Scalawag Page #3

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- Un momento.

An expedition of this nature

is not for a lady.

Mr. Aragon, there are

lots of things I can do.

Well, I can cook and so and

Get your skillet.

Oh, no.

Mr. Aragon is taking me on a trip.

A real adventure.

What for?

To help herd sheep.

Indian, bandit country.

Sheep.

Boy, that's a slow way to travel.

Wish you had come too, Mr. Stewart.

I wish you'd stop calling me

Mr. Stewart like I was great folks.

Call me Peg.

All right, sir.

Peg.

- That's better.

You ever fight Indians?

Did I ever fight Indians?

You notice the way I was sitting?

With my fighting tools handy.

Walked that way too.

You gotta be real careful in Indian country.

A man never knows what's lurking.

Always keep your fighting tools close by.

Yes, sir. Okay.

Let's say I was walking along,

minding my own business.

When out of nowhere

pop eight scalp hunters.

Yowl. Get the wagons in a circle.

Guard the womenfolk.

Send someone back to the fort for help.

This one's mine.

I missed.

We're running out of water.

Keep down.

Ha, let's kill them all.

Well done.

Ha.

One. Two. Three.

Four. Five. Six.

That's only seven.

I got the ace in my bare hand.

Go get my fighting tools.

Seor Stewart,

I would like you to join us.

As an Indian fighter.

I would gladly pay two dollars a day.

That's mighty generous of you.

But this warped timber of mine

it ain't got many more miles left in it.

You just have your men

carve me up a good oaken leg.

And leave Jamie home.

I'll go in his place.

Here, Peg.

I can't make chicken dinner

without chicken.

Take this in.

Sure, Peg.

Is it a deal?

The boy stays here.

It won't take me a minute.

I'll fetch my gear.

Jamie.

- Sir?

I can't take you with me.

What?

Miss Lucy-Ann would not sleep

a wink while you were gone.

But... I'm big enough.

But a woman's small. Delicate.

Delicate? Lucy-Ann?

You are big enough.

Big enough to look after your sister.

Jamie.

A ripping tooth from the biggest grizzly

this side of the Mississippi.

You almost got me, tooth.

I want you to wear it for good luck.

Baba Russo.

- Coming up.

Adios.

You'll take care of yourself.

Good luck.

Watch the leather.

You hurry back.

I made candy out of cactus once.

Cactus?

What'd it taste like?

- Candy.

You use the thorns to pick your teeth.

Can't you stand still long enough

for me to get a measurement?

Sandy, don't you make that leg too short.

I don't want to limp.

Joe, Gen. Jackson once said to me. I

used to cook for general Jackson.

He said 'Peg. You give me the finest

case of indigestion I've ever had.'

He said that?

- That's what he said.

Benjamin, compasa.

What's that all about?

Hey, Jamie.

Jamie?

Did something happen to Lucy-Ann?

- No, sir.

You deserted her?

I never would've gone off

without permission.

No, sir. Never.

First thing in the morning,

you're going right back.

Get something to eat.

Hi, Peg.

Mr. Stewart, to you.

He knows we're looking.

Nothing to drink the coffee.

You'll have to do without.

Oh, I drink coffee all the time.

Hardly had time to catch your breath.

And you told another lie.

Here.

Thanks.

Mmm. It's great.

What is it?

- Snake stew.

I like the bear's tooth.

Thanks.

Oh.

I brought you a Bible, Peg.

Huh?

Mr. Stewart.

Lucy-Ann dug it out of my mom's old trunk.

The paper's thin.

And it's old, just like you wanted.

A Bible?

Jamie.

Yes, sir.

- Get some sleep.

But I ain't going back.

I'm sorry, Miss Lucy.

For all the trouble he's caused you.

But you take him back

and make sure he stays.

I left San Juan.

- You what?

I closed up the inn.

I figured we might as well both go along.

Look, let me take them both back home.

Oh he had only run off again.

I won't permit you to do this.

But you can't stop me, Mr. Aragon.

I've already done this.

All right. But be here it like a lady.

Even if you don't look like one.

Told you I wasn't going back.

I'll tell you something.

If you end up crow bait,

it'll be your own fault.

Indian country.

I'll scout up ahead.

I'll swing around the other side.

Well, be careful.

Stop mothering everybody.

Shut up.

Hey.

What happened?

Indians.

Slow drowning.

God save America.

Hold on.

I'm coming for you.

Stay there, lad.

Go back. Save the others.

Oh. Thank you.

You're a brave man, Mr. Aragon.

Very brave.

Help.

Grab on. Quick.

Thank you. Thank you.

Doing our duty, sir.

I'm an Indian.

Ai-ya-ai-yo.

How can we ever repay you?

Repay your brothers.

Oh.

May the Lord lift up his countenance

onto thee and grant thee peace.

Oh.

How can we ever repay you?

Gentlemen,

we are shorthanded in event of attack.

I can offer a dollar a day

and excellent meals.

A dollar a day?

That ain't bad.

- I'll get my men.

We'll be right back.

Mr. Aragon.

I reckon you know what you're doing.

Those critters look awful ugly to me.

I want them to fight Indians.

Not to look at.

Trust my judgment, Mr. Stewart.

Yeah, I wish I could trust mine.

People have been able to fool me all my life.

Baa-a-a.

Baa-a-a.

You are on guard duty tonight.

Hey, look.

Vultures picked him clean.

That's murders.

Lost a lot of weight, huh?

It's you, Mud.

Mmmm, real tasty.

When are you getting your new leg?

Eh, pretty soon now.

Pretty soon.

How's your old one holding out?

- Fine.

Every man should have one.

Look. You can use it as a weapon. Ha.

Huh?

A hat rack.

A knife rack.

That's wonderful.

Now look.

You can stoke the fire.

Stir the stew.

Huh?

Now you stir it for a while.

Oh, I can do that.

Hey. Not with your foot.

Here. Use this. Go on.

Go on. Give it to him.

Well, I'll be.

Amigos.

Hey, Jamie.

That's a beauty.

Why, a king would be proud

to wear a leg like that.

Let me try it on.

Yeah.

Let me see it.

Jamie, look at that.

Hey.

I wish I had one.

Well, Benjamin just wants you to work.

Now that's a leg, I tell you.

Fit for a King. Ha.

Dirty petticoats.

Shark got a leg or two.

Glad he didn't get more.

One day, thank the Lord,

someone pushed him overboard.

And he swam and he swam.

But he never reached the shore.

Poor man ain't with us anymore.

There you go. There you go.

Yes you know when your number's up,

you go.

Get your whiskey. Get your wine.

Get your women. Don't take mine.

Because you know

when your number's up, you go.

Oh you go. Yes you know when

your number's up, you go.

When I was a gypsy,

And so far from the water.

I'm so much in love

with a pretty bosun's daughter.

But one day her husband...

...came knocking at the door-o.

And Fly Speck went a fly

from the very next porthole.

He's never been in love

Any more-o. More-o.

Never been in love anymore.

There you go. Don't you know?

That you go when your number's up,

you go.

You can be the boss for long.

Take a girl and meet her mom.

But you know when your number's up,

you really have to go.

Yes you know when your number's up,

you go.

There you go. There you go.

Yes you know when your number's up,

you go.

With a tankard in your hand,

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