Rush Page #2

I fall out with people left and right.

The only creatures I've ever really

loved or have treated honourably

are budgerigars.

So in any normal area of life I'd be...

or I am, a total liability.

The only thing I've got going for me

is I'm quick in a car.

So, thank you for this

and for acknowledging that.

I'm going to give it to my father

and tell him to put it

on the mantelpiece

and imagine it's a first-class degree

in medicine.

Well done, Superstar.

Another season like that

and I'll move you up to the big time.

Come on, you don't think I'm ready now?

You are. I'm not.

I've got to find you a car first.

Well, go on, then. Chop-chop.

Don't wait too long. You don't want him

to do what Lauda just did.

- Why? What did he do?

- Got himself a drive with BRM.

Well, how the hell did he do that?

He's a nobody.

He's never won a bloody thing.

Apparently, took out a loan

and bought his way in

with two million Austrian schillings.

Jesus.

Niki Lauda.

Here for pre-season testing. BRM?

Sign the release form.

I'll let them know you're here.

- Mr Stanley.

- Good morning.

- Good morning.

- Good morning. Clay!

Let me introduce you

to our number-one driver,

Clay Regazzoni.

- How are you?

- Good.

- Pleasure.

- And these are your mechanics.

They're reporting exclusively to you,

as per contract.

Pleasure. Do you wanna see the car?

Sure.

Hello.

There she is. P160.

- Same as Regazzoni's?

- Identical in every detail.

How much does she weigh?

- 600 kilos.

- But that's crazy.

- Why so heavy?

- It's a V12 engine.

That lump weighs 190K on its own.

Okay.

What horsepower are you getting? 490?

- No, no, 450.

- Well, it's not enough.

It needs to be 500,

and the engine

needs to be 20 kilo lighter.

We already tried.

- Tried what?

- Everything.

We replaced the entire exhaust system.

- Barely made a difference.

- Are you using magnesium parts?

Now the engine block.

Any mounting or fixing plates,

strip it out also.

When you've done that,

we have to look at the aerodynamics,

front and rear wing.

Okay, thank you. Good night.

What was Regazzoni's time?

Okay, now put him in my car,

and he'll go round two seconds faster.

- Well, that's impossible.

- No chance.

We've been working on it all night.

Put Regazzoni in the car.

See what happens.

I don't understand.

Why am I supposed to do this?

I don't know, Clay.

He just wants you to take it for a spin.

Gloves, please.

'fanculo.

- I would say we push it a bit...

- All right.

What did you do to the car?

That's information I will share with you

under certain conditions only.

Go on.

A guaranteed place in the team,

and a paid contract on equal terms

with Regazzoni for two years.

Are you crazy?

Clay's a senior figure in Formula 1.

You're just a rookie.

Well, the only reason we took you on

is because you're paying us.

Well, as of now, if you want me to stay,

we rip up the contract.

- I don't pay you a cent.

- That's outrageous!

Was he quicker in my car?

He was, wasn't he?

Did he go two seconds faster?

2.3.

So, have a think,

work out your priorities

and get back to me.

Hey, Niki.

I know what you're going to say,

that it's none of my business.

What?

If it's the track manager

you're taking on your date tonight...

It's none of your business.

Okay, but if you want my advice,

I'd let this one go.

I'm not questioning your taste.

She is a great girl, but...

Agnes's last boyfriend

was a British Formula 2 driver

who has a reputation for two things.

For being a little crazy on the track,

and for going all night and all day

and all night again in bed.

He's a good driver,

but an immortal f***, apparently.

I don't know about you, but

that's not an act I'd like to follow.

But if that doesn't bother you...

What's his name, the driver?

Hunt. James Hunt.

You see, you share information

and I share information.

That's what teammates are for.

Where the hell are we going?

I promise

it'll be worth it.

Just keep them closed.

Wait for it.

Wait for it.

There. What do you say?

She's Formula 1.

Yes, she is, Superstar.

Your brother and I got together

with the bean counters.

And since the economics of F1

are not so significantly different

to the economics of Formula 2,

well, we thought if we were

going to be losing money,

we might as well be doing it on

the big roulette table in Formula 1.

You fat, little, inbred beauty.

Come here.

Actually, credit where it's due,

we got the idea from Niki.

- Who?

- Lauda.

Bought his way in, rather than

mess about in the lower divisions.

I thought, "Bloody hell, he's right."

No sponsorship, Superstar.

I hope you approve.

No vulgar logos

for cigarettes or condoms.

Just plain white with the flags. Ooh!

And racing overalls which read,

"Sex. Breakfast of champions."

So, when do we start?

- Soon as you're ready.

- Ready?

I've been waiting for this

my whole life.

- Hi, welcome to Watkins Glen.

- Hello!

When the season started,

people wondered

whether Lord Hesketh and his team

of upper-class enthusiasts

were bringing glamour

to the racing community, or just comedy.

Certainly, it was the first time

anyone had seen

a butler serving oysters and caviar

in the pits.

But they have made quite an impact.

Sixth in France, fourth in Britain

and third in Holland.

AH drivers on the track,

caution flags are out.

A severe crash at the Esses.

Red flag.

There is a car off the track.

And reports are reaching me

that there has been

a serious accident in qualifying.

Er, the identity of the driver we don't

currently have at the moment,

but, as you can tell

from all the activity

going on behind me towards the track,

it is clearly a grave incident indeed.

We will, of course,

have more information for you

as and when we get it,

but it is the sight and sound

of Formula 1 nobody likes to see.

- Get your hands off me.

- Hey, come on.

Drivers of top stature

we've lost just in the past four seasons

have included Piers Courage,

Jochen Rindt,

Jo Siffert, Roger Williamson

and today, at Watkins Glen,

Formula 1 has claimed another driver.

The Tyrrell team

have withdrawn from the race.

Their places on the grid

will be left empty.

- Terrible.

- They should cancel the race.

Why?

He made a mistake,

went into the corner too fast.

It's his fault.

- Is that right?

- It's obvious.

Look at the tyre marks.

So says the nobody

who had to pay for his own drive.

How's that working out for you,

by the way?

Fine. How is it at the back?

Not planning on being there for long.

Ten minutes to the warm-up lap.

Ten minutes.

Arsehole.

Heading into

the Grand Hotel hairpin, second gear.

Turn in hard,

looking for late apex,

gentle with the bar.

Heading into Portier, second gear,

clip the apex,

light brake, stay in second,

looking for a good exit.

Heading through the tunnel,

gradual right,

up through third, fourth, fifth...

ls Alexander round?

Er, yes, he was.

He went back to the house

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