Shall We Dance Page #5

No, l'm afraid not.

The only difference between us

and other married people is...

that we can't even get a divorce.

lf l really could get a divorce from you

before l marry Jim...

that would put a stop

to all these embarrassing falsehoods.

lt certainly would.

Peter, you've got to marry me.

Why, Linda, this is so sudden.

lf we get married now, l could start

divorce proceedings in the morning.

l don't know.

You got me into all this,

the very least you could do is marry me.

lt wasn't my fault

any more than it was yours.

All right, it's my fault...

but you've just got to marry me.

l'd like to think it over.

But why? There's nothing to think over.

All right.

But where can we get a license?

Everybody in New York knows us now.

-Why don't you try New Jersey?

-Thanks.

The name of the bride is?

My real name is Linda Thompson.

And the name of the groom is?

Peter P. Peters.

l beg your pardon...

but what are grounds for divorce

in this state?

Marriage.

Good afternoon.

Lady Tarrington, your suite is ready.

Will you announce me to Mr. Petrov?

-ls Mr. Petrov expecting you?

-Yes, indeed.

Room 2601 .

l'll have you announced.

Petrov, where are you?

Why didn't you telephone?

lt's not Petrov. lt's the desk.

What do you want?

Lady Tarrington?

Yes, have her come right up.

Did you say Lady Tarrington?

Oh, my word, she can't come up here.

Tell her to go back to Paris.

She's already on her way up?

lt's calamitous.

Oh, dear, let me talk to the floor manager.

Cecil Flintridge speaking.

lt's you, Mr. Baird.

How are you?

That doesn't matter.

Now, you stop asking questions and listen.

There is a woman on her way up here...

who started the whole silly rumor

about Petrov's marriage.

Yes, l said ''rumor.''

-Did you say ''rumor''?

-Yes, l said ''rumor''! They are not married!

Denise. lt's you.

-So, they are not married.

-Yes.

That is, not exactly. No.

My journey is going to be more exciting

than l thought.

Oh, dear, you.... You're not going to....

Yes, indeed l am.

That's Petrov now.

l don't wish to shilly-shally,

but l want to know once and for all...

is Petrov married or is Petrov not married?

Yes, he is not.

Johnson.

Change that lock!

Gardenias, 10 cents.

Right here, please.

A corsage for the bride.

-lt's all right.

-Thank you, sir.

Tomorrow, we'll be all straightened out.

You'll be on your way,

and l'll be on my way.

Where?

l've got to get back

to being a bachelor again.

Sort of catch up with my usual gay life.

Forget all this.

l hope you enjoy your gaiety.

Thanks. l hope you enjoy your divorce.

Thanks.

l didn't know getting married

was so depressing.

l'm sorry now l asked you.

That's all right. l'll get over it.

Of course.

l guess the honeymoon's over.

Wouldn't you like to come in for a drink?

No, l don't think so.

Good night.

Maybe you'd prefer a cigarette

or something?

No. Thanks just the same.

l just wanted to thank you for everything.

You're welcome.

Good night.

Sorry.

lt's way past my bedtime.

Good night, Linda.

Come in.

lt's you, Cecil.

Yes, may l come in?

lsn't it way past your bedtime?

Yes, but l haven't been able

to sleep a wink.

l've been waiting up to see you.

-To see me?

-Yes, l....

l must acquaint you

with the varying state of my mind.

lt feels like a veritable pendulum,

to and fro.

Then a moment later, it swings fro and to.

Tell me, Miss Keene, are you Mrs. Petrov?

Or should l say...

Mrs. Petrov, are you Miss Keene?

l'll tell you, Cecil. We are married.

Mrs. Petrov, my best congratulations.

Thank you.

Now l can go to bed

with a clear conscience.

So can l.

Mrs. Petrov, l hope you will forgive me...

but in the storm and stress

of other circumstances...

l rather willfully changed the lock.

But may l present you with this?

Shall we call it

the new key to your happiness?

Thank you.

Thank you.

Good night.

Come in.

Peter.

Why, Denise. Look, you can't come in here.

Why?

Afraid your wife will object?

Yes, exactly.

Peter, please.

Think of a new one.

But l'm married, really.

Save your breath, Pete.

Jeffrey told me the truth.

But even Jeffrey doesn't know.

Are you sure your wife knows?

Please go away, will you?

l don't believe you.

And l won't budge

under any circumstances.

Peter, you're so worked up.

And l love it.

Linda.

-Wait a minute.

-Yes, don't go.

This is Lady Tarrington.

This is my wife, Mrs.... Miss Keene.

l've heard about you.

l hadn't heard about you.

Why have you been so secretive

about this one, Peter?

l didn't think you'd be interested.

How silly of you.

l imagine Lady Tarrington

is quite charming...

when you get to know her.

Yes, she is, l mean....

Then, you really are married to Peter?

Yes, really.

-Do you mind?

-No.

But l do think it'd be awfully pleasant...

if you would divorce him.

No, l'm sure l'll never divorce him.

You know, you're a lot more intelligent

than you look.

Why, thank you.

l wish l could say the same of you.

Good night.

Tai!

l'm sorry, Peter.

No, don't apologize.

You've really done me a great favor.

l certainly didn't mean to.

-Bon voyage,

-Are you going away?

No, but l thought maybe you were.

-l'll send for you, Tai.

-Yes, Miss Linda.

-Good luck, Peter.

-Thanks, Denise.

Linda, Linda darling, she's gone.

May l come in just long enough

to tell you...

how happy l am

that you're not divorcing me?

At least, tell me where you are going.

All right, Linda, if that's the way

you feel about it.

Good luck and bless you.

-Now, what?

-Linda, she's walked out.

This time for good.

For whose good?

Not yours or your creditors'.

-Creditors?

-Yeah, creditors.

You know, the people who come up

because the customers didn't.

This is Arthur Miller.

Send up a case of champagne.

Arthur, have you heard from Linda?

-She just phoned.

-Where is she?

She wouldn't tell me

but left a message for you.

Something about a Lady Tarrington...

and that she was going through

with the divorce as planned.

Why didn't you do something to stop her?

l'm all worn out

stopping her marriage to Montgomery.

What did you do to stop

her marrying him?

Don't you read the papers?

l proved she was married to you

so she couldn't marry him.

-You proved?

-Yes.

You took those pictures. How?

As long as she wasn't

marrying Montgomery...

l thought l could get her in my revue.

But no, you had to horn in.

-So now l've lost her.

-You mean l've lost her.

Petrov!

You're here. Let me tell you....

How do you do, Miss Keene?

You may be interested to learn

that we have no show.

Shake hands with Arthur, he hasn't either.

Really, l'm glad.

The Metropolitan has cancelled

our engagement...

because of the scandalous notoriety...

occasioned by your association

with that woman.

Oh, my word, she's fainted.

lt's just a dummy.

l know she's a dummy.

l've said so all along.

A tap-dancing dummy.

You mean a dumb dummy, of course.

That picture in the paper....

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