Rupture: A Matter of Life OR Death Page #5

I am, indeed. I know, we both...

Both my gentleman, as I call him,

and I have a piece of titanium in our heads.

Keith Richards has got a piece of titanium, but bigger.

He's got a sort of plate.

- Oh, he's got a plate? - I think

so. - And you have a little...?

- I have a tiny, little titanium coil.

- It's a coil, OK.

But the titanium club is an exclusive club,

which you belong to, as well, I think.

I think I have changed since the operation.

Definitely, there's no question about it. I mean, I am much more...

I'm much more emotional...

..now. And I think because I'm more touched by...

by pain in others, definitely.

I am more succinct with it, I am more connected with it.

This is Monty.

He had an AVM when he was eight years old.

And here he is with his dog, Jack.

I was just playing sport, I was running around,

and then I got a headache, so I sat down.

And then I asked if I could go to the nurse.

And I just went to the nurse and suddenly I just puked and fainted.

- So, it was really quick, it happened very quickly?

- Yeah.

And then I just remember one little scene of me having a mask on

and the doctors, like, bringing air in.

- Trying to revive you?

- Yeah.

We had to wait for scans and...

- So you had no idea what was going on?

- No.

They did an MRI trying to see what was the next step.

They knew that there was a bleed, a big one,

but that was all we knew. We didn't know why or how.

It wasn't initially apparent what had caused this bleed,

so we took him to the angiography suite, did in angiogram

that demonstrated an AVM, an arteriovenous malformation,

which is an abnormal connection between the arteries and veins

on the surface of the brain.

The way I embolise an AVM is to go in the artery in the groin,

put a catheter up into the main arteries to the brain in the neck,

and then through that, put a second micro catheter

about half a millimetre in diameter into one of the arteries

going into the AVM itself

and then inject some kind of liquid that mixes with the blood

and sits to form a plug filling the abnormal vessels

of the AVM and stopping blood flow in the AVM.

There are two main things I use - glue,

where I inject a mix of the blood and it sets and forms a cast

or onyx, which is a kind of rubbery material which I inject slowly,

watching to see where it goes within the AVM.

If I'm happy where it goes, I keep injecting it and it will gradually

fill the nidus of the AVM, the network of vessels of the AVM.

And if it starts to go toward one of the arteries that supplies

the normal brain, I'll stop, wait,

let it sit, and then start injecting again,

hoping it goes back in the direction I want it to.

What would you want the most right now?

Um...

To see my dog.

What do you think it is about an animal that helps?

Well, they are very loving and caring.

Are you both inseparable?

Yeah.

- Do you miss him now?

- Yes.

- You want to go and play with him now?

- Yeah.

My brain haemorrhage was a glimpse into this other world,

but now I am so much more aware of other forms of brain damage

and how crushing the effects can be.

And how invisible it is to others.

Yes, that's true.

Problems with memory and concentration

or changes in personality are not immediately obvious.

If they don't have conspicuous disabilities,

the brain injured go unnoticed.

And misunderstood.

It is across the board, every aspect of the person's life,

from their social, intellectual functional, vocational...

Every aspect of their life is affected.

And it's invisible.

Sherrie Baehr who has initiated this charity called the Silver Lining

that belongs to them, to those brain injured,

and they have to raise money for their own charity.

And with that money, they go

and help other people that are more disadvantaged than themselves.

And it re-engages them in life, gives them a focus, a purpose,

and they feel useful.

I think one of the biggest problems I've had

since the accident is it was never properly followed up.

And I had the injury, I was in hospital for quite a while,

and then they just let me go. And no-one saw me.

Until I saw Sherrie last year,

no-one spoke to me about the car accident.

So, I spent grammar school thinking I was really quite stupid,

with memory problems, etc.

And I never knew it was because of my brain injury.

People tend to get burned out after a while.

Because the progress in brain injury is so slow.

Why is that?

Well, the brain heals itself very slowly.

Is that why a lot of brain injured then sort of get into depressions?

- Because they're not seeing a progression.

- Absolutely.

OK, when I was 21,

I got hit by a car and I fell back.

Fortunately for me, I broke a windscreen,

cos I hit the left-hand side of my brain,

so that affected my speech.

Because I often think, if I hit the right side,

my speech would be normal,

but then maybe I would forget things

or maybe... It would be so different.

But no, it's... You know.

So, that's why I sound drunk, and I'm not.

Return to previous social relationships is not possible.

Family relationships are often very changed.

And what people naturally do is you don't really want to be

around someone that you have problems with all the time.

I was assaulted and somebody stabbed a snooker cue

through my right eye socket,

through my brain, to the back of my skull.

It's quite an abstract thing to sort of come to terms with,

a brain injury. It's slightly nebulous.

Confidence is a major issue afterwards.

And sort of, self-identity even.

Ed has spent, and I hope I am not over exaggerating,

but the last ten years hardly getting out of bed.

Not engaging with the community or life at all.

And Ed is quite an inspiration for the Silver Lining for me

because when I saw Ed in Namibia,

he was the first one up in the morning.

Yeah, Namibia was just a wonderful opportunity to,

instead of, I guess, being brain injured,

feeling like a bit of a burden on the state,

it was nice to be able to sort of help other people

and give something back.

And, uh...

The children we met out there were just a massive inspiration,

full of life and joy, despite very meagre circumstances.

It can't be easy being an orphan in Africa.

So, yeah, that was... That was a real privilege.

Of course you give hope, you have to give hope constantly

to the sufferer,

to the injured person,

who is in a kind of desert of his or her own,

as they struggle to find a way out and to live.

And then it occurred to me,

a memory that I had of when I was working in Africa over many years.

I'd been to the Namibian desert, where the desert elephant,

who moves in a family group out of this barren land.

And this mammal, this largest mammal on earth,

has the ability to feel, to suffer, feel grief and pain.

They show hate and they show love, like us humans do.

But they also have the most incredible memory.

And that memory serves to cross these vast,

barren landscapes

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