Roadgames Page #2

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- A dingo's a kind of dog,

so what's the difference?

- A dog is a parasite hybrid.

I mean, he chases cars,

he barks at shadows,

and he eats his own faeces.

But a dingo, dingo's

clean, he's intelligent,

he's quiet.

Fact, he's physically

incapable of barking.

That's why they call

him the silent dog.

He's an aristocrat.

Like me.

- Are all truck drivers

as stuck up as you?

- Madam, just because I drive

a truck does not make me

a truck driver.

- Oh, you and your tundra

wolf sitting up here in your

ivory tower.

I bet you're not even

married, are you?

NO.

(engine rumbling)

- Why aren't you

going to pick her up?

- Lady, that hitch is getting

to Perth faster than we are.

- That's no reason to

call her a b*tch, is it?

- Oh, hitch.

- [Madeline] Language.

- Hitch, as in hitchhiker.

- Well, a gentleman

would have picked her up

with this maniac running

'round loose butchering girls.

- What maniac?

- The one on the

radio, on the news.

- Yeah, go on.

- I don't know, it's

just some maniac.

- Yeah? Well, what else

did they say about him?

Did they say what

kind of rig he drove?

- I didn't say he

was driving a rig.

- [Truck driver]

No, no, no, I mean--

- How did you know my

husband was an accountant?

- Just a guess.

- How far away is

this roadhouse?

- It's not far.

- Good.

(western music)

- [Radio] We have an accident

here, we're clearing the road.

Would you please pull over?

- Where are we going?

- Shortcut.

(engine rumbling)

Wait a minute, I've got it,

the hoochie coochie doll.

- It's mineral, not animal.

Oh, I don't know, I've guessed

about everything in the truck

- You never said it

had to be in the truck.

- Well, that's ridiculous.

It could be a thousand

things outside the truck.

- You're the one who

wanted to play games.

Give up?

- Yeah, guess so.

- It's ya boots.

' My boots?

- Leather is an animal product.

- Uh uh, my boots are

imitation leather.

They're vinyl, a

thermal plastic radical.

- La di da.

- Which makes them either

mineral or vegetable,

but they're

certainly not animal.

So, I win, right?

- But you gave up!

- Okay, okay, okay.

Hey, it's my turn.

- Okay-

- Animal.

- That fly there.

- Now, look, if you're not

gonna play the game properly

I don't wanna play at all.

- Well, it's not the fly?

- Yes, it is the fly, but

you're taking all the fun

out of it, you've gotta

ask the questions,

you gotta narrow it

down more logically.

- Okay, this time I've

got a real good one.

- No, I've had enough.

- Oh, come on, it's really easy,

and it's not even

animal product.

It's just plain,

ordinary animal.

- Okay, but no tricks.

- I'll give you a clue.

It's bigger than a bread box.

" Me?

NO.

- Boswell?

NO.

- Well, it's gotta be you.

- Wrong.

- Lady, if there is an

animal bigger than a breadbox

inside this truck, you

better tell me about it.

- I never said it

was inside the truck.

- The pigs?

NO.

' [Quid] Kangaroo?

NO.

- An emu?

- [Madeline] No.

- Well, the Nullarbor nymph?

Lawrence of A friggin' rabia,

I don't know, this is crazy.

- [Madeline] You give up?

- [Quid] Yeah, I guess so.

- [Madeline] It's

that man back there.

- I didn't see any

man back there.

Course you didn't,

you were too busy arguing

but there was a man back

there standing beside a dark

green van and he

was digging a hole.

(brakes screech)

- What the hell is he doing?

- I told you, digging a hole.

What's wrong?

(foreboding music)

What's wrong?

(shushing noise)

(foreboding music)

(engine rumbling)

(tyres screeching)

- What the hell was he burying?

- Is this another game?

- Why does a man stop in

the middle of nowhere,

and dig a hole?

- Maybe he had to, you

know, go to the toilet.

- Lady, you don't understand.

This same guy picked up

a hitchhiker last night,

and then about

4:
30 this morning

he watched the garbage

bags being collected

outside the motel,

and now he's burying

more garbage.

Doesn't that seem a

little weird to you, lady?

- You truck drivers

take drugs, don't you?

You've got the DDTs.

- Cast to the wind

thy ghastly sin.

- Pardon?

- That's it.

The ghastly sin is dissipated.

Erased from existence,

and another thing a body wouldn't

last half a day out here

with all the birds

and the insects.

- I don't know what

you're talking about.

- I'm talking about sex.

I am talking about sex.

Stolen from a young girl

in the back of a van

or a seedy motel.

I'm talking about guilt.

Terrible guilt.

Awful guilt.

A guilt so terrible that

it can only be obliterated

by spreading the evidence

all over the countryside.

Jesus.

- I think I'd like

to get out here.

- No, wait, wait a minute,

now don't be silly.

Now, listen, what exactly

did they say about this guy

on the news?

- I don't know what you

mean, I don't know anything.

- Hey, now come on, lady,

you're supposed to be

the authority on weirdos.

Now, come on, help me out.

It was something about

Jack the Ripper or...

- I don't know what

you're talking about!

- I'm just talking about

a hunch, that's all.

- I wanna get out!

- Wait, wait, wait,

first, I've got a game.

- I don't wanna play.

- It's animal.

No!

- It's bigger than a breadbox,

but it's small enough to fit

in a plastic rubbish bag.

- That is a sick game.

A human being is not an animal!

I know what you're thinking

and it wouldn't fit

in a rubbish bag!

- Oh, yes, it would if

you cut off the damn head!

- Stop it!

(sobbing)

Hey, lady!

Lady!

Lady, stop!

(terrifying orchestral music)

Now, lady, I am not gonna

hurt you, I promise.

Listen, you stopped me

on the road, remember?

I'm just a truck driver.

I know I talk a lot and I'm

given the flights of the

imagination, but there's

no need to be afraid of me.

Lady, please, lets just

go back to the truck, okay?

- We don't want trouble,

we never wanted trouble.

- Yeah, but who does?

- Then they threatened

my children.

Horrible phone calls late at

night, they killed our dog.

When the police came,

they said the strike

was Floyd's fault.

We've got our own problems,

mister, we don't need

anybody else's.

I didn't see any man

back there, understand?

- Yeah, I think I do.

No vans or lunch boxes or

anything to do with police

and no more games.

- Right.

No more games.

Hello, hello, I'm trying to

get in touch with the nearest

police station.

Right, right, hold on a second.

Hello, my name is Quid, and I'm

calling from the roadhouse

at Yellowdine.

Sorry, Yellow 'dyne'.

Right, listen, I may have

some information regarding

those murders that

you're investigating.

Yeah, no, no, no,

my name is Quid.

Quid!

Patrick Quid.

(twinkling music)

Q-U-I-D!

Quid!

As in pound note.

Right, I'm a truck driver.

A truckie, rig ht!

Listen, I may have some...

Hello?

Hello?

Sorry, sorry-

No, I was saying...

I'm trying to, but I think

we got a bad connection here.

And listen, I'd rather not

get into it over the phone

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