Rounders Page #7

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- Know exactly when

to release a shitty hand.

- Come on, Mike, forget that.

This girl is obviously

wrapped way too tight for living.

No, she was a good... I knew it.

I f***in' knew it.

[Sighs]

It's depressing.

You can't trust 'em.

You can't trust 'em at all.

I mean, look at you.

You domesticated yourself for this girl.

You took yourself out of the life.

You walked the f***in' line for her.

And the minute you want a little

of it back, she walks out on you.

It's just like

the saying says, you know?

In the poker game of life,

women are the rake.

- They are the f***in' rake.

- What the f*** are you talking about? What saying?

- I don't know. There oughta be one.

You know what cheers me up

when I'm feelin' shitty?

- What?

- Rolled up aces over kings.

- That right?

- Yeah.

- Check raising stupid tourists

and taking huge pots off 'em.

- Yeah?

- Stacks and towers of checks I can't even see over.

Playin' all night, high-limit Hold' Em at the Taj.

Where the sand turns to gold.

- F*** it, let's go.

- Don't tease me.

- Let's play some f***in' cards.

[Mike Narrating]

The poker room at the Mirage in Vegas...

is the center of

the poker universe.

Doyle Brunson, Johnny Chan,

Phil Helmuth...

The legends consider it

their office.

Every couple of days

a new millionaire shows up...

wanting to beat

a world champion.

Usually they go home

with nothing but a story.

Down here, the millionaires are scarce

or they're playing craps,

but there's still

plenty of money for the taking.

In fact, on the weekends

you can't get a game in the city,

because all the New York rounders

are taking care of the tourists here.

Hey, hey, why don't you warm up

a seat for me. I'll catch up with you.

- What?

- Look.

- I got certain needs

I gotta attend to, okay?

- Hey, good.

- I mean, I'm overdue.

- Good, man, hey, I was startin'

to wonder about you.

I thought, maybe, you know,

the boys upstate brought about

a few changes in you.

Hey, in your dreams,

lover.

- Hey, Mikey!

- Hey.

- Hey, Mike.

This is beautiful.

Welcome to the Chesterfield south.

- Ho!

- Changing $500.

Come all the way to Atlantic City

just to see your mugs, huh?

Twice in one week.

For someone who don't play, you spend

a lot of time in card rooms.

This is what

I like to see, huh?

Mike McDermott where he belongs...

sittin' with the scumbags.

Tellin' jokes,

draggin' the occasional pot.

Occasional? Yeah, like my ex-wife

occasionally went out with other men.

Forget her, Face. I was actually gonna

try and make some real money tonight.

But in honor of Mike's

Ali-like return to the ring,

I'll sit with you all

for a while.

Hey, don't do us

any favors, Knish.

- They're about to go to

the board to fill these seats.

- Bet it.

I raise. You know, if we wanted

to take each other's rolls,

we could have just

stayed home.

[Mike Narrating]

These two have no idea...

what they're about to

walk into.

Down here to have a good time,

they figure...

why not give poker a try?

After all, how different

can it be from the home games...

they've played

their whole lives?

All the luck in the world isn't

gonna change things for these guys.

They're simply overmatched.

We're not playing together,

but then again, we're not playing

against each other either.

It's like the Nature Channel. You don't

see piranhas eating each other, do you?

They wear their tells

like signs around their necks.

Facial tics, nervous fingers.

A hand over a mouth.

The way a cigarette

is smoked.

Little unconscious gestures

that reveal the cards in their hands.

We catch everything.

If a fish acts strong,

he's bluffing.

If he acts meek,

he's got a hand. It's that simple.

- How are you, you workaholics?

- Worm.

Good to see ya.

Glad you're out.

Number's changed,

of course.

Lotta games this weekend,

so you're gonna need the number.

- I'll give you a ring.

- Hey, Worm?

Do they allow people like you

in places like this?

Zagosh, when you get yourself a job,

then you can be my f***in' P.O.

How about that?

Now, let's get started,

shall we?

I'm sorry, sir.

You can't take chips

from another player at the table.

We all know each other here.

We're like friends, so if nobody

complains, do you have a problem?

- It's all right.

- No problem.

- Sir, you have to buy 'em from me.

- [Sighs]

F*** this low-limit sh*t.

Can we go get something to eat?

I got comped at the noodle bar.

I want to talk to you.

Look who's treatin'

to a free meal.

Don't let that M.S.G. f***

up your head more than it is, Mikey.

You keep grinding out that rent money,

Joe. It's noble work you're doing.

So, hey, uh,

Nick the Greek.

What's with

kitin' my checks?

- I'm on empty, that's why.

- You are? You're tapped again?

I mean...

How much was the hooker?

- Mike, please. Relaxation therapist.

- [Chuckles]

Okay?

- It's not where it went.

- Wait a minute.

It went to

Roman and Maurice?

I told you, man, you didn't have to

give it all back to 'em.

Take a little money

for your time, you know?

Hey, that's not

where it went either.

- I ran into Grama tonight.

- Yeah?

Yeah. He took

everything I had.

You're kiddin' me.

Wait, who's he working for?

Well, he's sorta

out on his own.

This f***er went around

and bought up all my debt. Grama.

That turncoat motherf***er.

Are you kiddin' me?

So what do you owe him?

I don't know. By his crazy f***in'

gorilla math?

Like, 15.

- Fifteen? Fifteen?

- Yeah, I mean...

He says the juice has been running

the entire time on my ten.

- So, it's just like...

- Why didn't you tell me that, man?

Why did you not tell me that?

I could have paid that off.

- I had the... I had the money.

- Hey!

I'm not gonna sit in the can and have

my friend paying down my debt.

I'm not a leech,

all right?

We can help each other, like always.

That's why we're here.

That's... That's why we gotta

get in the bigger game.

- Do you hear what I'm saying?

- All right. All right.

- Listen, man, I'll help you.

You know I'll help you, man.

- Yeah?

- I mean, f*** that guy.

We'll figure something out.

- Yeah.

How long

should we wait?

I suggest we wait another five minutes,

and then choose another lead counsel.

Here he comes.

Mr. McDermott,

perhaps we can begin now.

I'm so sorry I'm late.

Come to order in the matter

of Slater v. New York State

Higher Education Services.

The facts have been stipulated,

the briefs have been read.

Lead counsel for plaintiff,

Mr. McDermott,

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