Sing Page #4

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just nod

or shake your head, okay?

How was that, dad?

You're still too soft

on them corners, Johnny.

You got to attack 'em.

And you're crunching the gears.

I told you, you got

to be gentle with the...

Look, turn that down.

Oi!

Listen to your father!

"Too soft on the corners,

Johnny."

"You're not doing it right,

Johnny."

"Speed up, Johnny."

"Do it like I showed you."

Whoa!

Dad?

Oh, no.

I've run over my dad.

Now, that is more like it.

And the three little pigs

- lived happily ever after.

Good night, my dears.

Norman, are you awake?

How was your day, honey?

Same as always.

-It was?

-Mm-hmm.

I don't know

how you do it all, honey.

-Good night.

-Good night.

All creatures great and small,

- welcome to the moon theater!

Mr. moon?

-I have Judith from the bank.

-What?

Whoa, no, no, no. Tell her I'll

call her back in the morning.

Oh, I can't.

She's right here.

Judith! Hello.

I work for a bank,

not a charity,

and if your accounts

are not settled

-by the end of the month...

-Okay, Judith...

I personally guarantee,

by the end of this month,

this show is going to be

the biggest hit

this city has ever seen.

Mr. moon, none of your shows

have ever worked.

None of them!

You've had your chances.

Now, settle your accounts,

or we will repossess

this property.

Okay. Toodle-oo.

What are you going to do,

Mr. moon?

Honestly, uh...

I have no idea.

Mmm. Are you wearing

a speedo, Eddie?

What... what are you...?

Eddie?

Is everything all right?

Yeah, uh,

just doing my laps, ma!

So, what, you live

in the pool house now?

Yeah, my folks want me

to be more,

you know, independent, I guess.

They even hooked me up

with this life coach dude.

-Life coach?

-Yeah.

I guess he's gonna help me

find my purpose in life.

I thought I had one,

but it turns out

it wasn't the right one

or something.

I don't know.

Anyway, he's got me

on this whole schedule thing.

It's, like, mondays,

take out the recycling;

Tuesdays, mow the lawn;

Wednesdays, go visit Nana;

Thursdays, clean the pool.

It's like, don't we have people

to do all of this stuff?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,

whoa, whoa. Back up.

Your Nana is still alive?

Oh, yeah.

Wow.

And she's rich, right?

She's loaded.

But trust me, you don't want

to go near my Nana.

She is one mean sheep.

Good. Lower the moon.

-Coffee?

-Thank you, miss crawly.

Okay, that's normal.

Just needs a knock.

--See? You're getting it.

Anyone seen my glass eye?

The darn thing

keeps popping out.

Whoa!

You almost killed me, jumbo!

-It wasn't me.

-Oh, is that so?

- Pete?

Pete!

- You're gonna be all right.

- Okay, just... -

- just hang in there, buddy.

- Ricki? Kai?

Why aren't you guys rehearsing?

We're through.

They said I'm

an intolerable egomaniac.

I don't even know

what that means.

All right.

We're two acts down.

Give me some good news,

miss crawly.

Oh, it's not as bad as it looks.

Uh...

- Oopsie-Daisy.

Meena, how would you like

to re-audition for the show?

Really? Well, yeah.

-Great.

-I mean, no.

What?

I-i mean, yes, I can sing.

But no, i-i get so nervous,

and... i-i can't do it.

I mean, I would totally do it,

but... no, I... no.

I'm gonna take that as a maybe.

Great! Look, they're back.

Uh, we're gonna come back

to this, meena.

Listen, guys,

forget what I said before.

You are very talented.

Please, join the show, okay?

Yes? No?

Oh, um... here.

What? Hey, no, no, no.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

D-don't go, don't go!

Oh, what is this for?

Now, we use this

to follow the steps.

Caspar! Caspar, no!

How about this? Ha-ha!

- Come on. What did I tell you?

I'm so sorry.

He had a fever,

and it was too late

to get a sitter, so...

--Well, you seem fine now.

Wow!

--I am not singing this.

What's not to like?

You're a female,

and you're a teenager.

This song was made for you.

Wow. It's like you can

see inside my tiny

teenage mind.

I know, right?

You just gotta add some moves

and a little bit of...

-Go for it!

-Oh, you mean like this?

There you go.

You're a natural.

Yes, that was very bad.

Johnny.

Come in. Over.

Oh, Johnny,

your jacket's talking.

Johnny, where are you?

Dad, what's going on? Over.

What do you mean,

you gotta leave now?

I know.

I'm... I'm so sorry.

It's just, I've got

this family business thing.

Do I need to start worrying

about your commitment here,

Johnny?

-Tell me no.

-No. Absolutely not.

I promise it won't happen again.

-It better not.

-Thank you, Mr. moon.

Hi. I'm Becky.

Becky?

Hey, what did you expect?

You're never around anymore.

I did it for us, Lance!

You and me!

Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry.

I think I left

my sunglasses in there.

Come on, Becky.

Let's get out of here.

Jackpot, baby!

-Whoo-hoo!

-Ooh!

Well, I say we call it

a night there, fellas.

Hey, uh, put the cash

in my car, will you, Derek?

Well, you're one great

card player, Mike.

- Not so bad yourself.

-Ooh...

Except I still can't tell

how you cheated.

Cheated? Cheated?

Oh, I am offended.

Come on, baby,

let's cut some rug.

Oh!

Wh-what the...?

Oh.

How did that get there?

-Run for it, baby!

-Hey!

Whoo!

Get him!

Excuse me.

Don't let him get away!

-Thanks, Derek.

-Out of the way.

So long, suckers!

Good morning, buster.

-Hey, Eddie. How are you?

-Good.

-How's the show going?

-Ah, it's going great.

Hey, that's a sharp jacket

you've got on today.

Oh, thanks.

Wait.

What are you doing here?

Eddie, you can't come

visit your Nana

without bringing her

some flowers.

-Here.

-What? No!

Buster, no! Don't go in there!

Yes, can I help...?

-Buster!

-Ah, Nana!

Just look at you, dear.

Wow!

You don't look a day over 90.

Oh, my gosh.

Buster moon.

We met at Eddie's graduation.

Oh, lucky me.

A visit from my useless grandson

and his ghastly little

theater friend.

Look at that-- she remembers me.

Okay, Nana...

How would you like

to be the sponsor

for a very prestigious prize?

Not for that singing contest

i saw on the news.

That's the one.

Oh, I see.

You don't have the money,

do you?

Well, we don't quite have it

all locked in...

Well, you'll not get

a cent out of me.

Nana, please, just listen to me

-for one second, okay?

-No, absolutely not.

-Don't listen to him, Nana.

-I'm not listening

-to either of you.

-Just wait one second.

Lapsang souchong, no sugar,

and be quick about it.

Uh, Nana, i-i don't know

how to make tea.

Wow. I saw this show

when I was a kid.

Nana, you were

absolutely amazing.

Please, this flattery is futile.

I have no intention

of bailing you out.

Your pathetic shows

are the reason

that theater

no longer has an audience.

Oh, but this show is gonna...

Gonna pack 'em in

like it did

in the good old days.

They were not "good old days,"

Mr. moon.

They were magnificent.

And that theater of yours,

it was a palace

of wonder and magic.

But, Nana, it still is.

-Yeah, right.

-Ow!

I can recall the ushers

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