Peelers Page #2

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If his stomach gets any bigger,

she won't be able

to find his dick.

- Alright, you boys

behave yourselves.

- There's something

wrong with the beer.

Can we get a round

of Tequila instead?

- Mm-hmm.

- Get ready

for what baby has to offer.

And what a beautiful

specimen she is, folks.

And, luckily, baby can do

her own breast-feeding.

Keep it going for

our beautiful baby.

We know that's the

cradle you'd like to rob.

- Muffin turf?

Really, guys?

- Don't look at me.

- Tony, you're watching Tina

when she goes up tonight.

Apparently her boyfriend's

a jealous douche,

god knows when he'll show up.

- Why can't Remy watch Tina?

- Remy's at the door,

is there a problem?

- Are her b*obs safe?

- As long as they get to

the bag before the tag,

yeah, they're safe.

- What I mean is, do they

have any freaky sh*t goin' on?

You know, I can't

handle funky nipples.

- Yeah, Tony, it can't be

as bad as your funky penis.

- What's wrong with my penis?

- Somebody get

that girl another diaper.

- How am I supposed to top that?

- Easy.

Just take a big sh*t on stage.

- We're gonna take a quick break

so you lushes can

refill those cocktails,

but, don't go too far.

- Panuche?

- And the crowd goes wild.

- You really pissed yourself?

- I piss myself all the time.

It's no biggie.

- Newbie's up.

- Time to go.

- We've got a

virgin, let's not scare her off.

It's Tina.

- Hands.

- Hands, please.

- What, I didn't?

Ah.

- Oh, you disgusting

little pervert.

- Where the hell have you been?

- Nice of you to care.

- You know this is an

important night for me.

- Yeah, for me too.

- Why do you have to

make this so hard?

- You're the one

who's skipping town.

- Logan, we've

been through this.

- Yeah, and it always ends

up with you getting your way.

- Hey, sexy.

- Her, gorgeous.

- You get that brown belt yet?

- You had any doubt?

Frankie, me and Logan are just

in the middle of something.

- Well, don't be

hogging him all night.

- You're just like your dad,

gettin' the ladies

all hot and bothered.

- Yeah?

But he knew the keeper's worth.

That's my cue.

- Oh, what did he do?

- Long story.

- My office.

Evening, Carl.

Come buy our closing night?

- Blue, you know,

it's not gonna be

the same around here without ya.

- Oh, I'm sure you'll

find another place

to harass and annoy.

- The officer is here

lookin' for Logan.

- Is there a problem?

- Probably be best

if we chat with him.

- What's going on, Carl?

- Tell me, blue.

- He stole a car?

- Not just any car, a cruiser.

- Jesus Christ.

- I know Logan's had a hard

time of it, ever since Lucas.

Look, he's a good kid.

He's too smart for his own good.

College has really put his

head in the right place.

- Tina.

What are you doing here?

- Go home.

Go home!

Get off.

Get off me!

- Tony!

- I'm on it!

- Looks like you

got your hands full.

You got it covered?

- Closing night, could

it be any different?

- Come on.

Come on, come on.

- Okay, gentlemen,

most of you know her as

our little feisty Frankie,

but, tonight, she

goes by the name of

thundercunt!

- Come on.

- Stuey, stop it,

you're embarrassing me.

- I'm not the one

standing around

with her tits hanging

out for the world to see.

Tina!

- Oh my god!

- F***.

- I had him.

- You had who?

- I don't know.

He was so strong.

- Who?

- I don't know.

I don't know, he was black.

- Whoa, whoa,

whoa, he was black?

- No, no.

He was covered in black.

I don't know, he

was covered in oil.

Slimy, cold, ice cold.

He slipped out of my hands.

- We need to get Carl in here.

- Hold on.

- What?

- Just hold on, wait a second.

- What?

- I need to check something out.

- Wait, what?

- Guys, clean this up.

- What?

- And go get Carl p*ssy.

- F***!

- You're kidding me, right?

- What?

- I am surprised you

didn't drive here

in the stolen cruiser.

No.

If you think that just

because you and I...

What the hell was that?

- Thundercunt?

- What the f*** now?

- Bar fight.

- Motherfuckers.

- Hey, I won't pick up any puke

from those sons of a b*tches

if they make a mess in there.

- Relax, farmer.

It's just temporary.

- Yeah?

Thankfully, so is

this f***ing job.

- Look, go downstairs, get

something to clean this up with.

- Hey,

tell that beautiful boss of

ours I run out of turf here.

And somebody stole my

f***ing carving knife.

- Where are your friends?

- What?

- Your friends, where are they?

- In the bathroom, why?

- Somebody attacked

one of my girls.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa,

none of my guys would do that.

- Who was covered in oil.

Pisha ranch mine, that's

a coal mine, right?

Right?

- Yeah.

- Petrleo.

Oil?

What's oil doing in a coal mine?

Seems pretty strange to me.

Then again, you're

not celebrating

someone's birthday

here tonight, are you?

- Start talking.

- My crew.

It was the end of our shift.

We were the last

ones down there.

- Santa Maria.

- We were going to

go back tomorrow,

excavate the site, start

to extract the oil.

But it isn't oil, is it?

- What the f*** is goin' on?

- It's not oil.

- Yeah, so?

What's that mean?

- I think it's something

toxic, I don't know.

- I don't follow.

- Well, remember what Tony said.

Oily and slimy to the touch.

- So, what are you sayin'?

Striking oil suddenly

makes you a violent killer?

- What the f***?

- No!

- Okay, this is not good.

I think we should...

- It's too late!

- Something else I got

from dad, good aim.

- What the hell are

you doing with this?

- It's not mine.

This one is.

What the f***, give it back.

Did you see what I just did.

- Hey, we all get

lucky once in a while.

- Lucky?

- Enough, both of you, put

the measuring tapes away.

We have to get

everyone out of here.

- Look, what the fucks

wrong with these guys?

There's black sh*t

all over them.

- I don't know, just

don't touch them.

Okay, hold on to

this sharpshooter.

- It's empty.

- Very good.

I'm going to get the others.

- I'm coming with you.

- No, stay here with the boys.

Look, I'll be right back.

Just make sure you get

everyone out of here safely.

- It's weird.

- Really, which part?

- I shot that guy.

- Wow.

He's quick, folks.

- No, I mean, I

already shot him,

like, three times in

blue Jean's office.

There's no way he

could have survived.

- Sharpshooter my ass.

Alright, everybody, listen up,

we need to get everybody

out of the bar now.

- I can't work under

these f***ing conditions.

I think it sounded

crazy out there,

so I suggest you get out there,

do you f***ing job

like you get paid to,

and see what the

hell is going on.

- Come on, everybody,

clear out, come on.

Come on, let's go.

- Should we call for

back off or something?

- Well, Logan's dead

girlfriend and Carl here

make up for the entire

backup in this town.

Next closest cop is an

hour and a half away.

Welcome to the boonies

population 5,000 and dropping.

- Oh my god, oh my god.

This can't be happening.

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