Remember Me

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I know, but it's coming.

When is it?

lt's not gonna be too much longer.

Spit your gum out. Come on. Thank you.

Oh, here comes the train!

Get behind me. Ally, stay behind me.

Just take it. Take it.

Give me your purse. Give me your purse.

-Give me the ring!

-What?

-Don't talk.

-lt's gonna be okay.

-Ally, don't look at them. No, no...

-Better not, lady.

This is the Coney lsland-bound F train.

Next stop Avenue I.

No!

Mom! Mom!

Mom! Mom! Mom!

Mom! Mom!

Mom!

Daddy!

Hello?

Fifteen minutes.

-How are you, Mom?

-You look good.

-How you doing, Les?

-Good to see you.

Thanks for the wake-up call, Maestro.

You smell like Listerine and beer.

You couldn't wear a tie?

l could have.

This is nice. Michael would like

that we still do this.

Did you tell Tyler what your art teacher said

about your portrait?

Mom!

Tell him!

She said l captured the moment

like a young James Whistler.

Well, at least

it's a young James Whistler,

because, God, l mean, Whistler,

he fell off in the latter half of his career.

He is the Boyz ll Men

of European art history.

She recommended your sister

to Steinhardt's Summer Art lntensive,

-and that's hugely prestigious.

-lt's fantastic.

lt's great.

l'm going to do a drawing called

"My Brother and His Favorite Cigarette."

And, since l'd be the youngest person ever,

practically, to be studying there...

Tyler,

would you please pass the sugar?

She still has a couple of minutes left

on the clock, Dad.

Just a couple of seconds.

Caroline's perfectly capable of speaking up

if she's feeling slighted in any way.

Have l slighted you in any way, Caroline?

l'm fine.

-l didn't mean to change the subject.

-What was the subject?

Excuse me?

The subject we were discussing.

What was it?

Now is not the time for your heroics, Tyler.

Actually, now is the perfect time.

-All right. l gotta go.

-Tyler.

Caroline, do you want me

to take you anywhere?

-l'm okay. l'll stay with Mom.

-All right. l'll see you soon.

The sugar.

Eat something.

Gandhi said that

whatever you do in Iife wiII be insignificant,

but it's very important that you do it.

I tend to agree with the first part.

MichaeI, you know what day I'm staring at.

By 22, Gandhi had three kids,

Mozart, 30 symphonies,

and Buddy HoIIy was dead.

You once told me,

"Our fingerprints don't fade

from the lives we touch."

Is that true for everybody?

Or was that just poetic bullshit?

l sold your girlfriend a toothbrush.

-You sold my who? What?

-You know, your girlfriend.

That voluptuous,

delightfully oblivious little blonde

you left in your bed yesterday?

-Yeah.

-Yeah, l sold her a toothbrush.

l got three bucks.

-Congratulations.

-Yeah, are in order.

'Cause that sale inspired

our newest business venture.

The S.L.U.T.

lt's a Single Lady's Universal Tote.

lt's a one-night-stand travel pack

for women. You know?

We throw in makeup and toiletries,

a cell phone charger, cab numbers...

We retail it for $1 9.95.

Maybe we'd do an infomercial.

Do you think women will buy this

with actual money?

Okay. Yeah.

You know what? Fine. Be cynical.

But think about it, at one point in history,

two people had a conversation,

a lot like this one, about the light bulb.

One went on to fame and fortune,

the other probably went to work

at Mickey D's or something.

ln the wake of recent terrorist attacks,

do you guys think there's a place

for a discussion about ethics

when we're talking about

the root causes of terrorism?

Wasn't it a moral question,

not an ethical one?

-How so?

-Well, morals define personal character.

And ethics?

The standards of behavior expected

by a group.

And in the end,

personal character is more important?

-Absolutely.

-That's a good point.

Does knowledge of the past

limit us or benefit us?

Can we make this

a non-smoking statue?

Yeah, Tyler.

Can we make this a non-smoking statue?

-You promised you'd quit.

-l know.

Why do you think Dad

doesn't wanna listen to me?

-Dad loves you.

-So?

You can love someone

and not want to spend time with them.

-Yeah, you got that right.

-Mom loves Aunt Sara.

But at Christmas last year,

she wouldn't let Les leave them

in a room together

'cause she said that there'd be

a "Yuletide homicide."

That's 'cause Aunt Sara drinks.

You don't drink, do you?

l'm 11 .

So why would anyone ever want

to avoid you?

Michael used to drink.

That's 'cause Michael was 21 .

When you're 21 , drinking's new

and exciting, and everybody does it.

Aunt Sara drinks

'cause she wishes she was 21 .

You're 21 .

Okay.

Hey, what about Atlantic City

for your birthday this year, man?

-Really?

-Yeah. We'll get a suite.

You could call Toothbrush Girl.

l think l'd rather be sodomized

with a toothbrush than that.

lt's your day, man.

We can work something out.

The schematic for these particular shelves

is of authors who have slept together

and ended up dead or in prison.

No sh*t?

Sh*t.

See, that's why chicks dig you, man.

No, seriously.

They love this freaky poetic crap.

Oh! l ran into Megan yesterday.

She's bartending at Don Hill's tonight, man.

Wants us to stop by.

She practically begged me.

Yeah, poor thing.

Hey!

-Hey!

-"Hey," nothing, man! What's...

What?

All right, look, you've been a ghost

the past couple of weeks, all right?

You never wanna go out anymore.

l've had enough

of this brooding introvert sh*t, okay?

l'm ready to set up an intervention here.

What?

You do realize that interventions

typically don't involve binge drinking.

Look, one drink.

-Okay? Just one.

-When was the last time you had one drink?

Communion.

Megan! Megan. Wow! You look great!

Do not speak.

Okay. Two beers?

ls she mad at me or something?

She's not mad. That's how people act

when they're really into you.

-Yeah.

-Excuse me?

Oh!

-Hello. Excuse me. Hi.

-Could you get a picture for us?

Yeah, sure. l just push the button?

-Turn it...

-You gotta go the other way.

Beautiful.

Save that for your collection.

So, what are you girls drinking?

-Mojitos!

-Mojitos!

No, no, no, l'm not saying

there's anything wrong with any other city.

l'm just saying that this

is the greatest city in the world.

All right? l love this street!

l love this street! Where are you guys from?

-Miami.

-Miami.

That was great. You did it in unison.

Miami. That's a big suck fest.

No, this is the greatest city.

l don't know, like Barcelona, Rio,

-they got nothing on this town.

-What are we doing? l'm freezing.

-Hotel bar.

-Michael!

Yeah.

-Should have worn a coat.

-Michael!

-lt's warm in here.

-Get your hands off my car!

What's your problem, a**hole?

-you'd be warmer if you snuggle up.

-A**hole!

What the hell?

-Get back in your car.

-Yeah?

-What?

-Go back to Long lsland

-where you come from.

-l'm from Queens, a**hole!

Shut the hell up, Yank.

Why don't you go back

to England, huh?

Hey, you wanna go back

to my hotel room?

-That's my bloody guitar!

-Eat sh*t and die!

Whoa!

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