Red-Headed Woman Page #4

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Come on, Boris, darling.

Hello, Lil. I seen Al last night.

Mrs. Legendre to you, you half-wit.

There's a dame.

Strictly on the level, like a flight of stairs.

-Hello, everybody.

-You're only a half-hour late.

Sorry, but I've been

terribly busy this morning.

Oh, Boris, you stay right here, dear.

-You dropped your fur.

-Oh, it's only a silver fox.

Couldn't you got a gold one?

Yeah, well, I might have this one plated.

Well, let's make it snappy.

I got a few other customers today.

Oh, Sally, I'm worn out.

What do you want,

Trader Horn, a shave or a haircut?

Oh, don't try to get fresh.

Well, I hope this is

the last new house I have to furnish.

-It's an awful bore, isn't it?

-Awful.

But you know,

it really is going to be charming.

Charming? Say, you're getting

to talk like a pansy.

All right, it's gonna be swell.

Wait till you see it.

Don't tell me I'm gonna see it.

The next time I need a manicure,

bring your things over and do it there.

-Oh, thanks. That'll be lovely.

-Say, lay off, will you?

I'm so sorry.

You got all the furniture you need?

Well, I still have a few

Louis Quinze tables to get...

...and a couple of Jacobean bedsteads

and an English highboy...

-A what?

-A highboy.

Say, I thought you were gonna be

on the level now that you're married.

Oh, Sally. A highboy's an antique bureau.

Oh, my error.

-Irene's gonna do her house modernistic.

-She is?

Oh, well, I've got modernistic touches

just strewn all over my place.

-Say, when did you see her?

-Oh, she comes in for facials.

-So her skin's bad, eh?

-I should say not. She never looked better.

Oh, yeah?

You made a big mistake when

you moved across the street from her.

Well, I wanted the biggest house

in town and that's it.

Bill's bound to be

bumping into her all the time.

I'm not afraid of

that washed-out housewife.

Oh, that must be the big shot

they're expecting from New York.

That must be him

sitting between Bill and Daddy Legendre.

Daddy Leg"

-Welcome to Renwood, Mr. Gaerste.

-How do you do, Mr. Hall.

-Hold it, Mr. Gaerste.

-Just a minute, boys. Just a minute.

Now then.

Hooray for Mr. Gaerste.

Hooray!

Thank you very much, Mr. Gaerste.

Not at all, boys, not at all.

And to think that old bird

owns half the coal in America.

Well, we happen to own

a little of it ourselves.

Gaerste could buy out old man Legendre

with his postage stamps.

Is that so.

That shows you know a lot about it.

Now, Bill, I'd like you and Willie

to come into the hotel for a minute.

Goodbye, Gaerste, old pal.

I'll meet you in the coal bin.

Come in here. Do you want

the whole town to hear you?

Oh, all right, countess.

What are you wearing

to the banquet for Gaerste?

Oh, I'm not going.

Bill has to go alone. It's a stag affair.

Say, for a great big swell society-leader...

...you know less about what's going on.

What are you getting at?

Of course the women

have been invited to the banquet.

-Why, lrene's going.

-Where did you hear that?

Well, I'll be a--

What does that make out of you, baby?

A social onion.

Say, will you lay off.

What are you

gonna do about that banquet?

Well, if you think

Bill's going without me, you're crazy.

It isn't that banquet. It's every banquet.

Every party and affair

that's given in this town.

I'm left out of everything.

Everything.

I've told you a thousand times

I think it's a shame. What can I do?

You haven't introduced me

to your friends, not one of them.

I can't pick them up

and drag them in here.

Even your own family,

they never invite me anywhere.

Every chance they get, they flaunt Irene.

They don't flaunt her.

-Besides, they've known her all her life.

-Why don't they try and know me?

Maybe they'd like me. How can they tell

when they never give me a break?

-I'm not gonna hash this thing all over again.

-Who do they think they are, anyway?

I'll answer it.

Hello. Oh, hello.

Yes, he is, Mr. Legendre.

Just a moment.

It's your father for you.

-Hello, Dad.

-Oh, hello. Hello, son.

Listen, I'm at the hotel now.

I've just seen Gaerste, and he seems upset

you're not coming to the banquet tonight.

Well, I'm sorry, Dad,

but I didn't feel that I could go.

Oh, I realize he should've invited Lillian...

...but you know how conservative he is.

And he's such a great friend of lrene's.

I wish you'd get dressed and

run over here for a little while, at least.

Well, I don't think I can.

No, I can't, Dad. And that's final.

Sorry.

The idea of him asking you

to come without me.

Dad didn't mean anything, darling.

He was just worried...

...because Mr. Gaerste is our most

important business connection. That's all.

We have to eat, you know.

Come on, darling. Let's make up.

Bill...

...do you really wanna make up, huh?

Oh, you know I do, darling.

All right, then. Promise you'll

fix it for me to meet Mr. Gaerste.

-Well, what for?

-Well, I wanna ask him to dinner.

-He wouldn't come, darling.

-He might.

If he did, I could invite

the whole town to the party.

And they wouldn't dare turn me down.

He won't even meet you.

-What do you mean he won't meet me?

-Well, I asked him and he refused.

-He did?

-I'm sorry, darling.

All right, arrange for me to bump into

him in your office as if it were an accident.

-That won't get you anything, either.

-Is that so?

I suppose I'm just a cross-eyed,

half-witted, hunchback cripple?

-You'd get over better if you were.

-What do you mean?

Darling, he's a narrow-minded,

straight-laced old dodo.

Yeah, well, he's a man, isn't he?

Now, Mr. Gaerste,

you mustn't take this too seriously.

But you should have told me

you were Willie Legendre's wife.

But you wouldn't meet

Bill Legendre's wife.

She was an awful woman.

Just a minute.

Hello.

What? They're here?

All right, tell them to come up.

-Who was it?

-Dinner guests, coming up for cocktails.

You have to go out this way.

Come along, my child.

-Yes, but--

-Come along now. Come along.

That door over there.

Charlie.

You're gonna do something for me.

Am I? What is it?

Well, you're going to ask your guests to

come to a party at my house in your honor.

No, no, my child. I can't do that.

No, no, not after... No.

Oh, yes, you can.

I'll be listening at that door.

If you don't invite them

within five minutes after they arrive...

...I'll walk in and make a scene

that Shakespeare couldn't top.

Now, run along like a good boy, Charlie.

You can't keep your little friends waiting.

-Good evening.

-Glad to see you.

-See? We all arrived at the same time.

-Yes.

-Glad to see you.

-How are you?

-Very well.

-Hello, C.B.

Glad to see you.

-Well, C.B., here we are.

-Glad to see you, Will.

You'll all have to pardon my appearance,

I'm afraid.

I'm just an overworked businessman

with no time to change.

Where were you this afternoon, C.B.?

-I thought we had a golf date.

-Oh, well...

-I wasn't feeling very well.

-That's too bad.

As a matter of fact, I never left the hotel.

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