Queerama Page #6

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If you're 16, 17, 18, 19 or 20, and gay,

then you're not here.

Well, I'm here, and we're here,

and we will not be quiet

until we get equality!

What my honourable friend is seeking to do

is to get this house to vote

to legalise the buggery

of adolescent males.

Does she really think that's what

our constituents sent us here to do?

J" What you got is a black belt in BS

J" But you can't hawk

Your pretty wares up in here any more

J" Hit your head

On the playground at recess

J" Etch-a-sketch your way

Out of this one, reject! J"

(Woman) How can we advise young

gay men about the dangers of AIDS

when what they're doing

is supposed to be

strictly against the law?

Heterosexual activity is normal.

And homosexual activity,

putting your penis

into another man's arsehole,

is a perversion.

(Speaker) Order! Order!

We can well do without talk like that!

(Laughter)

The Ayes to the right were 280.

The Noes to the left 307.

So the Noes have it...

16... It's not 16. 16 has lost.

How do you know?

They've just had the vote.

16 has not happened.

They're going to now vote on 18.

We've lost 16!

(Loud booing)

- How much have we lost by?

- 27 votes.

Bastards!

(Loud booing and chanting)

People who don't know anything

about our lives or about being gay

are telling us how to live

and who we have the right to sleep with.

And we're just really fed up with it.

We've been waiting for change

and still, it's thrown back in our face.

We're still not treated as equals,

still being devalued.

Everybody is furious

and it's not surprising, is it, really?

(Crowd) 16 now! 16 now!

If everybody was a lesbian

and if everybody was homosexual,

the world would collapse.

The human race would die out

in a matter of a few generations.

One of the definitions

of a living organism

is that it should reproduce itself.

If everybody were homosexual,

this planet would be dead.

I think people are really worried

about homosexuality in general.

I think a lot of people

are really scared of it as well.

They don't really understand it

and it almost horrifies them.

The thought of a couple

walking down the street,

of the same sex, holding hands.

And I think they'd rather

walk away from it, avoid it

and not talk about it

than really look at it openly

and try to find out what it's about.

I know a lot of people who are bothered

by the fact that homosexuals, in general,

do try to press their views

on other people.

And through programmes like this,

they are almost forcing

their ways upon the majority.

Anyone wanting more information

from organisations dealing with lesbians

should send us

a stamped addressed envelope

for our fact-sheet.

J" It is difficult for you

To be so beautiful?

J" Or do you find the advantages

Tend to outweigh the disadvantages?

J" Am I being rude?

J" I'm sorry

J" I've never really had

The appropriate attitude

J" Punk's not dead!

J" Do you think that life is easier

When one looks as good as you do?

J" Or do people always say

That you're a narcissist?

J" Do they ingratiate themselves to you

And act all obsequious?

J" Come on now baby

You can tell me

J" It's just between the two of us

J" Snug slacks, baby

Snug slacks

J" Now you're giving me

A different kind of panic attack

J" Sick joke, baby

Crack smoke

J" Now take me out in your pick-up

For a midnight poke

J" I said Stonehenge, baby

Drug binge

J" Now you got me all damp

Down in my underpants

J" Snug slacks, baby

Snug slacks

J" Now let's get you out of those

S' And see what kind oi punch

'(our manhood packs I'

That's quite nice...

Just a minute,

those girls there are taking the mickey.

Want me to give them some verbal?

You did the last two!

Let me do these.

'Ere, you ain't taking the piss out of us,

are ya?

Don't look like that.

I'll tell you, darlin'.

I get paid for making people laugh

and I object to you two

having it for nothing, alright?

Right, where were we?

Ta! That's it...

Yeah, I like that. It looks good.

How do you think

homosexuals reveal themselves

when they're talking

about ordinary topics?

Perhaps in the assumptions

they make about their future

which are going to be different

from heterosexual futures.

I make a deliberate effort

in my conversation, sometimes,

to imply that marriage is in my future.

But talking at ease,

I might give away the fact that

in practice, I know it's not

going to be any part of my future.

Is a relationship like this

a sort of imitation marriage

or is it something quite different?

(Woman) It's not in fact

an imitation marriage.

It is a real marriage in the sense that

it is a union between two people.

It can't in fact be precisely the same

as a heterosexual marriage.

There are no children, as you say.

But in any other sense, it is in fact

a marriage between two people

and it is a permanent association

of two people.

When there is no opprobrium,

when there is no humiliation

heaped on homosexuals from outside,

they will cease

to have to confirm or deny.

Unfortunately, of course,

toleration has come in a form

that is slightly insulting.

That is to say, one imagined

the message when it came would read:

"Forgive us for having

for so long allowed our prejudices

"to blind us to your true worth,

"and cross our unworthy threshold

with your broad-minded feet".

Instead the message now reads:

"Oh, come in.

The place is a mess. You'll love it!"

Will you marry me?

J" Boy, you knock me on my ass so hard

J" How could I know that

you was holding that ace card?

J" When I saw you my jaw hit the floor

J" Now I don't want them other boys no more

J" You sent a laser beam of love to my soul

J" You made me shake so hard I lose control

J" My sweet director

Won't you give me the part?

J" 'Cause you're the one

Who jump started my heart

J" 'Cause you're my

Supernatural defibrillator

J" You are my heavenly re-animator

J" You are my super sexy stimulator

J" You are my loneliness exterminator

J" Come on baby 'fore I come unglued

J" Don't make me wait, boy

That would be so rude

J" You got me where I always wanted to be

J" Right in front of you

And down on my knees

J" I feel like someone punched me

Right in my head

J" I need to lay down, baby

Take me to bed

J" You leave me gob-smacked,

Dumbfounded...

J" Bound and struck, stunned and shot

Fuddled, discombobulated

J" 'Cause you're my

Supernatural defibrillator

J" You are my heavenly re-animator

J" You are my super sexy stimulator

J" You are my loneliness exterminator

J" You are my supernatural defibrillator

J" You are my heavenly re-animator

J" You are my super sexy stimulator J"

I will not accept a pardon.

To accept a pardon means

you accept that you were guilty.

I was not guilty of anything.

J" Not guilty of anything...

Not guilty of anything...

J" 'Cause you're my

Supernatural defibrillator

J" You are my heavenly re-animator

J" You are my super sexy stimulator

J" You are my loneliness exterminator

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