Peeper Page #7

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Huh? I'm on a retainer.

I do odd jobs for the family.

- What's in the suitcase?

- Odd jobs?

You see, Frank...

Frank asked me to tail you...

when you started

nosin' around askin' questions...

Billy, I think I'm gonna murder you.

Well, come on, Tucker.

Oh, don't get upset. It's just

that you never help me...

but you get in my way.

Now, I could strangle you

or stab you.

Take your choice.

Well, you can't just snuff me out

in here. Be reasonable.

I think that strangling is nicer.

- Don't you?

- I'll talk.

I'll tell you just what's goin' on.

It's... It's Frank and Ellen.

He's got her draining

her mother's estate.

He's blackmailing her.

And I'm reinvesting the funds...

- For Frank and Ellen in South America.

- An odd job?

- Yeah.

- Frank and Ellen or Frank and Mianne?

Oh, Ellen...

Frank and Ellen. Honest.

Oh, hon... Oh, my God!

Look!

That's a cheap trick, Billy!

Excuse me, sir. But have you, by any chance,

encountered an Englishman...

carrying a small tan suitcase?

Yes? What is it, please?

Ship-to-shore telegram, ma'am.

- May I join you?

- How did you find us?

It wasn't easy.

And it's going to get harder.

Well, what a nice place you have here.

You're on thin ice, Mr. Tucker.

- Yes, and I can hear it cracking.

- Tucker, would you like a drink?

- You look an absolute mess.

- You look unusually pretty tonight.

Big ocean liners have that effect on

some women. What's in the funny suitcase?

Funny clothes.

Billy Pate filled me in...

on the gory details of your little

South American investment fund.

- When was this, may I ask?

- Just five minutes ago, so it's fresh news.

- I bumped into him in the lounge.

- On this ship? Billy Pate?

Now, don't tell me.

You didn't know he was on this ship?

I didn't know he was on this ship.

- Frank?

- No. Where is the little rat?

By now, who knows?

Got ya.

What is wrong

with Mummy?

Nothing.

She's under medication.

There are few agonies which

exceed that of seasickness, Mr. Tucker.

Where did you see Billy

exactly, Tucker?

- I forget.

- Don't get cute. It'll clash with your face.

- It's nice and peaceful in here.

- Don't get comfortable, Tucker.

You were just leaving.

- Frank? Throw him out.

- I wouldn't touch him.

Wake your mother up. I wouldn't want her

to miss the best part of the trip.

I can't. She's drugged.

Make your point, Tucker.

Drugged? What have we here?

A little of the "old lady in the wheelchair"

kidnapping trick?

Blimey. I hate this job.

Why is she here?

Is Tucker out of his depth?

In over his head?

When a trained crime fighter has spent

as long on a case as I have on this one...

and has as many facts in his head...

It's just that she shouldn't be here.

- But she is.

- I have it!

I have done it again.

Tucker has such a boyish enthusiasm.

Don't you think, Uncle Frank?

Now don't let this come

as a shock to you, Ellen.

Stop me if I'm wrong.

Frank, you did see Anya.

You told her where she came from...

- And you tried to blackmail her.

- Exactly like I told you he did.

- Frank, lock that door.

- Does it still matter?

It must, right?

Put a call to Tampa, Florida.

Is that possible

from this tub, or what?

It's not a private party.

It's a place of business.

Look, tootsie...

I haven't got all year.

Where are they going?

- Tucker's in there.

- What's Pate doing here?

Ellen!

I think it's time

we had a little talk.

Oh, please sit down, ladies and gentlemen.

Everything is all right.

Please be seated. Everything's fine.

What on earth is going on?

My name is Leslie Tucker.

I'm a confidential agent.

- And this man is my prisoner.

- Are you sure?

Ask him.

- He's ready to talk.

- Put him down. Please, Mr. Plucker.

That's, uh, Tucker

with a "T", ma'am.

What in God's name are you doing

aboard this ship, Margaret?

just a wealthy old lady on holiday.

Any objections?

Excuse me, Mrs. Prendergast.

Have you seen this man here before?

I certainly have.

Mrs. Prendergast,

my apologies for this unpleasantness.

Forgotten. These people are joining

Mrs. Pennypacker and me.

- Can you seat them?

- Yes. How many?

Uh, two, please.

This is Adele Pennypacker.

Adele, this is my brother-in-law,

Frank Prendergast.

- How do you do?

- How do you do?

- And this is Mr. Plucker.

- Leslie Tucker with a "T", ma'am.

- How do you do?

- Oh, what a pretty name.

And this is my dear friend Billy Pate.

- Oh, and this is my daughter Ellen.

- Your daughter? How lovely.

What are you

doing here, Mother?

Billy, tell Frank

and my favorite daughter...

how they've been

magnificently bamboozled.

You know, I always had

a feeling that Billy held the key to this.

I sense you're a fellow

with something to contribute here.

- Pardon me for interrupting.

- That's quite all right, sir.

Mr. Tucker is a private eye.

- Oh, my goodness.

- I've done it again.

Frank did see Anya

and tried to blackmail her...

I know... Exactly like you said he did.

But you got it in the wrong order.

First, he saw the real Anya. When she

wouldn't play ball, he saw the other girl.

- Unless I'm very much mistaken.

- Because a bluff might work.

- Then...

- Thank you, Billy. I can handle this.

Frank gave you the same pitch, but only

after he saw Mianne. And you fell for it.

I know you think you're Anya,

but you're not.

- Who is Anya?

- Mianne, of course.

- Who is Mianne?

- My other daughter.

You see, Adele,

the minute Ellen and funny Frank...

- Enlisted Billy's aid to embezzle my money...

- I must object.

Be quiet, Frank. Billy,

bless his heart, came directly to me.

And he's been my double agent

ever since.

You, Pate, are a worm.

The rest is history.

Excuse me, Mrs., uh, Prendergast...

but at the risk of causing

even more confusion here...

I was hired to do a job by a man

who wanted to make certain...

that a young lady received

a very substantial inheritance.

Now that young lady... turned out

to be your daughter... is Mianne.

So, what I'd like to do, if you don't mind,

is to give you the money...

so that you can give it

to her when she wakes up.

Well, Billy will handle any

and all transference of funds.

An odd job.

Blimey, I hate this job.

Hello. Milkman.

Hello.

You noticed I keep getting

knocked about whenever you're around?

You said you liked excitement.

I remember that distinctly.

- Really?

- Oh, yes. "Dark intrigue"...

Those were your exact words.

You tried to drown me a few minutes ago.

I didn't find that so intriguing.

Don't be so melodramatic, Tucker.

It was a lifeboat, wasn't it?

- Give me that suitcase.

- Tucker?

- What the hell are you grinning at?

- You.

What is it about me that

you dislike so, Tucker?

Well, for the sake of brevity...

You are bad, and I am good.

It is said that opposites attract.

- They say that.

- They do, do they?

Yes.

Give me that suitcase.

Never hit a man with glasses!

You're apt to put out an eye.

- I want that money, Tucker.

- You'll only squander it.

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