Prevenge

---

1

- Hi Mr..

- Zabek.

- Zabek.

- Yeah, that's right. Yeah, yeah.

- Find it alright?

- Yes, I'm so sorry. I was...

No, don't worry. Traffic's

murder around here.

Did you find somewhere to park?

Yes, yes I did. Yeah.

Well, take a look around,

you know.

Yes it's er...

It's quite a place here, innit?

Look at these two, eh?

Oh my. Are they real?

Yeah. They're Indonesian.

See they're a couple.

- They're a pair.

- Oh yes.

Oh yeah.

They come together.

You know what I mean.

The big ones have been

known to eat sheep.

And they have eaten kids.

How do they get them in their

mouths?

Well, you know, they just open

their mouth and...

I like them

I just -

I have to admit I'm really

nervous.

Why you doing it then?

Oh it's not for me.

It's for my kid.

Oh okay. Obsessed is he?

- Yes.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah,

They're like that,

aren't they, little boys.

They get obsessed with things.

They're obsessed with spiders

and then lizards and..

- Guns

- Guns, yeah, all that.

Here, look at this.

What can we see in there?

That is my big fat snake.

Oh yes

Looks quite slimey doesn't it.

But it's not.

It's very smooth.

Do you want to touch it?

No.

Right.

Say hello

to my little fat furry friend,

- Penelope.

- Well you see my son's eight.

And...

I think really he'd like

something very special.

Well I can show you

my private collection.

If you like.

Yes?

- Yes please

- Yes.

OK...

Watch the maggots.

Horrible, horrible little

things...

What do you think?

I - I don't know what I'm

looking for.

She's pregnant

- Like me

- Like you.

Beautiful...

Now I can't make you hold her,

but, there's one down here

which you will be holding...

Where are you, little b*tch.

Come here.

Come and say hello.

Come on.

Is she dangerous?

Yes...

Come on.

Where are you?

Come out and get on with it.

Listen, Mummy.

That's how I was made.

You can forget about that

ever happening again.

Selfish bastards.

No considerations.

We may as well not exist.

But shh,

I'm here.

I have mascara days like that.

Very smudged.

This is not going to hurt one

little bit.

- They said that last time.

- Did they?

It did hurt and I had

a massive bruise.

It was, like, here to

about there.

Oh poor you.

That's not very good is it.

Probably not in control of their

apparatus like nurse Jennifer.

Lovely. So,

I managed to track down

your records,

you're not very easy

to track down.

I felt a little bit like

Sherlock

and you was like the

disappearing woman.

Lady Lucan I think we'll

call you from now on.

Yeah, can you just call me Ruth?

Yes, of course. Ruth.

So...

Did you know that if you hear a really

high pitched sound later on in pregnancy,

you can just start spurting

milk from your b*obs?

Like two rockets. It's like

boom, boom, pow!

It's quite magical.

Why are you telling me that?

Just so that you know

you have absolutely no control over

your mind or your body any more.

This one does.

She's got all the control now.

She'll be coming...

OK, so I didn't have much time

with the notes.

Phyllis gave them to me this

morning.

What does your partner do, Ruth?

Oh.

Oh.

I'm very sorry.

I didn't know, I wasn't aware.

Well how would you know because you

don't actually know me do you?

No.

It's very important to let the

past stay in the past.

It's just nature's way.

I think nature is a bit of c*nt

though, don't you?

Oh, negativity is not good for

the baby's spirit.

- Do you think?

- Yes,

I think it's good to try to

stay positive...

And at the end of the day

you've got this force of

nature now inside you.

Baby knows what to do.

Baby will tell you what to do.

I think she already does.

Erm, it's just here.

Scream if you want to go faster.

It's DJ o'clock.

Empty. Dead

Like a graveyard.

The atmosphere in here

tonight is electric.

Can I get a big oy-oy?

Remember, guys, tickets

available for Halloween.

Raise your hand if you want one.

They're available at the bar.

Any requests, come up to the

booth.

I've got nearly every song.

Alright?

Y'alright?

- Do you want a drink?

- Eh?

Do you want a drink?

No, I'm alright. I don't

drink on Tuesdays.

- You don't drink on a Tuesday?

- No.

Why?

No, I have a code. And I don't

drink when I'm up there.

- Are you a p*ssy?

- What?

Are you a p*ssy?

Jesus Christ.

If it will shut up.

- YOLO

- What?

YOLO.

- What's that mean?

- You only live once.

That's actually something I

always say to people.

- Really?

- Yeah, it's something of a motto of mine.

So yeah, I'll drink to that...

Actually tasted like water.

Do you want another one?

You trying to get me drunk?

Yeah.

You're a bit forward aren't you?

Some might say.

Alright, I'm just going to lay my

cards on the table here because

I don't want to lead you up

the garden path.

But I'm not after a relationship and

I'm not after any sort of girlfriend

or any baggage to carry round

with me.

So, I'm sort of a bit too young

for all that sort of stuff,

you know? I'm still playing the game,

I'm, you know, still a weekend warrior.

If you're after something a bit

more serious

because your body clock's clicking

on and all that sort of stuff..

Then it ain't me, I don't want

any part of that.

You couldn't be more wrong.

- Oh really?

- We're the same.

You don't know anything

about me.

I know enough. I've been

watching you

- Oh have you?

- Yeah

What do you see?

I like what I see.

Oh yeah?

Yeah.

John, can I get another - actually

I tell you what, let's get four.

Couple of shots there, girls?

The thing is I want to get the girls

beyond there a drink as well, you know.

Just so I'm not putting all my

eggs in one basket...

Girls, come on.

That's it. Lovely. Look at that.

1, 2, 3. Here we go...

That was nice wasn't it.

Oh gosh. I'm so sorry.

F***ing hell.

What's wrong with them?

They're both really pretty. I mean,

definitely prettiest girls in here, but,

neither of them want to... You know, they've

just like got no banter, have they?

They don't know what they're missing

out on, do you know what I mean?

Yeah, I mean, I was thinking of

that in my own head.

Yeah, well I love your music.

- Do you?

- Yeah

- Do you like 70s music then?

- I love 70s, 80s

- Do you?

- Yeah.

It's my favourite too. 70s is

where my heart is.

You know what I really admire

about you?

Go on.

You know your onions.

Well that's a really nice

thing for you to say.

I thought you were probably going

to say something about my clothes

or my face or something.

You look a bit familiar.

- You from around here?

- No, no.

Met you before?

Don't think so. I'd have remembered.

Shall we get another drink?

No, no that's good. Get her a -

- Red wine

- Really?

- I'm on the dark side.

- Well if it's fun that you're after,

you've come to the right place.

Show me what you've got.

I f***ing love fat birds.

You know?

F***ing really like them.

You've got a little bit more

about you.

You're a little bit more open

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes