Return to Paradise

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iThey were my two best friends

in the whole world. For five weeks./i

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iIt was a total accident we even met./i

3

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iMe, a bum from Brooklyn

using phoney frequent-flyer miles./i

4

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iTony Croft was kind of a golden boy

from Harvard School of Architecture./i

5

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iWe met Lewis McBride, this long-haired

Greenpeace tree-hugger guy./i

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iSo the plan was to party

till we ran out of cash in Malaysia./i

7

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iIt was a paradise of rum, girls,

and good, cheap hash./i

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Whoo!

9

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Whoo!

10

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I don't understand

a word you're saying to me.

11

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But this is my least favourite part

anyway, the talking stuff.

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- Do you know what I mean?

- Hm.

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You do?

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Good morning, bro'. What's up?

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Did you sleep good, you little dreamer?

16

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What did you do that for?

17

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It's my last day, Lew.

Get up. We'll go do some stuff.

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- Maybe it shouldn't be your last day.

- Maybe it shouldn't.

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Maybe you should get a haircut.

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- Wow!

- You're up early.

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- What kind of party's this?

- My party.

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Your party?

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Oh, yeah. It's your aggressive

instincts. I can hear them.

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- Where you boys from? America?

- Malaysian for, "Do you have money?"

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- Yes, we're from the States.

- You have fun here?

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Uh, it could be better.

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Listen, I got something special for you.

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- Yeah? What?

- I got special animal potion.

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- You want?

- Animal potion?

30

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Number one aphrodisiac. Keep you

hard as a rock all night. You want?

31

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It sounds painful.

Thanks. It's all right.

32

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- Yeah, I want to see this.

- You want to see.

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- Your friend? You want to see?

- Sure. Yeah.

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- OK. Follow me.

- I'll tell you what this is about.

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Yeah. All right, this is good.

This is all good.

36

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Lewis, this doesn't look like

the number one pharmacy to me.

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Hey, yo! Brother, yo!

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- Special delivery for you.

- Oh, this is good.

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Good stuff. Original. Good. Very good.

40

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- This is rhino horn, isn't it?

- Ah, smart man.

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Rhino horn good.

American, Japanese like it.

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- What are you doing? Come on.

- You take it. Listen, listen.

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Woman like it.

Keep you hard. Keep you hard. Good.

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Even if this worked... You listen to me.

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If this worked, which it doesn't,

you're murdering an endangered species.

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- They're not gonna get that.

- Yo, yo!

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- I know you're trying to make a buck...

- Ten bucks! Ten bucks!

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It doesn't have to get f***in' violent.

I'm talking to you.

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- You listen!

- Whoa, whoa, whoa!

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Hey, man! F***!

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What the f*** is up, man?

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Get the f*** out of here.

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- F*** you, you little f***er!

- Easy. Easy. OK. OK.

54

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Yihoo!

55

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Stop moving the bike.

You've got to balance it.

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Ha-hah!

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- Slow it down!

- This is a really steep hill.

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Brake!

59

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Are you all right, man?

Are you all right?

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Are you OK?

61

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Oh, my God. Holy sh*t, bro'.

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Thanks for the help, guys.

63

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Are you gonna push that back

to Penang?

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- Let the bike go, brother.

- I'm not gonna leave it.

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Lewis, the deposit we put down

on that bike is five times its worth.

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Why are you pushing the f***ing bike?

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I'm not gonna leave it.

This is his bread and butter.

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- You're out of your mind.

- Maybe if you helped me out.

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- We'd go so much quicker.

- Here, I'll push it.

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I'll push the f***ing thing. Here.

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Thank you.

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- You know what?

- Oh!

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Nice shot, Sheriff. Really.

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- Oh, that's great.

- Let's get home. Come on.

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Friends for life, man.

76

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- You guys gotta give me your addresses.

- Yeah, give me yours.

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When I get mine, I'll give you

my address, down there in Borneo.

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- Where?

- Borneo.

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You got a girlfriend there, man?

80

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No. I got the

Orang-utan Reintroduction Project.

81

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- The what project?

- This group rescues orang-utans

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that have been kept as pets,

and integrates them back in the wild.

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I'm gonna go down and volunteer.

84

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Bro', if the apes need humans

to save them, then they're f***ed.

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Pay no attention to him.

He's always dumping on somebody.

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- That's cool.

- What about you, golden boy?

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You can't wait to put all those things

you call buildings up in New York.

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Skyscrapers. No, man, they'll be

beautiful. Touching the clouds.

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You guys don't realise how good

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