Petulia Page #9

51 EXT. WHARF

Archie hangs up the phone and starts running with his sons toward the boat. He is very pleased with his absolutely nothing phone conversation.

52 EXT. BOAT DECK

Children run scurrying around the mildly crowded deck. The boat is passing Alcatraz Island. Archie and the boys are standing at the rail.

ARCHIE:
They used to think that escape from that prison was impossible.

52A EXT. BOAT DECK

Same scene, different Sunday. Warren and the boys are standing at the rail.

WARREN:
They used to think that escape from that prison was impossible.

52B BACK TO SCENE 52

We resume with Archie and the boys.

MIKE:
Yes, Dad. Warren told us that last week.

ARCHIE:
Warren. Well, we could have gone somewhere else. I didn't know you had been.

STEVIE:
(the youngest) We thought maybe you had never been, Dad.

ARCHIE:
No—well, thanks, actually I haven't been before, Stevie.

MIKE:
In fact, we don't call him Stevie anymore.

ARCHIE:
Who doesn't?

MIKE:
Mom thinks he's getting a little old for being called Stevie, in fact.

ARCHIE:
I called you Stevie two weeks ago—we were all calling you Stevie two weeks ago—I was.

STEVIE:
Before that.

MIKE:
Warren says that Alcatraz taught the world you can get out of anything if you want to bad enough.

ARCHIE:
That's what Warren said, eh?

MIKE:
Yes, Dad.

53 ANOTHER VIEW OF THE BOAT

The boys are watching Archie who is in that section of the boat where the radar and electronic equipment are kept. Archie is on the ship telephone. He is trying to keep a straight face but since he is obviously talking to Petulia, it is difficult.

MIKE:
(to another kid) Doctors can do things like that. Call their patients from wherever they are.

Archie finishes the call and returns to them, smiling.

ARCHIE:
How about clams on the wharf when we get back?

MIKE:
Clams make Steve vomit.

ARCHIE:
Oh.

MIKE:
You forgot that.

ARCHIE:
No, it just slipped my mind.

Archie really does like his kids but his thoughts are somewhere else.

54 INT. A FISH PLACE ON THE WHARF

While Mike and Stevie are gorging themselves, Archie is at the wall telephone.

ARCHIE:
Hello there.

55 EXT. THE BORDER GATE AT TIJUANA–LATE AFTERNOON

During this silent scene we watch Oliver seduce Petulia into giving him a lift in her convertible. Petulia is so bored as the cars take hours to get past the gate. Oliver is an absolute scoundrel. David is such a clod, passing out in the back seat, his legs hanging out over the door of the car, one sandal missing. His beautiful face is somehow an obscene parody of itself, fiery red from the sun.

Oliver mimics David, Petulia, the guard at the gate, dances, skips, romps, annoys Petulia, makes her laugh, dares her, goads her. Finally, when Petulia's car is just one away from the border guard, Oliver impudently hops into the seat beside her, expecting to be thrown out but also expecting maybe a nickel in the bargain. But the joke's on Oliver. Petulia is even kookier than he is. Is it the look of David that sickens her? Is it her annoyance at having to wait so long and do the driving while he lies collapsed and useless? Is it that "useless" that goads her?

Most of all Petulia is doing something of absolutely no importance; she knows Oliver will hop out of the car the moment they reach the guard. All it amounts to is two kooks having a few seconds of horsing around. The joke is on both of them—the guard, harassed by the honking of thousands of cars and having fully inspected the car just ahead of Petulia, waves the convertible on through. Petulia stops the car a few hundred yards past the border to let Oliver climb out, but he just sits there. Petulia thinks, "okay, you little bastard ..." and zooms down the highway, intending to stop at the first moment the look of superior arrogance leaves Oliver's tough little face. During this we hear Archie and Petulia's second telephone conversation, which is as blah and loving as before.

ARCHIE:
Hi, there.

PETULIA:
Hello.

ARCHIE:
I'm having lunch with the boys.

PETULIA:
You eat a good lunch, Archie.

ARCHIE:
I will, I will.

PETULIA:
You only had a cup of coffee for breakfast.

ARCHIE:
I'll eat a good lunch, Petulia.

PETULIA:
Like what?

ARCHIE:
Petulia, they have a thousand different things on the menu.

PETULIA:
You should have a sirloin steak with french fries or baked beans.

ARCHIE:
Okay.

PETULIA:
That's easy to say, Archie. But I know you.

ARCHIE:
Steak with french fries or baked beans.

PETULIA:
Do they have fresh sea-food?

ARCHIE:
Yes.

PETULIA:
Sea bass is nice.

ARCHIE:
Yes, sea bass is great.

PETULIA:
If they grill it.

ARCHIE:
I'll have grilled sea bass.

PETULIA:
Unless they do a nice omelet.

ARCHIE:
I'm sure they would if I asked.

PETULIA:
It's such a problem.

ARCHIE:
Yes, I know. Goodbye, Petulia.

PETULIA:
Phone.

56 INT. FISH PLACE

Archie laughingly hangs up. He goes back to his kids.

57 EXT. FORT WINFIELD SCOTT–DAY

The sign says all the dreadful penalty of being caught in the fort. Archie takes the boys in.

ARCHIE:
Warren take you here?

MIKE:
No.

ARCHIE:
He would see the sign, eh? See ...

57A INT. FORT ROUND THE GALLERIES

The boys whoop off up some stairs.

STEVIE:
Hey, this is great.

Archie chases them through the floors.

Archie sees a telephone above which is a sign which says that this phone is for the military and is to be used only in emergency. Archie approaches it warily, then loses his nerve and turns back to his kids. Archie wants to get back to Petulia.

58 EXT. FORT BARRACK FLOORS–DAY

ARCHIE:
Alright?

The boys look at him uncertainly.

ARCHIE:
(continuing) It's ten to two. Can you imagine that? The time really went!

The boys know that means he wants to take them home.

ARCHIE:
(continuing) I'm really bushed.

MIKE:
(coldly) I feel okay.

Stevie is willing to let his dad off the hook.

STEVIE:
I been sneezing.

ARCHIE:
So I noticed.

MIKE:
He's always sneezing.

ARCHIE:
Hey, next week I want you guys over for the entire weekend. None of this three or four hour stuff.

STEVIE:
All weekend?

ARCHIE:
Why not?

MIKE:
To do what?

ARCHIE:
You just wait!

Stevie is instantly excited.

STEVIE:
Something really interesting?

ARCHIE:
Bet your life!

MIKE:
What?

ARCHIE:
Just leave it to me:

MIKE:
Warren said something about the Roller Derby.

ARCHIE:
Oh.

STEVIE:
Friday night till late Sunday?

ARCHIE:
Unless you guys don't want to.

MIKE:
The Roller Derby's pretty darn interesting.

ARCHIE:
Yeah.

MIKE:
We'd have to sleep over. I mean if we were going to spend the whole weekend.

ARCHIE:
I want you to

MIKE:
(suddenly) Well, it's fine by me.

STEVIE:
Me too! Boy!

ARCHIE:
Okay, it's a deal!

Mike turns away.

STEVIE:
He's going to cry, I guess—he does that.

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