Since You Went Away Page #2

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It was very nice of you to come

and visit with me this way.

Not at all, ma'am.

Not at all.

- Mother.

- Yes?

Do you think that I could

be a good secretary?

Ha, a secretary.

Why don't you be a Wac?

You could be their mascot.

All right, go ahead and starve.

See if I care.

Dumb magazines.

Everybody's got magazines.

I know!

Why don't we take somebody

into the house... a roomer?

If you're going to throw away aces,

Jane, that's fine with me.

Mother, why shouldn't we

rent a room?

- There's such a terrible shortage.

- Go away.

Down with five.

It's perfectly ridiculous, Brig.

A stranger in our home.

Where you get your ideas

is beyond me.

Certainly it's ridiculous.

It's Communism... that's what it is.

Oh, pooh.

We could get an officer maybe.

And it might be

sort of like having Pop back.

An officer.

I think maybe she's right.

I understand there's not

a room to be had in town.

It might be very patriotic of us

to take an officer into our house.

Patriotism hasn't

anything to do with it.

You're just crazy

about uniforms.

We should do everything

we can for our soldiers.

Brig, Jane,

now that's enough.

Do you want to finish this game

or don't you?

- 102. It's a blitz.

- Turn out the dining room lights.

Suppose Pop were looking

for a room in some crowded city.

Hurry up, Jane. It can't be

that hard to figure out.

Suppose there was a family

like ours that had three bedrooms.

Don't you think it would be

malicious not to rent a room to Pop?

Well, Jane?

I won almost $6,000.

592 points at $10 a point.

Deduct it from what you owe me.

And poor Pop

sleeping in the park!

All right, all right,

Pop is sleeping in the park

and the people are malicious

and we decide to rent him a room.

- Now you satisfied?

- You'll do it?

I didn't say I'd do it.

I'll think about it.

I knew you couldn't be mean like

those characters in that other city.

Come along.

I wonder how much

we can get for Jane's room.

My room?

How much will that be

for three days?

What?

Brig, turn that thing off.

I can't hear.

I'm awfully sorry.

Yes. Will this get

into the early edition?

Yes. Fireplace and bay window.

Oh, all right.

Put in "homey atmosphere."

Mother! Mother!

Wait, please!

Keep quiet, Brig. Would you send

the bill to this address, please?

Thank you.

You don't mean you're

going to rent your room?

That's the room

that will bring the most money.

I'll take your room, and you

can double up with Jane.

You're not going to put

somebody in Pop's room?

I didn't mean that.

You wouldn't want

those characters in that other city

to put Pop in anything

but their best room, would you?

But that's different.

He's Pop.

Good morning.

Is this the place

that advertised for an officer?

That's right.

With the real fireplace,

nice bay window, southern exposure?

That's right.

I haven't seen the room yet,

but the homey atmosphere seems okay.

I guess it's a deal.

I'm sorry, but the room's

already taken.

Oh, I see.

I'm sorry you had

the trip for nothing.

Yes, I can see

you're grief-stricken.

Hi, beaver.

Good morning.

Mrs. Hilton, I presume.

Yes.

May I be permitted to observe,

this is the first house I've found

in this godforsaken community

- that doesn't smell of cabbage.

- Well, it does sometimes.

I was given to understand

at the office of the Purchasing Division,

to which I have

the misfortune to be attached,

that you had a room for rent.

Yes, but I specified an officer.

You see, my husband...

My name is Smollett, William G.,

Colonel, United States Army, retired.

Retired, I might add, by virtue

of certain fatuous opinions

held in the War Department

which judge a man's usefulness

neither by his experience

nor his ability,

but by the number of years

since he was weaned.

Soda.

There was nothing

in the information I was furnished

which indicated that you

had children and domestic pets.

I'm sorry, but they

go with the house.

We won't discuss it.

With your permission, madam,

may we dispense

with further conversation?

I should like

to inspect the room.

Certainly. Just follow me.

I do hope you'll forgive me

if I've been long-winded.

Not at all, madam.

Through a full

and somewhat protracted existence,

I have learned to accept

the natural tendency

of all women to be garrulous.

You're very tolerant, Colonel.

This is an outrage!

Mrs. Hilton!

Can I do anything for you,

Colonel Smollett?

- Mother's busy in the kitchen.

- Indeed you can, Miss Hilton.

You can tell me

who had the kindness

to leave on my bed this

pronouncement from Washington,

this lesson in old-world

courtesy and manners.

I did that, Colonel Smollett.

I thought it might

make it easier for us to get along.

Would you mind helping me

with my aquarium?

What?

Mother's going to use this room.

I have to get my things into Jane's room.

Now, if you'll just

grab that end there...

Now you walk backwards

and I'll steer you.

The big one seems to be

the commanding officer.

- Don't you think that's intriguing?

- Fascinating.

It's a little over to the right.

Be careful not to shake them.

They're very sensitive.

You must forgive me

if I do anything wrong.

This is my first experience

hauling fish.

Thanks, Colonel.

I'll do as much for you someday.

I'll tell you what you

can do for me, young woman.

There are certain elaborate

suggestions on page three

of this war communiqu

concerning the condition,

the schedule, and the equipment

of the bathroom.

- Oh, yes.

- You do see?

Then may I ask you

to follow me for a moment?

It was my idea

that we should take in a roomer,

and I'm so glad the whole thing's

turned out so super.

Since you are so ecstatic

over the whole arrangement,

may I ask you whether you

expect me to bathe under that?

Golly, there's a shower

off Pop's room... I mean your room.

And is it necessary

that your paying guest

share the facilities of the house

with this vegetable life?

You don't understand. This is

the philodendron Pop gave me.

It needs water. I don't think rain water

gives it enough nourishment.

Really? As soon as there's

no longer any danger

of pernicious anemia, would you

mind removing that topsoil?

Yes, and another thing.

I neglected to inform your mother

that I like my breakfast

promptly at 7:
00...

coffee, thin toast, and two

eggs boiled, 21/2 minutes...

under no circumstances

more than three.

We can't afford

to give you breakfast.

As it is now, poor Mother

doesn't know what to do.

When Fidelia was here, the bills

didn't seem to be so high, but now...

Please.

I'm quite prepared to pay.

That's fine. What would you say

to 50 cents a day?

- That seems a bit high.

- We'll make it $3 a week.

There's the doorbell.

Let's call it a deal. Good night.

But...

Let me see...

...a week for rent...

...for breakfast.

Fidelia!

This is a nice surprise.

I thought I'd run down and see

how you all was getting along.

- Just about the way you predicted.

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