Princess Protection Program Page #3

Have you ever tried one?

Yes. And FYl,

they have hamburgers in lowa.

Oh!

Right.

-You're supposed to be blending in.

-I am blending.

Speaking fluent French in class?

And eating hamburger

like you're having tea with the Queen?

-Well, how else should it be eaten?

-Like this.

The works.

There you go.

Mmm-hmm.

Stop.

Now.

-Like this?

-It's perfect.

Can I have your attention, please?

I have an announcement to make.

Can we sit down

and settle down, please?

On Monday,

we'll be taking nominations

for the homecoming court.

These nominees must be girls

of exemplary character.

Kind, intelligent,

honest, charitable members

of the Lake Monroe community.

Now, the three girls

with the most votes

will become

your homecoming princesses.

There's more, there's more.

On Friday night, at our annual dance,

one of these lucky girls

will be crowned

your homecoming queen

of Lake Monroe High.

Yeah!

Thank you.

You vote for royalty here?

We're a democracy. We're into voting.

So then, anyone can be a princess?

Even you?

Theoretically.

Excuse me, everyone.

May I have your attention?

-What are you doing? Sit down!

-No, no.

I would like to nominate my cousin,

Carter Mason, to be your queen.

I think that she would

make an excellent ruler.

Carter?

Yeah, right.

-Carter. Carter!

-Carter? That's hilarious.

Was that for real? Wow!

Oh, man.

Looks like I'm the queen.

Carter!

-Carter!

-Leave me alone.

I order you to stop.

You order me? You order me.

I order you to take a long walk

off a short pier.

You cannot order me to do anything.

Wanna bet?

You're in my kingdom now.

Okay, hey, hey, hey. Whoa, whoa.

Whoa, what's going on?

Dad, she can't do it.

She can't act normal.

-I am normal.

-Really? Okay.

So, a normal person who has

never seen a hamburger before

can order one in six languages?

Really? You did that?

I always speak to my staff

in their native tongue.

They're not your staff.

They're lunch ladies, okay?

Dad, can't you see

that this isn't gonna work?

Carter, it's gonna work, okay?

We just have to give it a little time.

It'll work.

It's gonna be a scorcher again today...

-Hey, Ernie.

-Hi, Carter.

-Hello.

-Oh, great.

Good morning, Carter.

What are you doing?

Chores.

-Chores? I do not understand.

-No, of course not.

Perhaps I could learn this "chores."

You could teach me.

You know, that's the best idea

you've had.

What must I do?

We'll start you off easy. Inventory.

-lnventory?

-Counting.

You count what's in here,

and put it in here. Have fun.

Oh! And when you're done,

there's a whole other shelf, too.

One.

-Everything okay?

-Yeah. Just peachy.

-You got the bow?

-Uh-huh.

Stay above that line.

-What line?

-Right there.

Okay.

Carter, what's Rosie doing

in the bait shop?

Chores.

Dad.

Rosie!

-Are you okay?

-I'm all right.

I think I need to bathe.

Carter, why don't you go on

in and clean this up, okay?

-Why me? She's the one who did it.

-Come on, pal. I'll help you.

-All right, it... It's not funny.

-Yes. Come on.

-You know it's a little funny.

-All right. Here. Go.

-You wanna laugh, too.

-No, I don't wanna laugh.

-Yes, you do.

-This is serious. Come on.

-What do you want for dinner tonight?

-Pizza.

Pizza? We had pizza last night.

How about... How about burgers?

How about this? Pizza and burgers.

-Pizza and burgers.

-Yeah. I wanna do both.

-One as an appetizer, or just together?

-I don't know.

I didn't know we still had all that stuff.

-What's all this?

-A proper dinner.

To thank you for helping me

clean up the mess

that I made in your shop of bugs.

-It's bait.

-I'm aware.

Okay.

-Here. Let me.

-No, no.

Thank you, but tonight, I serve you.

Well, I'm not gonna say no to that.

It is for you.

-For me?

-Mmm-hmm.

To wear. Okay. Fine.

Come on, Carter.

So, you cook?

I thought you had servants for that.

Actually, my mother grew up a peasant.

So she taught me many family recipes.

Wow!

Yeah, that sounds kind of fancy.

-Why don't we just order pizza?

-No, it's chicken and rice.

Fantastic. Bring it on, Rosie.

You know, I haven't had

a real home-cooked meal since...

Forever.

Right.

Let's dig in!

-How do you like it?

-That...

That is really, really good.

Gee, I had no idea you can cook.

-Thank you.

-This is terrific. You're wonderful.

Thank you. Would you like a roll?

-You made rolls, too?

-Yes.

-I had no idea.

-Yes.

Wow!

Must be nice to play peasant for a day.

Would you excuse me?

You do not know me, Carter.

What's the big deal?

You'll be back with your servants

and your personal chef

and private tutors soon enough.

How much did your father

tell you about me?

Other than the obvious,

I think we're on a need-to-know basis.

I think you need to know that my name

is Rosalinda Marie Montoya Fiore,

-and I am a royal princess.

-No kidding.

I am from a small island nation

called Costa Luna.

-Never heard of it.

-lt is not on most maps.

It is very small,

very unimportant to large countries,

but very important to me.

When my father died,

he left Costa Luna to me.

You don't have to tell me...

One month before my coronation,

our palace was attacked.

Your father was very brave.

He risked his life for you, I know.

That's his job. He rescues

poor, oppressed princesses.

Did he tell you we had

to leave my mother behind?

The man who invaded Costa Luna

now holds her as a hostage.

I didn't know.

They told me

my becoming Rosie Gonzalez

was the only way to keep her safe.

Stop. It's okay.

Carter, whatever I did to make

you dislike me, I am truly sorry.

I will try to blend in.

I will try to be from lowa.

It is the only way

to save my mother's life.

Let's just start over.

I would like that.

But you need to lighten up

on this princess stuff.

It's really annoying.

Absolutely. Please, I only want

to be this typical American teenager.

You know what?

I think we can arrange that.

I love this place! What is it?

It's a bowling alley. That's bowling.

Just do what I do and don't draw

any attention to yourself, please.

Right.

-Thank you.

-Sure.

-Carter! How you doing?

-Hi, Ed.

-Hi. How you doing, Rosie?

-I'm well, thank you.

-What'll it be?

-Bowling, please.

No kidding.

Five-and-a-half coming up.

-Thank you.

-Sure.

-What size?

-Excuse me?

Your feet. What size?

I do not know.

All of my shoes are made for me.

There's a shock.

Just get her some shoes.

Okay.

Your Highness.

Why, thank you, Edward.

-It's Edwin, actually.

-Edwin. That is a wonderful name.

Thank you. It's been

a pleasure serving you, milady.

All right. Thank you, Romeo.

Okay.

You're not blending in. Pick a ball.

Did you see that?

-Yeah. Nobody ever does that for us.

-They do now.

-Your shoe's untied.

-Don't trip.

Oh!

Careful there.

Donny, you don't have

to carry that for her.

She can do it herself

like a normal person.

-So I'll just take this.

-Whatever you say...

-Carter.

-Right.

-So, Donny is your boyfriend?

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