Road to Bali Page #2

It's the tarplan of my father's clan.

Highness your cousin, Prince

Kenarock is here.

I will see him alone. You girls may

leave.

Hey, things are picking up.

- Taste the local architecture.

- Built like brick begodas.

- Welcome to Batu.

- They look like Americans.

- They look like Kenarock boys.

- They're not bad.

Do you think they are sailors?

- They've been expecting us. They must have

got our wires. - Well, we got to ration

ourselves down here you know.

- Let's forget the box and just head for the

high country. - I don't know which way

to turn, everything looks so good.

Well don't get tied down. This may

just be the older stuff you know.

- Oh no!

- What's that?

Eroll Flynn, he can't stand it.

Make yourselves available, huh kids?

Stand by, you'll hear from our local branch.

I'll sell you my suit size and everything with it.

Isn't it nice to know that we still have it.

- We got that old magic.

- That sea air must have recharged

our batteries.

- I feel like I've had a complete overhaul.

- Yeah, and if we can get our

speedometers turned back, we're in business.

Don't look now , but Abu and his

brother are still with us.

Don't worry about them. Let them

get their own girls.

I wonder if they massage?

Too bad my prayers were not

answered.

- Prayers? For me?

- Yes!

That you be washed overboard.

Despite your prayers, I managed to

obtain some excellent diving equipment....

... and two american divers. I think

our plan....

Our plan? I want no part of it.

Your two americans will die like all

the others.

It's just cold-blooded murder.

-How about those chicks huh?

- Steady, steady now. Remember Austrailia.

All that trouble.

Yes, we're not going to get involved

with girls again. Remember?

- Well.......

- Well.......

Well.......

Your turn.

Your Highness, may I present our

guests.

Your Highness!

Gentlemen, you are in the presence

of my cousin, Princess Lala.

Well the name is Bridley, Princess.

Harold Bridley.

Sportsman, racketure, polo player

and all-around good egg.

Welcome to Batu gentlemen.

George Cockran at your service

Your Highness.

- Continental?

- Oh go run and play with the

peasants. I'll take care of Your Royal Highness.

- Do you always fight over girls?

- Well what else is there to fight over?

We've never had any money.

That's for Washington.

Now let's be fair, be fair Leroy. If

you can't pay, you do time.

Follow me gentlemen.

We're coming.

They have become friendly.

- That is a bad omen.

- Omens are for old women.

Sharks will soon be picking their

bones.

This kid carries her own antenna.

- Man, this is quite a quonset.

- Amazing what you can do with a G-I loan.

They must have gambling here.

She was my mother. Queen

Tomma of Batu.

- Beautiful.

-And he was my father.

Didn't anybody in the family wear

the pants?

Colorful old chap, wasn't he? He

must have gotten around some.

Father sailed a merchant ship that

docked here. He liked the island,

met mother and remained.

- I'd like to remain her myself.

- You're reading my mind.

- You're the one that always wants

to go home. - I'm home!

-Something wrong Princess?

You must be very tired after your

voyage. You must rest before.....

- Before what?

- Before tonight. I'm having a feast in your honor.

- Run out to the car and get my

finger bowl, huh?

- Will you need your chopsticks?

- Just my fork and a pusher.

- I may join you.....l think you'll...

Hey, not bad without a reservation huh?

- Rest well. I will see you tonight.

- Leave a call or we'll call you later.

Here! Here!

Don't over match yourself old man.

- We may get a little rain later.

- Oh bug that.

-Gee, what a spot this is.

- Isn't this lush.

Would you like me to shoot you a

squirrel before your nap sir?

- Lou wouldn't do that Daniel Boone.

- I might knock off a rodent.

This'll do for me George, this will do it.

-Good night all.

- Hey, get your shoes off. You're in

a palace.

I've always wanted to play at a

palace.

Draw the blinds pal. It's siesta time

for Sophie.

Very well sir.

- Man, I could spend the rest of my

life in a joint like this.

- You say that everytime you get in a bed.

I'm in a haze. That Lala intoxicates me.

- Could be. She's half scotch.

- Yeah, and me for a chaser.

Just don't get another hangover.

Freedom.

I'd better get some black polish.

This may be formal tonight.

Say Hagas? What is it McBagas? Have you

heard the latest about McTavish? What's he

done now? He's living on the roof.

- Why would he be living on the roof?

- He heard someone say the "drinks

were on the house".

The drinks are on the house. You

know what we......

Thanks. You're a pal. Not mine,

but you're a pal.

- Sit here. Are you kidding.

-He takes that large economy size.

Next week it's my turn to wear the girdle.

- Why don't you entertain us a little.

Why don't you do your disappearing act.

Oh, I know that one. You mean the

hindu rope trick.

I'm sure you've heard of it. As a

matter of fact, it's impossible.

This must be the one, where they

throw the rope up in the air, climb

up and disappear.

- It's nothing. It's sort of a mass hypnosis.

- Where did you learn words like that?

This kid was drummed out of

kindergarten for cheating on fingerpainting.

- I was framed.

- Now watch!

What else it new?

Watch it governor, I think this calls

for me.

Here, here. I'll be in the balcony.

I've heard about vanishing

cream...but vanishing blubber.

Fight him off Princess. Here comes

Jack of the Beanstalk.

Down boy, down boy.

How's the beast in the penthouse?

- Ah, space cadet returns.

- Did you get my card Jacques?

I had a wonderful time, I'm glad you

were here.

-Very funny. It's easy for you to get up there.

- Oh come on.....it's mass hypnosis.

Mass hypnosis, you're full of

helium. Say how about a little black

magic for me Princess?

Here's an exciting bit of hokus pokus.

- If a cobra comes out of there, it's yours.

- I'll split it with you.

Pay your dues.

- I wouldn't believe it if I saw it.

- I saw it and I wouldn't believe it.

I'm starting to believe it.

In scout camp they had basket

weaving and I took up wood-working.

Give me the pipe. I'm going into

business for myself.

I'll check with you in a fortnight.

- He's always eager to improve himself...

...always trying to pick up something new.

What about you and I seeking out some

dale where you and I can discuss.....

- George, I must talk to you and Harold.

- Oh forget about Harold. He's a

hustler, a philanderer.

Let me tell you something. He ran

out on a very lovely girl down in

Austrailia. And on their wedding day too.

- I think he's attractive.

- I can't hear you. Not reaching me at all.

- I think you're attractive too.

- Contact.

Actually, as a matter of fact, there's nothing special

about me. I'm just an average, all-around american

boy with an excess of charm.

- Harold told me that too.

-About me? About him. So

conceited that man.

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