Salaam Namaste Page #2

No.

Don't feel bad, next time you will.

By the way,

l'll need your car tomorrow.

Okay ? Thank you ! Bye !

Why the hell do you want

to ruin my reputation ?

You forgot the bay leaf,

the cardamom is almost non-existent

And please, eveybody, come here.

Just because salt is cheap does..

..not mean we need to put it in everything.

We are not in lndia now...

please, go easy on the salt.

Now, l need to go and pee.

Promise me...

You won't use the next five

minutes to ruin another dish.

Promise me !

We promise, boss !

Thank you ! Excuse me.

Looks just like home-cooked food.

- Thank you boss

So who needs to eat out ?

They could have just made this at home.

Do you know the difference

between a wife and a mistress ?

l don't have either, boss.

No ?

A wife wears a sari,

a mistress wears a micro-mini.

A wife wears a wedding thread,

for the mistress, a diamond necklace.

A wife wears a cotton nightgown,

the mistress gets a red lingerie.

And that is now a mistress.

Get it ? Good.

Boss. Dheka's looking for you. - So ?

He looks quite angy !

- Tell me something l don't know.

l've dammed a waterfall here.

lt's amazing how Aslam Dheka flew from..

..Dhaka to Melbourne on one ticket.

He sat on two seats

and ate enough food for three.

The sound of his belch is

still echoing in that Boeing 7 47.

He spent his life savings

in buying a hot dog stall.

Dheka was a happy man...

..he ate some and he sold some.

Then luck smiled on him.

While a lawyer was eating his last hot..

..dog a drunken driver

trashed his car.

They sued and Dheka struck gold.

Overnight he became the owner

and chief patron of 'Nick of Time'.

You see ?

See what ?

See nothing ! No people,

no customers, no-one ! Why ?

How should l know ?

Salaam Namaste ! (Greetings)

Same to you.

All this happening because

of your radio station !

You are going late and my

restaurant is being insulted.

Now you better not being late,

ever again !

And if you are, l will fire you !

Understand.

Tomorrow, ten o' clock sharp !

Understand ? Otherwise...

Fire ?

Murder !

Are you hearing the radio ?

No, what is happening ?

You put on radio and listen.

So Radhika, your first novel

is releasing tomorrow.

How are you going to celebrate ?

l guess l'll celebrate with my husband.

Romantic dinner,

pop some champagne.

Which restaurant ?

Not Nick of Time, l hope ?

Why ? l've heard it's a nice place.

Come on Radhika.

Eating what someone else has cooked is..

..like putting your life in their hands.

Like a doctor, right ? - Right.

Then can you trust a man who lies,

who is never on time and...

who doesn't even have the decency

to apologise for making you wait ?

l think it's disgusting. Tell me...

Would you tolerate this

behaviour from your husband ?

l'm sory, but what's the connection ?

- There is a connection !

How can you trust a man

who's ashamed to be an lndian ?

My god, you're really angy.

Yes. And Mr Nikhil Arora

will have to face my anger until...

he calls and apologises to my listeners.

lt'll just break.

Oh come on Dheka,

who listens to that show anyway ?

l will tell you who is listening.

My wife is listening,

my son is listening.

My family is listening,

eveybody is calling

and asking me, what is this ?

They're all freeloaders anyway.

Think of all the money you'll save.

l will kill you. For the bad name

you are giving to my restaurant,

l'll kill you.

Dheka, relax. You'll have a hear attack.

l'll just call Hambar and fix everything.

Good. Are you at the wedding ?

- Just parking my car.

l'm almost there, yaar.

Hello ? Hello, l can't hear you.

Nice day isn't it ?

l'm Ron.....Ron.

l'm Lisa.

Lisa. Lisa's such a nice name,

Lisa. What do you do, Lisa ?

For 50 bucks, anything you want.

During his college days,

Ranjan Mathur was so busy studying...

that he was oblivious to the basic

differences between boys and girls.

Although he became

a successful architect,

his vision cleared up one day,

when he suddenly realized that

the world didn't just

consist of buildings.

There were other shapes as well

and they were much more interesting.

Since then, he has been

wearing his hear on his sleeve,

aiming for evey girl

crossing his sights,

hoping that someday, somehow...

he'll manage to snag

one for himself.

l've got to go... Thank you...

- Ok... Ok... Fory...

Who was that ?

A friend.

From office ?

- No. She lives nearby.

What was her name ? - Lisa.

Let's give her a lift, yaar.

The poor girl's standing

all alone at the bus stop.

No.

She's going the other way.

So it's pointless.

What... ? - How much was she asking for ?

Fory dollars.

Ron ! Can't you tell ?

How could l ? She smiled sweetly,

shook hands, even said her name.

l thought she was so friendly.

You must've stared planning

your wedding already.

What rubbish ! l'm not that frustrated.

Only the engagement.

Tell me something,

why am l coming with you ?

Because weddings are vey boring

and l don't want to get bored alone.

Thanks - You're welcome.

So, what are we listening ?

Salaam Namaste.

What ? - l love to hear

you being praised on air.

Oh crap ! You've heard it too ?

Of course, it's damn good fun !

That RJ is making you famous.

You think this is funny ? - Vey.

You're laughing and l've lost

half my clientele at the restaurant.

Sue them.

Sue the damn radio station, yeah ?

Causing of emotional distress,

mental trauma, character assassination.

Hang on, let me just

call that Debonair character.

You be ready with this.

Hello.

l am going to sue you !

Who is speaking please ?

- This is Nick and l am going to sue you.

What for ? - What for ! For...

emotional distress and...

- Mental trauma, character assassination.

l'm with a vey big lawyer right now !

- My friend is with a vey big lawyer.

No, no ! Not me ! You, you are

! - No-no... you, you.

My friend is a vey big lawyer.

See, Mr Nikhil Arora...

Stop calling me that !

lf one more person calls me

Nikhil Arora, then l will... l'll...

l'll never talk to you again.

- l'll never talk...

Sory yaar, l couldn't think of anything else.

Listen ! Why don't you

talk directly to Hambar ?

Oh sure, come on.

Give me Hambar's number.

Don't wory. l will

connect you. Hold on.

Hello listeners.

Breaking news on Salaam Namaste.

Nikhil Arora has just

called to apologise to Hambar.

We are taking you live to the conversation.

Hello.

Hambar ?

Ambar. The name is Ambar.

A, A for Ambar.

Oh... and the name is Nick,

not Nikhil Arora, Okay ?

You ! - Yes !

So you've finally decided

to be sensible and say sory.

Sory ? Are you crazy ?

l'm calling because...

what you're doing is not right.

And what am l doing ?

You're ruining my reputation.

How ?

By calling me Nikhil Arora for a star.

Oh, l am so sory.

l had no idea you hated your name so much.

l won't do it again.

Thank you.

Nikhil Arora.

Nikhil... Arora.

Stop it !

Star singing her name as well.

What are you doing ?

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