Pirates of Silicon Valley Page #5

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You make people need you.

You survive because

you make them need what you have.

And then they have nowhere else to go.

Right now we're dead.

- Nobody needs us.

- So we make them need us?

We're too small even to matter.

We could be snuffed out tomorrow.

and no one would notice.

You know what they say in the Mafia?

You keep your friends close

but your enemies closer.

Which enemies are you talking about?

I got some full barf bags here.

Full barf bags. Heads up.

- He's sick.

- Bald guy with barf bags.

Coming through. Full ones too.

How you doing?

Come on.

- My tie. I forgot my tie.

- Great. Bill. We're already late.

Hey. how you doing?

Ten bucks for your tie. Okay. 20.

Thirty. Come on. come on.

Thirty. Thirty bucks for that tie.

Where did you get that. Sears? Come on.

Help us out here. Would you? Please?

You see, by that time,

Bill had already figured out...

...that we gotta go right into the belly of the

beast. The scariest beast of them all, IBM.

IBM. And back then, man, they were like

Attila the Hun, Genghis Khan...

...and Vlad the Impaler all rolled into one.

Bu! what we were gonna do was,

we were gonna make them love us.

Gentlemen. how are you? Nice tie.

- Thanks.

- We're over here.

Our shirts are as white as theirs.

We think we have what you need.

That's a start.

Now. we know that IBM has set up

this place to compete head-on with Apple...

...and you're gearing up to come out with a

personal computer that will wipe them out.

So we can get you an operating system.

What kind of operating system?

It's called...

...DOS.

This is amazing.

Not just amazing. it's historic.

It should be taught

in all the history books.

I mean. hung and framed

in the National Gallery or something.

Because this is the instant of creation...

...of one of the greatest fortunes

in the history of the world.

I mean. Bill Gates is the richest guy in the

world because of what started in this room.

You wanna know what else?

It wasn't exactly smoke and mirrors.

but we didn't have anything.

I mean. not a damn thing.

Here we were. this two-bit little outfit...

...telling IBM we had the answer

to their problems.

DOS? The Disk Operating System?

To make all those zillion

IBM computers compute?

We didn't even remotely own

anything like what Bill was selling them.

Nada. zip.

Of course. we don't just

wanna sell it to you outright.

We wanna be able to license it to you.

- You want to retain ownership?

- Right.

Well. the profits are in the computers

themselves. not this software stuff.

No big deal.

Oh. and one other thing.

We have to be able...

...to sell it to other outfits.

But...

...there was just one little problem.

Bill. why did you tell them

we have an operating system?

We don't have a thing to sell them now.

We're dead.

- We're not. You'll give us the miracle. right?

- Oh. yeah. right.

Well. come on. You said you knew a guy

we could buy an operating system from.

I said I sort of know him.

Sort of? You heard me.

Don't tell me sort of. I just told IBM.

Sort of.

- Here you go.

- Thanks.

So basically. you're saying

you wanna buy my operating system.

Yeah.

Why?

You know. I don't know. We just think we

might be able to mess with it and resell it.

Who to?

We have a few customers, you know.

we're sort of talking to.

Some of them don't want it known

what we're doing.

So they made us sign

a secrecy agreement.

- And you're offering us...?

- Fifty thousand.

- Dollars?

- Dollars.

You worried?

Oh. no. Only my whole life hangs

in the balance. Me. worried? No.

We got IBM.

IBM. I mean. come to think of it...

...why would IBM wanna make a deal

with a bunch of bozos like us?

Because they're successful, Ballmer.

Success is a menace. It fools smart people

into thinking they can't lose.

So?

So. you mute moron?

Can you hear it? The sound of money?

The roar of money. It was like everywhere

you turned, money poured down.

Millions and more millions.

All because we bought that guy's

operating system for a measly 50,000 bucks.

That fueled a worldwide explosion of wealth

unlike anything in the history of man.

But you know something?

Having money and being cool

are not necessarily the same thing.

- Hi. I'm Bill Gates--

- Hey.

What in the?

Hi.

You know. you should really watch

where you're going.

You must have really great bandwidth.

- Excuse me?

- What are you doing later?

Who is that jerk?

Way to go, hotshot.

When Paul and I were at Lakeside.

we were in 10th grade together...

...we rigged a computer so we could

get classes with all the best girls.

Obviously. it's been downhill since then.

You should walk around with your bankbook

hanging from a chain on your belt.

Or maybe you ought to stop yelling

in front of your employees.

Girls don't like yelling. They like cool.

Oh. really. Ballmer?

How do you get to be cool?

I don't know. You saw

Saturday Night Fever. Travolta's cool.

I'd like to welcome all of you to the new

headquarters and home of Apple Computers.

All of a sudden. Steve was a huge star.

The kind where people practically

hang on your every word...

...like they're excited

just to be around you.

Thank you very much

for joining us today on this lovely day...

...and helping us stop the gossip rumors

in their tracks.

Without further ado.

the rumors are true.

Ladies and gentlemen.

our new president. John Sculley.

To tell you the truth. I was perfectly happy

to be president of Pepsi-Cola...

...until Steve Jobs came to recruit me

and said:

Do you wanna sell sugared water

for the rest of your life...

...or do you wanna make history?

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

- I know.

- Yeah. operator.

- I need information for Oregon.

- Okay. give me a minute.

Steve. I gotta talk. I don't know how

to act in situations like this.

- In a minute.

- I mean. Steve. that stock-offering thing?

A hundred million dollars?

- What do you do with $116 million?

- In a minute.

I don't think rich. okay? I know a lot of

people think rich. but I don't think rich.

I mean. maybe you learn it. but. ieez.

$100 million. That's a lot of learning to do.

I hardly ever had enough for lunch

before all this.

We should have given stock

to the other guys. Steve.

Like Dan?

Dan's been with us since we started...

...and you didn't set aside

any stock for him.

Steve.

- I'm gonna give Dan some of my stock.

- Yeah. is Arlene there?

We gotta do the right thing.

Arlene? Okay. fine.

Let's talk about this baby.

Steve. why do you care

what I call the baby?

Because I don't want

the baby named Rainbow.

Or Orisha or Ravi Shankar

or any other name like that.

Steve. not right now. okay?

Well. when the hell ls a good time to call?

Because every time I try

Steve.

- Do you want me to take that?

- Thank you.

You're welcome.

Hi.

Hi.

So I just came by to make sure

everything's okay.

- Everything okay?

- Thank you.

And to...

...make sure that you're not

gonna name it some weird name.

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