Runaway Bride Page #6

Kid agrees. Ike puts the hat on and starts to cross the street.

An OLD WOMAN walks by and hits him with a newspaper. Ike is

stunned.

EXT. MAGGIE'S HOUSE - DUSK

Maggie pulls into the driveway in her truck. She's in a fine

mood as she walks right in the house.

INT. MAGGIE'S HOUSE - DUSK

Bob, Walter, and Maggie's GRANDMOTHER JULIA sit in the living

room. Grandma is sewing one of Maggie's wedding veils. Walter

drinks wine, Ike wears a hat.

WALTER:

You know, when I only see one dog, I

know I've had too much to drink.

Te family dog, Skipper, sits near a ceramic dog table. Maggie

smiles as she walks in the front door and puts down her tool box

and bag.

MAGGIE:

You'll never guess who came crawling

into town with his tail between his

legs.

IKE (o.s.)

Who?

Maggie enters the parlor to see Ike smiling evilly from his seat

on the couch.

IKE (cont'd)

(innocently)

Hello, Maggie. I just came by to

apologize to your family.

(looks to Walter)

When I'm wrong, I'm wrong. I pushed a

story. I made a mistake.

WALTER:

In other words -- he's only human. An

he brought us a bottle of wine.

Raises the bottle to Maggie.

IKE:

They made me put my hat back on.

WALTER:

Oh, yeah. Scared the hell out of

Skipper.

MAGGIE:

You've got to be kidding me.

Maggie stares at them both.

BOB:

(enjoying the moment)

No, no, you should have seen Skipper.

(then, imitates

growling)

It wasn't that funny.

Maggie gives him a look that says, "You are not absolved." She

smiles stiffly, looking back at Ike. She then sits on the arm

of Bob's chair and puts her arm on his shoulder.

MAGGIE:

So, the forces of good and evil have

already met.

Maggie takes the wine bottle from the table next to Walter. She

snaps a look to Bob, who follows her.

BOB:

I'll help you take into the kitchen.

GRANDMA JULIA:

Check on the crabs, Bob.

We overhear them murmuring in annoyed tones about the wedding

plans as they exit... Walter puts down his drink.

IKE:

Gee, I hope they don't have a fight out

there. You don't think they'll call it

off...?

WALTER:

Well, wedding cake freezes. This we

know.

IKE:

You know, your daughter seems...

Ike notices that he's been sewn to the veil.

GRANDMA JULIA:

Sorry.

IKE:

That's okay, Grandma.

Grandma cuts the thread and separates the veil from Ike's sleeve.

IKE (cont'd)

(continuing his thought)

... Like such a lovely girl.

Walter points to a portrait painting on the wall.

WALTER:

Like her mother.

IKE:

(seeing the portrait)

Ah, beautiful.

(gets up to admire

the portrait)

I just can't see her leaving multiple

grooms in the dust like that.

GRANDMA JULIA:

Oh, yes, you can. She's has 'em all on

tape.

IKE:

She has a tape?

WALTER:

(good-natured)

Yeah. Lee at the hotel videos wedding.

I mean Maggie didn't know she was going

to make the hundred-yard dash.

Walter gestures to a pile of video cassettes on the bookcase.

Ike checks on the tapes.

IKE:

Dad's fishing trip, Grandma's knee

operation, Grandma's birthday...

WALTER:

Gotta tell you this about my daughter.

My daughter makes real good time, even

in a long dress and heels. Maggie may

not be Hale's longest running joke, but

she certainly is the fastest.

Walter cracks up.

GRANDMA JULIA:

(sarcastically)

Ha ha.

CLOSE ON:
A tape. It reads: "Maggie I, II, III." Ike's

interest is more than piqued. Ike picks it up. They get up and

go to the dining room.

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. DINNING ROOM/MAGGIE'S HOUSE - NIGHT

The family dog, Skipper, steals food from the table. Walter

scolds him. Walter whacks his crab with his hammer and Ike

copies him.

WALTER (cont'd)

Emma and I were only blessed with one

child, not for lacking of trying.

MAGGIE:

This is good, Dad, don't leave anything

out.

Ike's hammer flies out of his hand. He goes to pick it up.

WALTER:

So I've come to see it as a bonus,

really, that we've been able to plan,

and pay for, so many weddings.

MAGGIE:

Not this one. This one's on me.

Walter reacts.

IKE:

That's fair.

MAGGIE:

Despite what you think, I don't do it

on purpose. And I have no intention of

doing it again.

BOB:

That's right, Maggie. Just keep your

eye on the ball.

Ike raises his eyebrows in question. Bob explains.

BOB (cont'd)

Sports psychology. It was my major in

college.

IKE:

Ahh.

BOB:

(false modesty)

I'm the town's unofficial fitness

trainer. Big advocate of the mind and

body combining for success. You could

say or you can quote me, I'm a glass

half full king of guy.

MAGGIE:

(boasting)

Bob's the head of the P.E. department

at the high school. And he coaches the

football team. And he's climbed

Everest.

To Maggie's satisfaction, Ike shoots Bob a look of begrudging

respect. Nobody who's been up Everest is a total clown.

IKE:

(impressed)

Everest. Is that right?

MAGGIE:

Twice...

IKE:

Really?

MAGGIE:

(sticking it to Ike)

Without oxygen...

BOB:

My girl likes to brag about me.

Bob and Maggie kiss Ike two little love-birds.

BOB (cont'd)

I'm taking her trekking on Annapurna on

our honeymoon.

Ike is highly amused.

IKE:

How romantic.

MAGGIE:

(sharply)

We think so.

IKE:

Nothing like sharing your nuptial bed

with two Sherpas and a yak.

Walter cracks up, Maggie shoots Ike a look. He smiles back.

CUT TO:

INT. IKE'S HOTEL ROOM/INT. FISHER AND ELLIE'S BEDROOM (NYC)

INTERCUT TELEPHONE CONVERSATION

Fisher and Ellie are exercising. Fisher is on a cycle machine.

Ellie does yoga stretches. Ike sits back on the couch, puts on

his glasses and watches a video taped wedding playing on the TV

screen. Superimposed titles read "Brian Norris wedding."

IKE:

(to Fisher; into phone)

You won't believe what I'm looking at,

Fisher. A videotape of all three train

wrecks.

THE TV - CLOSE

Two flower girls and Peggy enter a crowded church where the

groom, Brian, and his best man wait at the altar.

Now we see Maggie come down the aisle, then walk past the altar.

We see Maggie move away another aisle and out of the church.

SHOCKED WEDDING GUESTS rise in horror, as she runs from this

first wedding. She drags the train boy up the second aisle as

she leaves. Ike hangs up. He gets up to pick up the remote and

then sits back down to watch.

The tape fast-forwards to the next wedding. Now Ike is looking

at a much more relaxed, hipper, backyard wedding. It says,

"Gill Chavez Wedding". He hits the fast-forward button

(sometimes slowing down).

ON TV:

We see the Carpenter's backyard. It is Gill and Maggie's

wedding day. The yard is crowded with a MIXTURE of Hells

Angels-types, Deadheads and townspeople. The "altar" is a band

platform against the back fence.

Gill is waiting on the platform with a rock combo playing

Grateful Dead-type music. He makes an introductory speech.

Maggie steps out onto the back porch. She's beautiful in a

hippie-type wedding ensemble. She walks with her father to a

trampoline. We can see her tattoo. She jumps on the trampoline,

then dives into the crowd. They watch her and body surf her

over their heads to the back fence.

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