Postcards from the Edge Page #7

- Handle it? How do you handle it?

My drinking does not

interfere with my work.

I wish my mother had been as concerned

about me when I was a little girl!

Will you tell me what awful thing

I did to you when you were a child?

- You want to know?

- Tell me!

Fine. From the time I was 9

you gave me sleeping pills!

It was over-the-counter medication.

- You couldn't sleep!

- You don't give kids sleeping pills.

They were not sleeping pills!

It was store-bought and it was

perfectly safe!

And don't blame me

for your drug-taking!

I do not blame my mother

for my misfortunes or for my drinking.

You don't admit you drink!

How can you blame her

for something you don't even do!

Remember my 17th birthday party

when you lifted your skirt up...

- ... in front of...

- I did not lift my skirt!

It twirled up!

You only remember the bad stuff.

What about the big band I got to play?

Do you remember that? No!

You only remember that my skirt

accidentally twirled up!

And you weren't wearing underwear.

Well...

Dear, I am sorry if you think

I hurt you.

Everything I did,

I did out of love for you.

I might've done wrong sometimes.

How can you do everything right?

Can we...? Let's just stop.

I made some mistakes, but I'm human.

- Where are you going?

- To cut an album.

I'm gonna go have

some fibroid tumours removed.

I'm going to f***ing loop.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

What are you sorry about?

- I thought I was late.

- No.

We didn't expect you for half an hour.

Oh, well, so, is it okay now?

Yeah, it's okay now.

Victor, Miss Vale is here.

Would you put up her reels now, please?

Wasn't that simple?

Oh, excuse me. Suzanne, this is

our editor, Phil Hartley...

...and sound editor, Elliot Morse.

Ready, Lowell.

Thank you. Shall we begin?

Could I have some coke...

... a-cola? Please.

- Could you get Suzanne a Coke, please?

- Sure.

You're better in the film

than you deserve to be.

Good. I mean, thank you.

I'm sorry I was such a nightmare.

You seem better now.

Really? No, I don't.

- Better because you're sober...

- Worse because I'm sober.

Yes, but worse in a good way.

- Here you go.

- Thank you.

We have more spirit

and resources than you.

All it'll cost us is money.

There isn't enough mommy in the world

to further your cause.

Sh*t.

That's as good as it got all day.

We never got a full take after that.

I know. I'm sorry.

Don't be sorry, just fix it.

What?

Okay, let's try one.

Could I get a level from you, please?

There isn't enough money in the world

to further your cause.

Bring it down a little.

Can you try again, please?

- Good.

- Okay, let's do it.

Can I do another?

I have to do it one more time.

Let's look at that.

Perfect.

Will you guys take...?

Take five minutes, will you, please?

Thank you.

What could possibly be the matter?

You've gone back and corrected

the past, at least in your work.

What could be a better metaphor?

It couldn't be something I said.

Nothing you say to me is as horrible

as what I say to myself.

And at least it's outside my head

where I can deal with it.

You've had it too easy

and you don't know it.

No, no. I do know it.

You're not gonna get

a lot of sympathy.

People would give their right arm

to lead the kind of life you lead.

I know, but the trouble is,

I can't feel my life.

I can't feel it. I see it all

around me and I know...

...that so much of it is good.

But I just take it the wrong way.

It's like this thing...

...with my mother. I know she does

all this stuff because she loves me...

...but I just can't believe it.

And other stuff.

I don't know about your mother.

Maybe she'll stop mothering you

when you grow up.

- You don't know my mother.

- I don't.

I know you can make

a mother out of anybody.

Look, your mother did it to you,

and her mother did it to her...

...and back all the way to Eve.

At some point, you stop it and say:

" F*** it. I start with me. "

Did you just make that up?

I was working on it before you came.

If you were half an hour later...

...it would have been better.

It's pretty good as it is.

It sounds like movie dialogue.

That's me. I don't want life to

imitate art, I want life to be art.

Look.

Look at that.

See what you can do?

You weren't even conscious then,

for chrissake.

Imagine what you could do now.

Maybe I should just...

...go back to the clinic?

Growing up isn't like in a movie...

...where you have a realization

and life changes.

In life, you have a realization and

your life changes a month or so later.

So I just have to wait a month?

It depends on the realization.

Some of them you only wait

a couple weeks.

Look...

...you're better here coping

than in a clinic giving up.

You're gonna be out here

eventually coping anyway.

So why don't you start now?

Anyway...

...you can't go to the hospital.

I've got a job for you.

You wouldn't be ashamed

to work with me again?

It doesn't start for a few months,

so you have time for realizations.

Grow up. Leave your mother.

Thank you, God.

What happened?

Lady plowed into a tree.

Where's the lady? Is she all right?

- Who are you?

- I'm her daughter.

She hit her head.

She's at Canyon Medical Centre.

Look, I'm afraid we had to book her

for driving under the influence.

Thank you.

May I help you?

Miss Vale. Your mother's getting

patched up. I'll take you to her.

I'm afraid the press has been alerted

to your mother's presence here...

- ... and her arrest.

- Oh, great.

Doctor, this is Miss Mann's daughter.

Your mom's fine. It's a slight

contusion. A superficial wound.

- Can I see her?

- Yeah. Sure, sure.

She's more frightened than anything.

There she is, my other monster.

I can't seem to keep you two out

of the hospital lately.

She's fine.

She just bumped her head is all.

She was worried about you.

She got into her car and backed

up a tree.

Why am I in this family?

I got a wino daughter

and a doped-up granddaughter.

Oh, sure. " Cry all you want. You'll

pee less," as my grandma used to say.

I swear. I don't know where

you get it from. But you!

You're just spoiled.

You've thrown everything away.

I told you not to bring her

up that way. Would you listen?

Don't run to me now.

I got my hands full with Grandpa.

Oh, shut up, Grandma.

- I beg your pardon?

- I should think you would.

If you'd washed her mouth out

with soap when she was little...

I'm simply suggesting that we all

try to enjoy each other...

...without having to assign blame.

Listen to Miss Snooty Britches,

"assign blame. "

Come on!

- What're you doing?

- Moving you to the waiting room.

No need to shove! I'm going!

You need a good pop on the butt

like I used to give your mother!

Yap, yap, yap, yap.

If I thought I made you feel

like that, I'd kill myself.

Don't say that, even in jest.

Particularly in a hospital,

people might take it wrong.

I suppose she means well.

She sounds like the voice in your head

that tells you you can't do anything.

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