Phoebe In Wonderland
Happy birthday.
The next rule is:
"Good Job Jenny asks questions...
...only when it's time
for asking questions."
How will we know
when it's time for questions?
What did I just say
about asking questions?
But...
You may ask
when you can ask questions...
...when it's time
for asking questions.
Huh?
In this classroom,
we have some rules.
These are the same rules
we had last year.
Is that a question?
Class, what is the rule
about asking questions?
What do we know about
Good Job Jenny?
She deserves a slow
and painful death.
Anyone?
"'T was brillig...
"and the slithy toves
did gyre and gimble in the wabe.
"All mlmsy
were the borogoves...
...and the mome raths outgrabe."
That's Miss Dodger,
the new theater teacher.
Attend the tea party.
Writing?
Summoning the courage, failing.
Blackthorne's gonna publish me.
Oh, Peter.
It's a tiny academic press.
No, that's great.
Nobody'll read it.
It's great.
It is great.
It's the greatest thing
in the history of great.
I think you are.
Till I shrivel up
with resentment?
How was your day?
Good.
The girls?
Terrific.
I don't know
how you do it.
So yourwork examlnes
Alice in Wonderland?
Well, actually it's...it's...
"I have angst.
Sincerely, Olivia."
How does a seven-year-old
have angst?
You don't know the half of it.
Mozart was six when he wrote
his first opera.
I'm seven.
Well, he's only got a year
on you, sweetie.
You don't understand.
See?
A house of women
speaking their minds.
And...and her poetry,
it's like E.E. Cummings...
Phoebe too,
these rhythms and rhymes...
...and internal monologues.
You've never seen
anything like it.
Hillary is a terrific mother.
Mm, well...
Oh, no, please,
I insist, let me.
Thank you.
How's the book coming along?
Precarlous Enchantment.:
Wonderland and Perverslon,
right?
God, how awful.
So...
Well, sometimes I actually have time
Remember that next tlme
you cry, baby.
But don't you love
belng a mother?
God, yes.
Break your mother's back.
Step on a crack,
break your mother's back.
Step on a crack,
break your mother's back.
Step on a crack,
break your mother's back.
Is that a Patriot Girl doll
in your locker?
Katherine,
girl of strength and spirit...
...growing up in Philadelphia
during the American Revolution.
I had her.
I stuck needles
in her eyes.
I have Mary.
Mary, she's a Patriot Girl too,
except British.
She escaped the bombing
of London during World War II.
I know who she is.
She's a loser.
You think?
"You think?"
What are you looking for?
Money.
Yesterday I found a dollar.
I'm saving up
for Sings With Birds...
growing up in 1732.
Do you want
my Katherine one?
Thanks, but I have it.
No!
No, don't touch me!
- No!
- I got you!
No, you didn't!
I'm not it!
Yes, you are.
No, you don't understand.
I can't be it.
Please don't make me be it.
Phoebe's it!
No!
I'm sorry.
Please don't tell.
Miss Reiter...
Phoebe spit at me!
Phoebe, it's only a game.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to.
Something's going on
with Phoebe.
Because she got upset
during tag?
She spat.
As I understand it,
all the other kids were running at her.
They were playing tag.
Exactly, it seems
pretty innocent to me.
It was the way it happened.
This is why little boys
who kiss little girls...
...get expelled
for sexual assault.
- All right, Hillary.
- No, I'm sorry.
It's just, we want
our kids to care...
...and then we worry
when they do.
We want them to show spirit,
and then punish it.
I really don't see
the problem here.
Is there something
going on at home?
I'm finishing a book.
That's about it.
Anythlng else?
Children are good at hiding.
No.
Do you think that something's
going on with Phoebe?
with Phoebe.
She's different.
That's good.
But do you think...
No, I think it's just
the way they are.
This god damn
what-to-expect-this-second parenting.
You ever wonder if we're
too tuned in to our kids?
She wasn't accusing you
of anything.
Of course she was.
I hope Phoebe got her
with a good loogie.
Maybe I'm not spending
enough time with her.
We work.
Right?
I'll figure out
something special.
Please take you seats.
Look at the chandelier.
Thank you.
I can't wait.
I know.
Go.
Come on.
Here, take off your coat.
Oh, It's startlng.
She's changing.
The swan is turning
into a princess.
Look.
Why'd she take off her dress?
It's just her costume.
If I had a dress like that,
I'd never take it off.
You'd have to,
to wash it.
No, 'cause maybe
if I wore it long enough...
...one day I'd wake up,
and I'd be that person.
Smart girl.
You'd have to choose
your part carefully.
Oh, I would.
Believe me, I would.
Hey, don't look.
No room, no room.
I'm here to try out
for the play.
I'm the Mad Hatter.
This is the March Hare,
and that's the Dormouse.
Whatever.
I want to be Alice,
and I always get the lead.
How strange everything is today.
Let me think.
Was I the same
when I got up this morning?
Thank you.
Wouldn't you like to attend
Alice.
Right.
Dive in.
How strange is everything today.
Let me thlnk.
Was I the same when I got up
thls mornlng?
I'll make a killer Alice.
I look just like her.
Just Alice.
My daddy is sick rich.
I want Alice...
...and you should know
that I'm a depressive.
No room, no room.
Excuse me?
Oh, may I have some tea?
Welcome to the tea party.
A gift?
Most recently,
I did two seasons...
...in the Essex Playhouse
Theater Arts Workshop.
Indeed.
In The King and I,
I was featured as Phra Alack...
...the head servant.
Hmm.
Which role would you like
to try out for...
...the King of Hearts,
the White Knight?
The Queen of Hearts.
Unless...
No, no, no, no, no.
Please, be my guest.
Off with her head.
Phoebe Lichten?
Here.
Your tea party was scheduled
for 20 minutes ago.
"Your tea party was scheduled
for 20 minutes ago."
Sorry.
I'm so sorry.
I was washing
my hands.
I suppose you want to read
for Alice.
Hmm.
How strange everything
is today.
Let me think.
Thank you.
- That's it?
- That's it.
You don't want me
to read anymore?
No, thank you.
Can I please try it again?
That won't be necessary.
I'm sorry I was late.
I really am.
I had to...
I have to wash my hands
You can try again,
a little slower.
Go on.
Jump.
How strange everything is today.
Let me think.
Was I the same
when I got up this morning?
feeling a little different.
But if I'm not the same,
the next question is...
...who in the world am I?
How'd your tryouts go?
How'd you find me here?
I made thls house.
It took a whlle.
How'd it go?
I think mine went well.
I practiced forever.
I was better at home.
Auditions are stressful.
When I wanted my baklng klt...
Is that what you have to do?
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"Phoebe In Wonderland" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 21 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/phoebe_in_wonderland_15851>.
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