Rock-A-Doodle Page #2

I woulda whopped him if

I'da had my shoes tied.

But you know something, tying shoes

is harder than dry dog food.

- Whatcha wearing shoes for?

- Bunions.

I got a load of bunions,

and them shoes help my feet.

- Here, let me show you how to tie 'em.

(gasps)

Jeepers, I'm all furry!

- Well, kittens are furry.

- But, but, I'm a little boy.

(yowling scream)

(gulp)

Did that come outta me?

I'm, I'm a cat, he turned me into a cat!

Help me, do something!

I can't be a cat, I'm a boy!

Patou, what'll I do?

- Alright, steady boy, keep your pants on.

(gasps)

- Yuck!

What am I doing, I'm licking myself.

(sniffing)

- [Peepers] Patou!

- I'm in here.

- By my calculations, this

can't possibly be the city.

Let's see. 367 southeast...

Or is it 676?

(gasps)

(laughing)

- It's okay Peepers, it's Edmond.

He's a nice kitty.

- I'm a boy!

And I almost ate a mouse.

I must be crazy.

- You bet your sweet whiskers.

- Wow.

- Ain't no city around here.

- Oh, sadness.

- Hey, aren't you gonna tie my shoes?

- I can't, I can't help anybody.

I'm too little.

I'm a scrawny furball runt.

Mom and Dad won't even recognize me!

Mom, Dad, help!

(thunder)

Oh, Chanticleer.

- What?

- If he doesn't come back and crow soon,

it won't shine again and the

rain will keep coming down

and the water will get higher and higher

'til, 'til...

We all drown.

- Wowie wow wow wow wow!

Are we close, are we near the city?

Us magpies are just made for the city.

Come on already, hurry up, Peepers!

- We are not looking for the city.

We are looking for Chanticleer.

- Well he's in the city, isn't he?

- Then he is in the city.

- Girls, they think they know everything.

Why don't you run home, be

a mousewife, make cheese.

- Snipes, you think you're so superior.

- "Thuperior."

Nice lisp.

- My lisp isolates and elevates me,

and makes me a rare specimen.

- Ah, this is flippin' garbage!

(arguing)

- Pipe down, you two.

- The story's true!

You all laughed at him and he went away.

- You're right, son.

We done wrong, and that's why

we're searchin' for the city.

We gotta find Chanti and apologize.

- Then he'll forgive us...

- Come home...

- [Chicks] And raise the sun!

- Well, I know where the city is.

I've been there lots of times as a boy.

- A boy?

- Before that big owl

turned me into a cat!

- Owl?

(snorts) Owl?

- Edmond, would you take us to the city?

- I can't.

Look at me, I'm a cat.

No, a little kitty.

What can I do?

- I can do lots of things, and

I'm a lot smaller than you.

And furthermore, I could

forgive you for being a cat

if you would take us to the city.

Of course, if you're a fraidy-cat...

- I'm not afraid!

- Or like, a scaredy-cat...

- Me, scared?

- Hey, guys...

- Lay off the boy.

- Hey, hey guys...

- Okay, okay!

I'm not afraid of anything.

I'll take you to the city

and find Chanticleer.

(animals laughing)

And bring him home, and save

Dad and Mom and the farm.

- Alright, hope you can swim, guys.

- [Edmond] Oh no!

(coughing)

We don't have to swim,

we'll go by boat.

- Oh, this is serious.

- Peepers, you'll need

this if those owls return.

- Here!

- Owls?

- I'm sticking with you.

- Well fellas, this is it.

(gulps)

- [Snipes] The city!

The lights, the chicks, the food.

- Bye, good luck with the owls!

- Owls?

(whimpers)

(thunder)

- [Patou] Yep, owls.

While Edmond set our course

for the city in the USS Toybox,

the Duke and his owls

were back in their lair

stirrin' up some powerful nasty weather.

(low organ music)

- So he turns on the Duke, and with what

do you suppose he turns on the Duke?

- [All] What, Master?

- A flashlight!

What a horrible thing to do

What a horrible thing to do

Thing to doooo

- But then, when my back is turned,

what four-legged flea-bitten louse

comes sneaking through the window

and has the nerve to bite me on the leg?

Who, who, who, who, who?

- Who?

- Patou.

(gasps)

Yes!

Patou, Patou

- Destroy the farm,

destroy the cat, the dog,

or do you want the chicken back?

No, we hate the sun

The answer's noooo

It'll make my leg feel so much better

if that rooster never crows!

(laughs maniacally)

We hate the sun

That much we know

Rain!

We hate the rooster.

we'll never let it crow

Never let him crow!

We hate the sun

From head to toe

From head to toe!

We hate the rooster,

we'll never let it crow.

Never let it crow

Never let it crow.

(crashing)

Aaahhh!

- Uncle Dukey, Uncle Dukey.

(yells)

I wish you wouldn't do that.

- Hunch, I told you never to call me that.

- Yes, sir.

No sir, sir.

But guess what I just saw,

Patou the dog floating in

a toybox down the river,

and he has this cute little

white kitty with him--

(yells)

- Hunch, my little pygmy nephew.

Come to your uncle.

(jumbled organ notes)

- Ah!

- [Patou] Meanwhile, bound for the city,

Edmond steered us through the

perils of the flooded river.

- [Peepers] Starboard ho!

- [Snipes] Starboard who?

Left or right?

- [Edmond] Uh-oh.

Giant tree, a hundred feet and closing!

- Jumpin' Jehosaphat!

We need wind power!

- 40 feet!

- Well guys, I-I think

I'm slowing you down.

Yeah, I'll see you later, guys.

- 30 feet!

- Ahh!

- Come on, Patou, pull on this.

It worked!

- Turn now!

(screaming)

This is the right way, guys!

(humming "Ride of the Valkyries")

- Okay guys, you heard the Duke.

Total and complete, oh-ho, annihilation.

Bombs away!

- Aah!

Hey!

- Bombs away, bombs away!

- Edmond, grab ahold!

- Ooh ho ho, gotcha--

Oow!

- Get my camera!

- Huh?

What does he want with a camera?

- Get that camera.

- Ooh, I gotcha, kitty.

- Put me down!

(growling)

- Say cheese!

- Oooh!

- Ha ha, we got 'em.

- Uh-oh...

- Oh no!

- Get the lid.

- Ahah, adequate pipe.

- L-Let me outta here.

I can't breathe!

Help, I need air.

- What's wrong with him?

- He's claustrophobic.

Teeny-weeny tight spaces

make him very, very nervous.

- Uh-oh.

Uh-oh!

- Get him away from the lid.

- Help, we're trapped,

we're trapped like rats.

We're trapped, we're

trapped, we're trapped.

Trapped like rats...

- Come back here, you crazy bird.

Now settle down, you're rockin' the boat.

- I can't breathe...

- Don't make me lose my temper, Snipes.

- I need air, I don't wanna swim.

Mommy, we're trapped Mommy!

- Settle down.

- Patou!

- Oh, no.

- Aah!

(coughing)

That was close.

Mercy.

- Oh no!

- [Peepers] Abandon ship, abandon ship!

(screaming)

(coughing and spluttering)

- What's that smell?

- Garbage.

Ah, this is pathetic.

I risk my life and what do I get?

Garbage!

Why, I've never been so--

Wow!

- The city!

- Wow!

- It's so beautiful.

- Now, all we got to

do is find Chanticleer

and that's gonna be like hunting

for a needle in a haystack.

(yawning)

(clattering)

- Ow!

- Uncle Dukey, Uncle Dukey!

I got 'em.

- If I killed my nephew, would

that be murder or charity?

- I got 'em, I really got 'em!

No more kitty, sir.

Mission, oohoh, accomplished.

- And the dog?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes