say the word?

I don't think so. Let her say it.

Am I supposed to leave

her there totally frustrated?

Cup.

- (Dad) Just let her say the word.

- Cup.

C-up.

Cup.

C-Cup.

You did it, Marie. You did it!

(Paulie) 'All it took was one word

and they shut up.

'I wanted to learn more.'

- What's that?

- Ch-Ch-Chair.

That's a chair. Give me some of that.

- F-F-Fence.

- Fence.

Fl-Flower.

- What about this?

- R-Rock.

Rock. What are those?

- Ew, bugs.

- Don't mind if I do. (Chuckles)

I'm going to the store.

Wanna take a ride with me?

N-N-No. Paulie i-i-is helping me...

learn some new words.

No, Bunny, birds don't talk,

and they don't teach, OK?

They just repeat what we say.

They don't understand.

P-P-Paulie understands.

Pretty quiet, aren't you there,

Professor?

I was quiet. I'm sorry I was,

but I was afraid of him.

And that's not all I was afraid of.

Come on. Birds fly.

You were afraid to fly?

I was afraid of heights.

- Until I learned a new word.

- What?

- (Gasping)

- What?

No, no, no...

(Paulie)

'I had no idea what it was.'

Bad idea. Very bad.

(Paulie) 'But something told me

it was hazardous to my health.'

I see claws and teeth and eyes.

And claws and teeth and eyes.

The claws! Look at those claws.

(Paulie) 'So this flea bag

got run of the place,

'and was allowed

to hang out on the couch

'where me and Marie used to watch TV.

'I was banished to

this very uncomfortable coat rack,

'which they called a "perch".'

(Meowing)

- (Meowing)

- Hey, kitty, kitty.

(Paulie) 'And so began

a lifelong trend of speaking,

'when I should've

kept my big beak shut.'

(Paulie) Here, kitty, kitty.

Come on outside.

Come on. We've got some shrimps

on the barbecue for ya.

Right heres. No. Keep... Hey.

Turn around and go outside, you

stupid hair ball. They're calling.

Go on. That's it. Go outside, Muffy

or Pumpkin, or duh...

I don't even know your name.

Uh, go, uh, go dig something up

or bury something.

Why are you coming towards me?

No, you...

That's not good. You don't wanna

be on the furniture.

It doesn't match your coat.

(Chuckles) Get down. Get down.

Get down from the furniture.

Get down. You don't even like salad.

That's...

- Ah! Look out!

- (Meowing)

Come on. Leave me alone, cat!

(Laughing)

I wasn't laughing at you.

Come on. Leave me alone.

- (Hissing)

- Stop!

- Stop it, you bad cat!

- Stupid hair ball.

- Shoo!

- Yeah, shoo!

I don't think she can

tell the difference

between fantasy and reality.

Come on.

You know what she said?

Are you ready for this?

She said the bird told her

the cat started it.

- (Lila) She said that to you?

- Yeah.

Well, she's five years old.

It's her imaginary friend.

I don't know.

She doesn't have any other friends.

She hasn't made

any other attachments.

I just...

I really think that we should

consider getting rid of the bird.

I don't know, Warren.

She loves that bird.

She loves that bird.

(Paulie) Now where we goin'?

You have to learn how to fly, Paulie.

No, I don't want to.

- You h-have to.

- Why?

So in case you ever go away,

y-you can fly back to me.

- Away?

- We h-have to be together, r-right?

- Right.

- Then f-fly.

(Groaning) Oh. You again.

Come on, Paulie. D-Don't look down.

Look at the stars.

N-Now spread your wings.

OK.

Don't look down. You could do it.

If it's so easy, why don't you do it?

- OK, I'll show you.

- All right, come on.

Hey, good shot. You almost got him.

Anything?

Wow.

OK, now spread your wings.

D-Don't look down.

OK, ready? One, two, fly!

Come on. Now, fly. Come on, fly.

Whoa, Marie. Look out!

- Marie! Help us, somebody!

- Help!

It's Marie! Help!

(Marie screaming)

- Oh, baby.

- My God.

(Warren) Are you OK?

(Marie crying)

(Paulie) 'Marie couldn't talk.

The dad couldn't listen.

'The mom couldn't cope.

'So they got rid of me.'

(Marie) Paulie!

(Paulie) Marie.

- Paulie!

- Marie.

Marie, come back.

- Paulie!

- Marie!

- Paulie!

- Marie!

Paulie!

(Sobbing) Fly back to me!

Paulie!

Paulie, I love you! Fly back to me!

(Marie sobbing)

Fly back to me, Paulie!

So they bring you here?

Nah, no. It wasn't that easy

hitting rock bottom.

I did a bunch of things.

First, I did a stint

as a window display

in a place called Bloomingdale's.

And I was in a brochure

for Costa Rica.

I did some work as a magician's

assistant doing children's parties,

but when Zintar fell on hard times,

he had to choose

between me and the cape.

Guess which one he pawned.

# What's new, pussycat,

whoa, whoa, whoa #

Shut up, you goddamn flying rat,

shut up.

# Pussycat, pussycat,

you are delicious

# And if my wishes

could all come... #

May you're uncomfortable in there?

Maybe you need a change.

How about this nice toaster oven

for top brown only?

Come on, Artie.

We haven't pawned anything all day.

Let's catch the number nine

at Belmont. I'm bored.

- You and me both.

- I wanna go home.

Get on line.

Yo, Artie, today is your lucky day.

Right. Fresh outta the showroom,

right? Where's the receipt?

- Lost it.

- Ten bucks.

Ten bucks? Come on, gimme a break.

I'm trying to upgrade

the level of your merchandise.

(Paulie) Hit the brakes, ugly.

Cute. Do you train the bird

to insult your customers?

No, I could tell you're ugly

all by myself.

- How'd he do that?

- He watches television.

What an angle.

I could see how his unique skills

could really...

come in handy

to an intelligent guy, huh?

(Paulie) Yeah, I'll let you know

when I see one.

How much you want for him, Artie?

A lot more than ten bucks, baby.

You'd have to grift for more

than a year to make his numbers.

OK, which of you three

is the proprietor?

Very funny, toots.

What do you got there?

Oh, this is my easel.

It's a very fine one.

My late husband got it for me,

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