Scoop Page #9

Synopsis: In the funeral of the famous British journalist Joe Strombel, his colleagues and friends recall how obstinate he was while seeking for a scoop. Meanwhile the deceased Joe discloses the identity of the tarot card serial killer of London. He cheats the Reaper and appears to the American student of journalism Sondra Pransky, who is on the stage in the middle of a magic show of the magician Sidney Waterman in London, and tells her that the murderer is the aristocrat Peter Lyman. Sondra drags Sid in her investigation, seeking for evidences that Peter is the killer. However, she falls in love with him and questions if Joe Strombel is right in his scoop.
Genre: Comedy, Crime, Mystery
Director(s): Woody Allen
Production: Focus Features
  1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
6.7
Metacritic:
48
Rotten Tomatoes:
40%
PG-13
Year:
2006
96 min
$10,467,056
Website
1,580 Views


so everything's fine.

Of course, along the

route I fell for you,

and now

I totally blew it, and...

Who told you this?

Oh, a newspaperman.

He's now deceased.

Very foolish.

He was eager

for his last scoop.

Oh, I'm so sorry. I just

totally understand if you never

want to speak to me again

- or if you don't want to see me...

- Miss Pransky.

Not only am I not angry

with you, but you...

- You've absolutely made my day!

- What?

Just suspecting that I could

be such an imaginative,

dramatic fiend.

I love it.

- You do?

- Yes.

I think it's one of the funniest, craziest

things I've ever heard in my life.

I can't wait to tell

the chaps at the club.

Peter?

Yes, darling.

I have to ask you something.

Yes, anything. Absolutely.

Why did you hide that Tarot

deck in your music room?

How do you know about that?

I was so paranoid. I...

It's crazy.

But I snuck in.

Oh, dear,

it was going to be a surprise.

I bought them for you.

They're Victorian Tarot cards.

You told me you were

into that kind of thing.

- What? Oh...

- It was gonna be a gift for you.

Oh, you're so...

I feel like such an idiot!

Darling, no, no, no, never mind, never mind.

What a shame.

- Let's forget about it.

- No...

Huh? Let's just...

Now that we've confessed our sins,

let's move on with our lives, huh?

Really?

Yeah. I want to hear

all about the real you.

And I assure you in advance,

I'll love it.

Oh, God,

you snuck into

my music room, did you?

So the reason

why he was skulking around,

was 'cause he had

this private family business

which is too delicate

to discuss, actually.

Sorry, I don't buy it.

What?

The man is a liar

and a murderer.

And I say that

with all due respect.

Sidney. Child, I know

what I'm talking about.

Don't call me that, all right?

Do you remember when we

were out on the estate,

I found a clue,

you thought I was nuts?

I thought you were

nuts so many times

I can't recall the exact one.

Do you remember this?

Do you remember this little item?

This clue?

Yes, Betty G.

Yes, Betty G.

Now, I checked all the

girls that were murdered.

The one that was killed the night we

saw Peter on the street, was named

Elizabeth Gibson.

So?

So Betty is short for

Elizabeth a lot of times.

Oh, come on, Sidney.

That's a real stretch.

You're reaching now.

Look, supposing you wanted to rub

somebody out and not get caught.

Nobody wants

to get caught, Sidney.

Look,

he wants to get rid of Elizabeth Gibson.

Betty Gibson. Betty Gibson.

So, there's a series of murders

with a guy that's got a real style.

A Tarot card.

They said

he was a total maniac.

He buys a Tarot deck

and let's say he hides it.

Hypothetically, he hides it,

let's say, in a music room.

- Let's say he hides it in,

- Oh, Sidney!

Let's say, a French horn.

In a French horn!

I'm losing patience with you.

I'm not saying the guy

did all the murders.

I'm saying that he just did

Elizabeth Gibson,

then folded it into the series of the

Tarot Killer so he wouldn't get caught.

Henry Banks

confessed to all the murders.

Henry Banks is deranged!

He hallucinates!

My God.

Henry... And you know those guys

like to brag when they get caught.

Henry Banks, you know...

Where are you going?

The cops will dump every

unsolved murder on Henry Banks.

They haven't

caught anybody in years.

- Peter wouldn't hurt a fly.

- Oh, really?

What about a fly who speaks?

- What?

- Yes.

Why would Peter

kill a prostitute?

Because it looks terrible

on his resume.

Who knows what kind of

sordid life this guy has?

Have you completely

lost your mind?

What is wrong with you?

Peter being blackmailed

by a prostitute?

It's ridiculous.

What are you putting

in your Metamucil?

You know...

Where are you going?

You don't understand!

It would kill his reputation!

Oh, can you bring

the water out?

Can I say one thing?

Can I just tell you one thing?

Joe Strombel

would not agree with you.

I don't want to talk about

Joe Strombel, all right?

Even a great reporter

can be wrong.

But he's not wrong.

Blackmail. I see it all over.

You are a cynical crapehanger

who always sees the

glass half-empty!

No, you're wrong.

I see the glass half-full,

but of poison.

And you're gonna

wind up drinking it!

You don't know anything.

You don't have a reporter's

instincts, okay?

You're some guy who

vanishes silk handkerchiefs

and cuts people's neckties off.

Do everybody a favor.

Go back to your card tricks, all right?

Did you tell her?

I did. I told her.

And I made it seem as though it

all suddenly just came to me.

I know I'm right.

She just won't listen to me.

She hates me.

Yeah. I... You know,

sometimes, I got to say,

I worry about that girl.

I don't think

I'll be seeing you anymore.

Well, if there's a scoop

to be had here,

she's going to get it for you.

You can only cheat death

so many times,

and I've used

every trick I know.

You look after her.

She's a decent kid.

And check his Tarot deck.

See if a card's missing.

I'm a reporter.

I'm doing a story on

Elizabeth Gibson,

and I know she lived here.

I didn't know her.

I hardly ever saw

her come and go.

She was quiet.

All right.

I knew what she did for a living.

But whether she used to entertain

her clients here, or not, I couldn't say.

Oh, excuse me. I'm a reporter.

And I'm doing a story

About Elizabeth Gibson.

If there's any comments, anything

you know about her that I...

- What paper? What paper are you from?

- The Washington Post.

I'm one of the top reporters on the...

Did you see All the President's Men?

I was the short guy.

Why is an American paper

interested in this?

No, no, we are, we are.

We're doing a big story.

The Travel and Leisure section

is doing a big spread

on places

to avoid like the plague.

And so, I'm...

I'll make it very worth your while,

you know and...

All right, all right, all right.

I knew Betty Gibson.

And she was very tough.

But I don't think

that she deserved to die.

Did you say Betty Gibson?

Everyone called her Betty.

That was her name.

Really? And did you know

any of her clients at all?

I mean, she knew millions of men, didn't she?

She was very sexy.

You know. Not that you'd know

that from those pictures.

She used to be a really

pretty baby-faced blonde.

You know,

the sort men go nuts for.

A blonde? But in the paper...

The pictures in the paper...

Oh, no, I know, I know.

She made the mistake of cutting

it off and dyeing it black.

God knows why.

Maybe it's to please

one of her regulars.

She had steady clients?

Well, yeah, one for sure.

Look, these guys never use

their real names, okay?

But there was this one rich

kid that she saw a lot.

And his name was Peter.

Peter what?

Peter...

Peter Yardley. Peter Yardley?

Yardley. Yardley.

Hello?

Hello, this is Mr. Spence.

Sid.

Sid Waterman Spence.

This is Sid Waterman Spence.

Where have I called?

Oh, hello, Sidney.

It's Peter Lyman.

Sondra and I are spending the weekend

Rate this script:3.8 / 11 votes

Woody Allen

Heywood "Woody" Allen is an American actor, comedian, filmmaker, and playwright, whose career spans more than six decades. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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