People Will Talk Page #6

or in any other fashion.

I don't imagineJohn's been

more than a hundred miles from this porch...

in any given direction.

When you left the farm,

what did you set out to be?

Nothing in particular,

except to be as far from here as possible.

I remained both

throughout my life...

far from here

and nothing in particular.

I was an indifferent journalist,

a minor poet, an ineffective teacher...

and a wretched businessman, unable to

provide properly for my wife and child...

and then not even

for just my child.

When my heart gave way,

it seemed to me...

that my functions had achieved

a unanimous failure.

And so I applied to my brother

for permission to return here with Deborah...

as a complete dependent...

which I am in

every sense of the word...

including being listed as such

in his income tax report.

And now,

if you'll excuse me...

- I'll askJohn about dinner.

- Perhaps it would be better if you didn't.

Please.

I'd consider it a favor.

- Would you like to come inside?

- No. I'll stay out here for another minute.

- I thought you were helping in the kitchen.

- The woman didn't want me.

I can't say I approve

of the company you keep.

The dog is frightened

and unhappy.

He has that in common

with most of humanity.

It's not going to be easy...

what you came here for.

Let's go for a walk.

Sunday ain't Sunday

without chicken.

Two things I guess I did every Sunday

of my life... go to church and eat chicken.

Don't you ever eat chicken

on a weekday?

Only on Sundays.

But if you like chicken so much,

why don't you eat it more often?

'Cause I only eat it

on Sundays.

UncleJohn lives

according to a very strict schedule.

Two things I live by...

the good book and the calendar.

I got a day's work to do

every day in the year.

I take care of my work

and the good book takes care of me.

Then you do the same thing

every day of every year, is that it?

Just like the cows

and horses and vegetables.

That's right.

That's what the good Lord...

and old Mother Nature

put us here for...

to do thejob

they set out for us.

Oh. Well, I can't speak for

the good Lord, of course...

but I know a little about

old Mother Nature.

If old Mother Nature had her way,

there wouldn't be a human being alive.

- How do you mean that?

- I mean, among other things...

that old Mother Nature tries

to destroy us periodically...

by means of pestilence,

disease and disaster.

The human race has been at war

with old Mother Nature ever

since it became the human race.

What do you mean, "Became the human race"?

Is that what you teach?

No, and I'm not really a teacher.

That merely happens to be my opinion.

Oh.

- You make a lot of money?

- John, really, I don't think you...

I don't mind telling him.

Yes, Mr. Higgins.

I make a lot of money... as a doctor...

but then I'm one of

the few fortunate ones.

Huh. I'll say. We got one here in town

works night and day.

- Hasn't got a red cent.

- If you had a teacher here in town...

he'd be a little worse off

than even your doctor.

But then the government

doesn't pay them...

for the patients they don't treat

or the children they don't teach.

Oh, you mean like, uh,

I get paid for not growing some crops.

I never could

figure that one out.

But then I never asked

too many questions about it.

Never look a gift horse

in the mouth. You?

I never look any horse

in the mouth.

Oh. Well, I'm going back

to working on my books.

Then I'm gonna sleep a while

till it's time for my radio programs.

Off my schedule today. Income tax.

I ain't complaining though.

Got more deductions

than I thought.

Doc, do you mind if I put you and your friend

down as a couple of feed salesmen?

Flattered.

Just don't call me "Doc".

That way I deduct

the whole dinner.

Every little bit helps.

I write it all down in a book.

Most of my equipment don't cost me a thing,

writing it off year by year.

- What's it called, Arthur?

- Depletion and depreciation.

Yeah, that's it.

It means it's running down.

- Don't work so good as it did.

- One thing about teachers

and writers and such.

They have less bother with their income tax

than farmers and oil well owners.

That so? Why?

Because their equipment

is talent...

and a highly developed mind.

And when they run down

and don't work so good as they did...

the depletion and depreciation

can't be written off their income tax.

See what I mean?

What's so smart about 'em?

Don't play the radio loud

while I'm sleeping, Arthur.

No, John.

Deborah, why don't you show

Dr. Praetorius the farm?

I'm sure he'd be interested.

Just a lot of depletion and depreciation.

That's all.

Let's see it before

it's all written off.

I'll get a sweater

and meet you outside.

How old were you

when you learned to walk?

I did pretty well

by the time I was four.

- When did you leave the farm?

- When I was 16.

It couldn't have taken you 12 years

to make up your mind.

Do you enjoy music, Mr. Shunderson?

More than anything.

Mr. Shunderson...

Dr. Praetorius has come here

to ask Deborah to marry him, hasn't he?

I wouldn't be surprised.

This, as you see, is the dairy.

The cows are out in the pasture.

Doing the job

the good Lord gave them.

Uncle has eight cows.

That's far more milk, butter and cheese

than what we need. He sells the rest in town.

That makes it a commercial enterprise,

and he can write off...

the dairy and the equipment and the cows...

I think I like the dairy best of all.

It's certainly spotless, isn't it?

The board of health

is very strict about that.

Where do you hide Bella

when they come around, under the icehouse?

Down here,

this room is for the separator and things.

I'd stay out of there

if I were you.

You might get caught

in a room with a dead end.

The milk gets certified,

you know...

according to the amount

of butterfat in it.

Why did you run away

from the clinic?

And this is the separator where the cream

gets separated from the milk.

- Why did you run away?

- It works by centrifugal action.

It used to be done

by just skimming it off.

The cream, being lighter than the milk,

rises to the surface.

- Deborah.

- Because I had to.

- Why?

- I had to, that's all.

- Why?

- Because.

- Why?

- I had reasons.

- What?

- They were private. I don't

have to tell you everything.

Why?

I'm in love with you.

- What makes you think so?

- I can't give you symptoms.

It's love, not measles.

Am I being pompous again?

Well, there are some things

you can't be scientific about.

Even so, why should that make you want to

run away in the middle of the night...

in your bathrobe

and slippers?

- I didn't want to see you the next morning.

- I wanted to see you.

Not if I knew about you what you knew

about me you wouldn't want to.

Possibly. I don't know.

A person just doesn't fall in love that fast,

or that often.

I just couldn't lie there anymore

and think about it. I couldn't stand it.

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